Y11 2025/26 The Final Stretch

[UncomfortableSilence]

New thread to see our wonderful DC through their exams and onwards.

Come and join for chat, support and solidarity.

@3GoldenLampsSounds really really tough, sending you and DS a big unmumsnetty hug. I hope today is a better day for you all.

@3GoldenLamps your post made me so sad. At 15/16, children should know better and be inclusive.i hope today is a better day for him. Id be tempted to speak to school, not so that they fix it, but so that they understand that send children can be isolated even in the most innocent of situation...

Yesterday / today our son has started feeling very anxious. I really feel for him. He’s predicted good grades and he’s putting a lot of pressure on himself. His computer has a problem and he’s completely fixated on that but I think that’s a symptom and the underlying cause is worry about his exams. I’m pleased he’s talking to us but I’m not sure how best to help him. He just wants to feel better.

@3GoldenLamps I’m so sorry. It’s understandable that you and your DS feel distressed. What shines through is your powerful love and care for him. He has that strong foundation, the best love there is. But it doesn’t make the current situation easier for you 💐

My DD has a virus, sore throat, runny nose - thankfully not this time next week! I'm letting her sleep it off this morning and hope she is up for some revision later. What level of work is everyone doing at this point? I figure it is too late for the topics she struggles with and just concentrate on what will get her marks. Also past papers for mainly maths and science.

She is struggling with the volume of history and lit which is understandable, and I am struggling to help her to make all of that manageable a week out!

Edited to add @3GoldenLamps I have an autistic DS who has found his people at college. He is still happiest in his room gaming but his social skills have improved so much. Secondary is so hard for some kids but they can be themselves so much more the older they get. Lots of love and support to you both.

Just a quick post to send love to @3GoldenLamps and her lovely DS….oh goodness your posts really got me too. As I’ve written on previous posts I have an older DS with asd/adhd who has struggled in the past and I know will continue to struggle. I hear you wholeheartedly on the ‘micro griefs’. Also sending you both a hug and lots of positive vibes for DS for sixth form and beyond 💐

@3GoldenLamps sending love and positive thoughts to you both too. It's so hard sometimes/

Related to this my DD came home yesterday with her shirt signed. She wouldn't let me read the messages (standard!) but she did tell me about a signature / message from Molly. Molly had apparently written my DD a message on her shirt saying thankyou for being kind and speaking to her when she was new to the school (Y9 starter) and knew no one, it made her feel much happier. DD has no memory of it at all, and her and Molly aren't in the same friend groups now at all. DD was surprised when she asked to sign her shirt. But it just shows the effect we can have on others. I told DD I was so proud of her for that.

So GoldenLamps I hope your DS finds his tribe soon - I know he will and some other kind souls and him will make friends x

DD enjoyed her last morning in school yesterday, seems relaxed and the subshine is definitely a plus. I gave her room a deep clean and sort out. Went to get her prom dress shortened in the afternoon (£40 ouch!). Had activities in the evening and today so I don't think much revision as yet.

First exams are Latin and Drama next Friday.

Latin here on Friday too! First proper exam (after Art ones this week)..

My dd is doing 3-4 hours a day at the weekend, 1.5-2.5h mon-thurs including after school sessions at school. Nothing on Fridays. So a fair bit but not the maximum possible. She would burn out if she did (adhd and just her personality!). She’s aiming for 7+ in stronger subjects and 5+ in weaker. So not going for the top grades but wants to do her best while maintaining wellbeing. I am happy with that.

@3GoldenLamps your poor DS. Would have thought both students and teachers would be more sensitive about this kind of thing.

DD scared herself last night by starting a very tricky biology paper and then realising she'd downloaded an A level paper by mistake!

She's got German and Drama this week, last day is Wednesday but only for a couple of hours. Then they're all planning on going somewhere to play rounders, rather than revising, but as it's the last day they'll all be together, I don't think I can say no.

Week after looks pretty heavy (for everyone?) with English lit, biology, history and maths.

Just checking in - DS is pretty relaxed at the moment, but I’m aware he might get stressed once the actual exams begin.

I feel like a lot is expected from them at a young age. And what seems like an already high number of GCSEs and then Further Maths on top feels like even more.

still bogged down by history / poems. Son hasn’t done much at all today. I’m hoping he’ll crack on

I feel this is the last "long stretch" of revising. DD did a bit of biology and drama this morning. We have just been out to collect her prom dress, which is over a foot too long so I need to book alterations. She's over the moon with it, so a little bit of positive in her day, that's always good. Her plan is a couple of papers this afternoon, likely biology and history. She got her last assembly yesterday and got the award for dance and history. I'm super proud of her, she worked so hard at history and I'm just glad the teacher noticed the effort she has been putting in.

I've discovered today when going to top up DS's dinner money account that he didn't have lunch on Friday which was the day of his first exam in the afternoon. He says he was revising for the exam so didn't go to lunch. He has dismissed all my concerns and offers of packed lunches etc and says it's fine because he had snacks 🙈 so much for my excellent exam nutrition prep! Guess I need to get in some good snacks.

My DD hasn't eaten any of her packed lunches or had dinners at school because she's too nervous to eat, so I've also bought lots of snacks and hoped for the best. I let her pick dinner the night before the exams so at least she's had a substantial dinner.

My DS is a bit variable atm. He swam in the regional championships earlier (silver medal won) and came back knackered but had an hour of discussion on English Lit in the car (Thank you audible) has done another two hours on English Lit on Shakespeare and a bit of maths. I am getting more concerned about burn out than him not knowing the stuff as when I help him, and he wants a lot of help, he really knows his material now. We have agreed do nothing now if it’s not before half term as he has 6 exams the first week and 5 the second.

Hi all- thank you so much for everyone who really provided support to me last night and today.

DS has picked up today. Cracked on with his work and is feeling more chipper. he said that maybe next year he will get some friends for people who are coming into the school for A-levels or IB.

I completely agree with the poster who said he might find his tribe when he is older. I know that was the case with me. We are quite similar in so many ways.

All in all a better day.

I'm so impressed with your DS @whereonthestair swimming at such a high level (and winning!) during such a stressful time. Good on him!

@Caddycat - today I bought DS some snacks for him to take to school- it hadn't occurred to me he might be too nervous to eat a proper lunch, so thanks for your post.

I'm thinking of us all on the thread- such a stressful and anxious time.

❤

Glad to hear things have picked up. DS has never found his tribe either. Onwards and upwards

It is hard when they don't find their people got a DS who also struggles he only had a few signatures on his shirt from a couple of hundred in his year. If I recall correctly he only made double figures thanks to a couple of younger kids asking to sign it!
DD is getting stressed, done a couple of passed papers and been writing up notes. Says there is not enough time!

Feeling a bit like we have mostly run out of time and stamina here too. DS1 supposedly did do 3 hours today but about half of that was staring at maths blankly so not that helpful! So we rewatched one of his drama performances online pausing regularly for him to tell me all about the lighting & props etc (and for me to point out bits he hadn’t noticed). Hopefully he will remember some of it!
Potential crisis here as I noticed that some of his early exams had been put on his online timetable- but his extra time had only been included on some of them….School has been emailed so hopefully they will sort.
Glad your DS is feeling better today @3GoldenLamps

I really feel for them. It’s a lot of pressure. And I think worse than when I was doing GCSEs many years ago.

It’s last day of school on Wednesday and signing shirts. I really have no idea how many people are likely to sign son’s shirt. He doesn’t have a lot of close friends but we’ve never really heard about friendship issues either. He’s quite self contained.

I finding myself getting anxious about my DS forthcoming GCSE's. His fine - it's me! Bloody peri-menopause!

Same feeling of running out of time... The content is insane. DD's school do the history curriculum backwards, she started with the content of paper 2 then paper 1. She was going through Elizabethan and History of medicine again yesterday, she had forgotten Paper 1 is the stuff she's done more recently... but she feels she needs to work on Paper 2 content as she hasn't looked at it fully since the November mocks...
@Walkingbkwrm I feel the stamina going here too. DD is shattered.

I feel that this shirt signing business is like an ultimate popularity contest thing and tough for those for whom school hasn't been the easiest. DD has been so lucky. She's found a group of friends on the first day of year 7 and they have had absolutely no fall out, no disagreement, nothing. They aren't the cool kids, but they have each other and I'm so grateful for it. My youngest went to Y7 with various friends from her dance school and it hasn't been plain sailing at all. There's an odd number of them, and she's always the one left behind for working in pairs or groups or picked in a PE team. School is such a lottery.

Realistically, they are pretty much out of time. There’s not much more they can be taught or learn. Sure they can cram, and there’s research which shows that’s actually pretty effective. But every single one of them is in the same boat time-wise. So whatever they’ve sown so far, they will reap. @Caddycat it sounds like your dd could not be working any harder, so she will deffo be fine.

The other thing to remember is, the cognitive load will lessen as the exams go on. After Lit Paper 1, they can offload all that Shakespeare and 19th century novel content from their short term memory. The day after, Biology can go too. They’ll have less and less to revise as each day passes. It’s not so torturous when you see it that way!

God this last week of build up already feels like a slog. My dd, and the kids I teach, just need to get started now. Roll on Monday 11th when it kicks off in earnest…