Any ideas how I can Make school stop forcing DD to do PE?

[EccentricaGallumbits]

Her knees are knackered (Osgood Schlatter) and has a Ballet exam in March.

She has stopped playing football and I have to drive her to and from school for a while until she canwalk it again.

Bloody school (I know I'm moaning about them again but.....) have ignored the letters I have sent in for the last couple of weeks and tell her she'll be fine to do circuits . And street dance

She won't be fine. She needs to stop and let them recover if she has any hope of doing her exam.

I'm going to try to get the GP to write them a letter but last time she had a flare up it took weeks to persuade school to listen.

You need to get the GP to write a note on proper headed paper.

Prehaps your daughter should give up ballet as well.

You're not going to get anywhere telling them they need to stop making her exercise so she can do a ballet exam. Ballet is much harder on the knees than circuits - if she can't do PE she can't do ballet.

Agree with Coldtits - it wouldn't come across at all well.

Get her a stick - I have something that means i have a lot of pain on and off but it's not consistent. I kept getting made to do PE with semi-dislocated joints no matter what got sent to school.

Had bad ankle one day, mum gave me a stick so I could cope, low and behold didn't have to do PE and not even a letter - my ankle healed sooo much faster.

Depends on the kind of condition the OPs dd has, if she can do ballet or not. My dd was actually recommended ballet by her paed but told not to do most kinds of PE, including contact sports and anything involving jumping. The reason being that her joints could at that time cope with controlled movement (=ballet) but not with anything uncontrolled. It was also the case that she was allowed to do things at certain times (good days) and not at certain other times (flare-ups). Something that was perfectly safe one month could land her in a wheelchair the next.

So I wouldn't jump to conclusions here.

get her gp to phone them as well as write to them.

You need to explain to them why she can do ballet but not PE. Explain how the condition prevents pe at school, but not ballet. Once they understand how that can be so, they might be more helpful. If they don't understand, they might think you are taking the piss.

If your dd has a variable condition, it's absolutely essential that you spell this out to the school, as most people are simply not used to this concept: they think you are either in a wheelchair or not as it were. Can't cope with someone who might need a wheelchair in the morning and do PE in the afternoon (that would be both my children).

cross-post with heQuet there.

Will go to GP. She isn't doing full ballet lessons at the mo - no jumping or character stuff, and by tomorrow i suspect she'll have to watch rather than take part.

Now got to sort out the logistics of driving her to school when i have to be 60 miles away at the same time, while persuading DD2 to go to school. oh joy.

I know. Just very unfortunate timing that it is getting bad again right now.

She's hoing if she only does mimnum ballet she can get through this exam. I suspect not but don't want to break the news to her because i am a wuss and it is going to cause lots of tears and heartbreak.

Even if they don't take part they still have to get changed and stand around getting cold and feeling left out or help referee.

Just googled Osgood Schlatters and sounds to me like you may well have to break the news that she can't do it. It is very hard when they have to give up something they love- dd had to give up ballet last year and was devastated- but sometimes needs must.

Definitely sounds like she shouldn't be doing PE though; give her a letter from her GP to wave under the teacher's nose. And using a stick might well help her image; dd takes a wheelchair to school every day even when she doesn't use it, and I think that helps to rub it in.

I googled too (cos I'm nosey) and found this.
I thought the bit about relieving the pain might be useful as it advises using compression bandages. If your dd had her knees bandaged they couldn't make her do PE could they?
Otherwise what other people have said about having a stick makes sense because this article says crutches might be necessary.

Will make appointment with GP (again). I have broached the giving-it-up-for-now talk. She wept. bitterly. for ages .

We'll see if a couple of weeks without anything at all makes a diofference.

I knew of one parent who called her child from school at start of Pe lesson and brought him back at end. She took him to a swimming pool which was the only exercise he could do which wasn't possible at school.
Don't know if this is helpful or not

My son was out of pe and games for about a year due to Perthes disease. The school, on my suggestion, arranged for him to do alternative classes during those times - I think he helped out with a younger class and sat around playing with computers (ie "did IT" ). They were utterly fantastic with it all though and the headmistress and teachers couldn't have done more.

I find this completely baffling. If a school has a letter from a child's doctor saying that he or she can't do PE, they don't over ride that and make them do it, do they? If they do, you should go straight to the Chair of Governors.

Seeker, I don't quite know how to break this to you:

Schools don't always do what they are supposed to. They are run by humans and humans can make mistakes.

Teachers don't always do what they are supposed to, either. Long after dd was been diagnosed, she was still coming across individual teachers who took it upon themselves to decide that they know best.

And then of course there are cases when communications break down and teachers simply have not been given information they should have been given: not all teachers will listen to a teen in such a situation. (In dd's last school, medical information was never passed on to teachers and meetings with SENCO/head never involved teachers in any way. New school much better)

Best plan in the latter case is for child to carry copy of dr's letter: but there are teachers who don't want to be interrupted.

Some children find it really hard to contradict a teacher too; dd is in this category and has now been issued with a red card as the school recognises the problem.

oh seeker they can.

I damaged my back when I was 16. My gp wrote a letter to the school explaining I could not do PE for the current term, the only exercise I could do was swimming, as this would strenghten my back.

The school did not have a swimming pool. There was a public pool 5 minutes walk away. I had one our free after PE. I suggested I get dispensation to go to the pool instead of gym, as I would just make it back and forth due to my free hour after the PE. The school refused. As there were no pool on the premises they could not let me off to go swimming. I failed PE that year.

But really, is ballet such a good idea? By the sounds of it, she is going to be a pretty mediocre ballet dancer, if she already now cant do jumps etc. Do you really want to set her up for disappointment? Isnt it better to build all round fitness, let her walk and do PE than insist on ballet?

I read a behind the scenes article, written by a woman who followed a Russian famous ballet troup. She wrote about how they all howled with pain, and massaged their aching joints and muscles behind the scenes between their performance times, wiped their tears, put a straight face on and went out to perform. I cannot watch the beatuy of ballet anymore when I know the pain it inflicts on the performers.

Quint, not everybody has to do ballet to the standards of famous Russian ballet troupes. When dd did ballet, it was always on the understanding that everybody did the best they could; girls who could go up on pointes did pointes; the rest did something else. The ballet school prided itself on its inclusiveness; they had children with SN and found a way of including everybody in their shows; they just organised the dance routine to fit round everybody's abilities. ( I miss them). It didn't mean the children were set up for disappointment: most of them were quite level headed enough to enjoy dancing for its own sake without thinking it would automatically turn them into Darcey Bussell.

You can still enjoy something even if you are only a mediocre performer. This is something that we need to recapture as a society: the fact that you are allowed to be an amateur and still try your hand at things. (after all, I don't stop ds from playing football with his friends just because he is not showing any signs of talent)

Though possibly there are medical reasons not to dance in the present case.

even at the cost of schooling, Cory?

No no, Quint, I did say that maybe it is best for this particular girl not to do it, if it's going to muck up other things.