Fantasies

[bridie69]

I am feeling like I am getting closer to being emotionally ready for a fulfilling physical relationship. In the meantime I am exploring some new and longstanding sexual fantasies. Just wondered if you all had fantasies like this and if and when I start a physical relationship with a new partner, do the fantasies stop or continue?

I had fantasies before my partner and since meeting him we've enacted a lot, luckily we are on the same wavelength so it doesn't mean disrespecting the other or making each other feel uncomfortable in asking.

And talking about them with each other during sex really increases the libido.

There are done we probably won't enact but just enjoy talking about. I think because the fantasy is easier or more straight forward than the reality.

Well, I think fulfilling sexual fantasies with your dp is brilliant, with the obvious provisos re no-one feeling pressured to do anything they don't feel comfortable with. A guideline: however great fulfilling the fantasy is, don't let it take over completely, otherwise it can end up feeling like it's the fantasy act/clothes/situation that's most important, not the person. So keep the fantasy as the icing on the cake, as it were. For every occasion you act out the fantasy, make sure there's one when you simply take your clothes off and have a long, loving, intimate time together, no extras just each other. I did this with the very common fantasy of sexy underwear. It was great to act out all sorts of scenarios and wear sexy stuff, but I ended up wanting it every time, and that can send the message 'it's the kink I'm really into, not you.'

My ex suggested we fantasise about sleeping with someone else and then share who we fantasised about - apparently George Clooney was okay for her choice but my much more down to earth answer of "your sister" got me kicked out of bed.