How would you approach the school about this?

[Freckle]

We were involved in a car accident just before the schools went back. Not serious, but we were hit from by a Volvo travelling at about 30-40 mph. Only apparent injury was to DS2 who hurt his neck. We have had a number of medical appointments about this, and the A&E consultant advised that he avoid contact sports for a few weeks.

I wrote a letter to the school advising of this and asking that all games teachers be notified. DS2 came home from school yesterday having had a double games period during which he was made to play football. He was knocked down during the game and jarred his neck. We have had a dreadful night with him in a lot of pain (despite having taken 2 codeine tablets - prescribed by gp). DH is furious and has drafted a letter to DS2's form teacher, in which he mentions he is a solicitor and goes on to touch on the school's liability if DS2's injury is worsened by the school ignoring medical advice.

WWYD?

sorry but I still dont by what your children are saying to you. They must know the policy for failure to bring in PE kit or if they are ill or injured. If PE departments didnt stipulate these rules there would be chaos in the lesson. As we all know some of the pupils dont actually enjoy PE or cant be bothered. If there were no rules kids wouldnt bring kit, the lesson would then be pretty hard to manage. I dont know any state school that doesnt have a policy on kit. Plus its the beginning of the year, this is when all rules are drummed into the pupils. Is it an independent school?

No, it's a state school. And the boys don't get out of PE if they don't have their kit, they get to use spares or lost property - eeww.

Neither boy was aware that any letter regarding non-participation in PE has to be given to the PE teacher. They both thought that, if it was given to their form tutor, that was fine, especially if the letter was addressed to that tutor. I have just asked DS1 again and he said that all he knows about the procedure for non-participation in PE is what he has observed other boys doing. He has never received any instruction about it.

Well, if you want to get legal, ignorance is no excuse.

Ignorance of the law is no excuse. But I don't think that applies to children being ignorant of school rules which have not been explained to them. It would however apply to a school which claims to be ignorant of its legal liability towards its pupils.

Sorry that came across as i wasnt believing you. Im just used to working in inner city london, where you have to be strict about policies for non participants,(or you wouldnt get half the class participating) although not handing in a note to the PE teacher is unusual. Is it a really nice school, with good kids?, maybe they dont usually get the problems of non participation.

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Oh for goodness sake, of course we aren't going to court over this. However the school is leaving itself open to a claim for damages if a parent writes in and says no PE for medical reasons and the school tries to absolve itself of responsibility for any injury by saying that, although a member of staff had received the instruction, it was the child's fault for not passing it on personally to the PE staff - especially if the child was unaware that this was the procedure. This was what DH was trying to point out to them.

As I said ages ago, if they had said sorry that this happened (and saying sorry isn't automatically an indication of liability), we will look into the matter, rather than calling me (rather than DH who wrote the letter) and basically saying it was all DS2's fault, I doubt I would be quite so cross about it all. I would like to think that this incident might have highlighted a gap in their procedures which they would address, but, if they refuse to accept that this is the case, that's unlikely.

And I'm not certain where we have made "constant" references to litigation as we have only written one letter, which did not mention litigation, merely their legal liability if they make a habit of ignoring medical advice.

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Freckle I think what people are trying to say is that once you mentioned litigation the school will close shop on you. To be fair most parents dont write letters to the school advising them of their legal responsibilities. Most parents would ring the school first, rather than a letter,to explain what went wrong and how it could be put right. I think then you would have got a very different response.

Well, it's not the first time DS2 has been blamed for a situation, as has been detailed on another thread (probably rather ancient now). He was bullied mercilessly last year because he has long hair. According to the school, this is his fault for being different. Absolves them of the responsibility of dealing with the bullies.

It was not my intention to refer to the legalities so often. It's just the way the thread has developed, as so often happens and certain aspects of threads take on a life of their own.

Why dont you look at changing schools? It sounds to me the school doesnt communicate well with its parents.

I wrote to the form tutor about DS2's absence from school the preceding day and used the same letter to pass on the instructions from the A&E consultant. It was this consultant who used the phrase "contact sport", so I passed this on. With hindsight (as always) perhaps this should have extended to all sports, but I seriously didn't think his neck was at risk doing stuff such as rowing or dance.

As for keeping him off school because of lack of sleep, I don't really think that's a good idea as we have no idea how long his neck will take to heal. After all, we mothers don't stop life because of lack of sleep, do we? But it does mean that we sometimes forget stuff.

We have advised the school that he is on strong painkillers, yes. I think that, generally, he is OK to be in school, just that lack of sleep can impair his thinking so he might not challenge decisions which he might otherwise do. To be honest, although he can be a defiant so-and-so at home, he is a quiet and diligent student at school and it would be a rare occurrence for him to do anything other than what he is told to do by a teacher. So, if told to do a particular sport, he would think that, the teacher having read the letter re no contact sports, it was OK to do that sport.

Most boys enjoy football. I can't help but wonder whether your son failed to explain his injury to the PE teacher because he did not want to miss out. It would be an absurd and highly-improbable school procedure for information regarding ability to do sport on a particular day to be passed on to the form tuter instead of the PE teacher.

The letter was addressed to the form tutor because I had to explain DS2's absence from school the preceding day. I went on to explain about the sport issue and asked them to ensure the PE staff knew. The form tutor read the letter, gave it back to DS2 and told him to give it to the PE teacher, which he did. The PE teacher is now saying he never saw the letter. Clearly, in future, I will send in two letters. I am a little uncomfortable with this reliance on the child to remember to pass on the letter because children do forget, which is why I specifically asked the form tutor to do it.

DS2 doesn't enjoy football, although he loves his sports generally. It was a double period and perhaps the thought of 2 hours doing nothing was not attractive, but, equally, he thought it was OK to play because the teacher told him to after having read the letter.

Freckle by writing a note you yourself are relying on your child to hand it in the first place! So there will always be some reliance on your child to actually remember to show the letter in the first place to a teacher.

The fact you wrote to the form tutor explaining his absence and the need for no contact sport due to his injuries which the form tutor read and then asked your DS to show it to the PE teacher makes sense to me. I mean the form tutor might not see a member of the PE dept during the course of the day but your DS obviously would. I personally would have said no sport and especially so if he's on auto pilot due to lack of sleep/being in pain and taking strong analgesia. I also think that a child of 12 who is told his PE activites are limited would be more than capable of handing over a letter.

He is much more likely to remember to hand in a letter during registration, i.e. first thing in the morning, no other distractions, letter tucked into planner which he will be looking at to check his schedule. For him to be expected to remember to pass the same letter on at some point during the day (or indeed another day if he doesn't have PE that day), when he may not have his bag with him as they are in the changing rooms, and there are other lessons to occupy his mind, is less certain.

In any event, he was held back from games on the day he handed the letter to the PE teacher, so his teacher's assurance that he had never seen the letter doesn't appear to hold water.

Really? I'd have thought if he wasn't allowed to do something he'd be more likely to talk to the PE teacher and say I've got a note from my mum.

How many PE teachers does he have? My DD has 3 PE lessons a week all with different teachers.

I'm sure that the school will be looking into the matter and looking at procedures for children unable to do PE. The fact your DH made a veiled threat re legal action might make them reluctant to talk to you till a full investigation has been made.

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