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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

Original poster

Is it normal for them to not be put in a class with any of their friends ??

28 replies

NervousNutty · 22/06/2009 16:22

On saturday we had a letter telling us which house dd1 was going to be when she starts secondary school in Sept.

Have just seen her on her way to music club and she said no other girls from her class are in that house, so they won't be in her form class.

I could tell she is a bit dissapointed. She is a very socialble girl and has alot of friends and would probably have been happy with almost any girl from her current class being in her new class.

There may be girls in her form from the other yr6 class but she said she isn't really friends with anyone in the other class.

I know she will make new friends, but I am thinking it is slightly unfair for them to put her on her own.

OP posts:
bigTillyMint · 22/06/2009 16:26

Do most of the Y6's go on to the same school?

Round here you're lucky if any of your class go to the same school as you - they go off to about 20 different schools!

GrungeBlobPrimpants · 22/06/2009 16:28

Hmm. Around here they usually put 2-3 children from the same primary in a class, but no more than that (so no 'ghettos', lots of mixing etc). It does vary though. Some schools ask parents beforehand who their dc would like to be with (eg he/she would like to be in same class as X, but please not with Y), some don't and just allocate.

It could be worth contacting Year 7 tutor/admissions and ask if there is a possibity of your dd being in a different class. It is possible they didn't realise that the other girls from the school were from a different class?

Original poster
NervousNutty · 22/06/2009 16:38

Thanks for the relpies.

The majority go to this school yes, with a few going to a local grammer and another slightly less popular school.

I will speal to dd later and see if she'd like me to ask them if it is possible she be pout with at least one friendly face.

She is 1000 times more confident than I was at her age though so she may tell me it is ok, she just looked a little dissapointed as she was telling me.

OP posts:
Original poster
NervousNutty · 22/06/2009 16:38

Oh and how weird to be posting in this section lol. It makes me feel old.

OP posts:
hana · 22/06/2009 16:40

I think this would be a logistical nightmare for the school though, likely 200+ year 7s to sort into houses. They can't be expected to keep everyone happy. sounds like your daughter is pretty confident. I wouldn't request a change.

Polgara2 · 22/06/2009 16:41

When dd1 started she was happy that some friends were in her form but then discovered that she was not actually going to have ANY lessons with them! She was upset at first but has made new friends and still sees her old ones at lunch etc.

I did think about trying to get it changed but came to the conclusion that it would be a good thing because she can't expect to go through life doing the same things as her friends, like college, university etc.

Original poster
NervousNutty · 22/06/2009 16:43

Oh yes i think it will probably do her good in the long run, was just a bit surprised that she wasn't with anyone.

I was with quite a few of my friends when i went up to secondary, but then that was many years ago and a different school lol.

OP posts:
Squidward · 22/06/2009 16:44

two diffo aporaches here

  1. you can request( dsses were granted)
  2. the school arranges it.

Tbh the kids i know of soon break primary frienships where there isa bigger pot of potential new pals to choose from

hth

bigchris · 22/06/2009 16:45

when I was at secondary school everyone from my primary, which was admittedly a small primary, was put into the same house
It was only for registration, and where your locker was etc, but it was really helpful
so all my siblings were in my house too
I think it's wierd they haven't put her with at least one

MadreInglese · 22/06/2009 16:45

Isn't each form class split into the different houses, so she may still be in a class with friends IYSWIM?

MadreInglese · 22/06/2009 16:46

or is it like classes 1 & 2 in blue house, clases 3 & 4 in red house, etc?

OrmIrian · 22/06/2009 16:46

When DS started in Yr 7 there were only 5 pupils from his primary school going with him. The school made an effort to put him in a tutor groups with some of them - the other feeder school was so overwhelming in numbers.

He has spent hardly any time with those children in reality - has made plenty of new ones. I think it's quite a good new start.

Original poster
NervousNutty · 22/06/2009 16:47

No they stay in their house groups for form classes, but have lessons with other houses.

She will probably have some friends in her actual lessons, but not in her form class.

OP posts:
maryz · 22/06/2009 16:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MadreInglese · 22/06/2009 16:49

So won't she only have registration with her form class

oh and PSHRCSE class or whatever it's called now

elliepac · 22/06/2009 16:50

At our school, forms and houses are two different things. Forms are normally allocated so everybody has someone they know in it, usually a friend. Houses are allocated randomly. It may be that this is the case at your school and you may well find that she is in a form group with her friends. In addition it is also important to note that not very much time is spent in form groups, only 15 mins a day at our school so she will have to adjust pretty quickly to being without her friends, especially if they are of different academic abilities.

Squidward · 22/06/2009 16:53

Nut i am desp to know where if not GB.. PB?

Original poster
NervousNutty · 22/06/2009 16:55

Lol, no, I don't live in GB anymore. She is going to FF. Think of Filofax.

OP posts:
Squidward · 22/06/2009 17:25

Oh yes.
ooh get you

dexter73 · 22/06/2009 19:34

This happened to my dd last year. Her teacher noticed that she hadn't been put with any of her friends and notified the secondary school who then moved her into a class with some of her friends. This was all done without us knowing until afterwards. I was quite impressed with her teacher for taking the time to go through the lists and to sort this out as she would have been upset to not be with her friends.

Original poster
NervousNutty · 22/06/2009 20:08

Lol squid, don't know how you managed to forget that. Really pleased she got into FF as it is a brilliant school. Better than GB

Have now spoken to Dd1 about the it all and although she said she is dissapointed, I have managed to persuade her that it will be fine.

Spoke to another mum who's dd was in the same position last year and she said she felt that it was a good thing in the end.

OP posts:
Squidward · 22/06/2009 20:42

tell her i KNOW
i asked some kids about it the other day and its a big non issue. tell her that she will be lucky not to have to get rid of old mates to make new ones

Original poster
NervousNutty · 22/06/2009 20:47

Yeah I think you are right, and I think she will be glad of new friends tbh

I will tell her that you said so lol.

OP posts:
slummymummy36 · 23/06/2009 00:17

It must be a bit nerve wracking for her but at the end of the day there is only 1 first day and one first week.

By the end of the first week, she will have made lots of new friends. Then she has the next 5 years with them!

My best friend had to point this out to her DD this time last year. A year on and her DD is raely in cntact with any of her junior school friends and has a whole new circle from 1 year ago.

katiestar · 24/06/2009 15:03

My eldest go to alocal grammar school and it is policy to split children up from those they were at primary with.I think it is a very good thing as it widens their circle of friends.Others will be in the same boat and She will make some friends at induction day I'm sure