When could you identify your child’s academic potential?

[Op1n1onsPlease]

We are likely to move house within London or commuting distance in the next few years. DC1 is in Year 2 so will need to factor into secondary school for him even though it seems way too early.

At the moment I’m leaning towards finding a good comp rather than putting all our eggs in a selective basket as just less risk involved, but wondering when is the right time to make that call.

DC was an advanced baby/toddler (mainly speaking very early), but at school things have evened out and while he’s in the top handful in his state school class he’s unlikely to get greater depth across the board this year (he should in reading and maths but writing unlikely).

He’s May born so youngish in his class and doesn’t really care about schoolwork, is quite slapdash with homework etc and difficult to motivate to eg learn his times tables. This is obviously fine - he is only just 7! - but I’m wondering whether he might mature in the next couple of years or if this is just his personality.

For background DH and I both did very well academically (grammars and first class Oxbridge degrees) but were also very studious, nerdy kids which DC1 is definitely not.

I should say that private school is almost definitely not an option for us, so I’m thinking of grammar schools in London and nearby.

Aged 2 it was obvious my oldest was ahead of peers, she's in junior school now and excels accross the board, scores very highly in mock 11+ tests. My youngest seems average at aged 4. I score highly on IQ tests, went to grammar and did a very hard STEM subject at a good uni. I think I was pretty average through much of primary and never did that well with writing.

Eldest was always articulate, smart, confident and came over as super smart. His maths was always good but he had no interest in English, his comprehensions and understanding of inference was shocking, his descriptive writing was dire and most homework nights were spent lying on the floor crying,

Whilst I knew the raw materials were good, we had him assessed in year 4 as i simply couldn’t work out why he wasn’t making progress we had to abandon ideas of putting him through the London 11+ for competitive schools despite being told that he had the ability to walk into Highgate / City / UCS etc. His CAT scores were in the high 130’s. We kept up with the painful English tutoring to try at least to get him to have some idea of how to pass an English exam and suddenly, I would say, mid year 9 it clicked.

His GCSE’s were all 8’s and 9’s including both English papers. A Levels were 2 x A * and an A and he’s on track for a first from a RG uni in a writing heavy degree. He has had numerous papers published and has a grad job lined up.

I never thought middle one was anything special. We thought she was the higher side of average, yet despite a bereavement and some fairly major mental health problems she got nothing less than a 7 in her GCSE’s and AAB in her A levels. She’s at an RG uni, and she works hard and does well

Youngest is the smartest and laziest. He spoke early, nothing he tries is too hard for him, but tries is the operative word, he’ll only try when he wants to and nothing can convince him otherwise. I am sure his GCSE’s will be good and I expect a mix of outstanding, he’s already working at an 8/9 in year 10, in the subjects he likes and he’ll be lucky to pull off a 4 in the ones he deems to be a waste of time. I’d like to think I’m wrong but I doubt it.

All 3 of mine are massively curious, they’re interested in the world around them and all have a huge appetite for knowing more, they’re interested in everything from politics, to history, to train timetables, to football to music and I think it’s that curiousity which gives them the interest in always wanting to learn more.

Probably around GCSE when we got mock results but that's not much help to you. I think there were signs prior eg good SATS but then the school had pushed them so hard that I didn't really know if that was a measure of academic ability or coaching. One teacher said about my son in year 3 that he'd do well in any school. Another teacher said about my daughter in year 5 she'd be great in any job. Not much to go off is it?

They're 21 and 18 now. One's just about to do an MA after finishing at a highly rated uni and the other has an offer from Oxbridge. The one who has the Oxbridge offer lives life at 100 miles an hour, always busy and has an extraordinary work ethic. The other admits they do just enough to get by.

I'm in the north so don't know anything about London schools apart from what I've read on mumsnet so I get the impression all the comprehensives are absolute hell holes! My question is, would your kid do any better in a grammar than in a decent comp if they end up being academically able? My kids have got better exam results going through the state system than most of their friends who have gone to academic private schools or grammars.

@TheFTrain it's funny you say that, i've never lived anywhere but London and Mumsnet gives me the impression that comps outside London are hell holes 😂 London really doesn't have many grammars. 4 main ones in London- 2 girls, 1 boys, 1 co-ed but geographically all far apart. Then there's the London/ Surrey border which has a few. It sounds like a lot, but London is so huge it's easily an hour between just the North London ones. But for the most part, London has some of the best comps in the country! There's a lot of snobbery though and elbow pushing though, even between schools within one postcode. They're definitely not all hell holes though. I think it's actually quite unfair how many amazing opportunities London kids get Vs those in comps elsewhere. Sometimes I hear about someone on here saying their kids school has a 25% pass rate and all the others in their area are just as bad. I've genuinely never heard of that happening at a school anywhere in London. I'm sure someone will find one somewhere but it's incredibly rare and you wouldn't find surrounding schools being just as bad.

DD was always achieving above average at primary but didn't stand out as exceptional.
Did better than I had expected at 11+ (in top 10%) of score.
Did ok but again not top of the class good for the next couple of years but then hit her stride in year 9 and didn't stop. Finished high school with GCSE grade 9 in all bar one subject (got an 8) and now cruising through A levels. Would be surprised if she gets less than A* AA and more A *s is not out of the question. Not choosing elite university though as she has very specific requirements (also autistic)

dd (currently 21), early talker (June baby) went to a super selective school where she was average compared to her peers. Currently studying Vet Med.

ds (soon to be 19) spoke very late, lack of focus when young although a July baby. Didn’t do well in his prep school. When he joined his lovely, nurturing secondary school he started climbing sets. Despite that, he wasn’t in top set or anything. Did his GCSEs and got all 9s, got better A levels then his sister and is smashing it at a top University.

Bromley and Bexley are London boroughs with 6 grammars: 4 in Bexley and 2 in Bromley.

Dunno -- but fingers crossed for her Finals (currently happening).

As opposed to how many comps in that borough? Comps that are not hell holes

I don't think any of the secondaries are rated below Good.

Exactly

Schools are schools @Foxesandsquirrels. I've taught in lots of types including grammars and comprehensives. They all have their good points and their drawbacks. The OP's kids are very young. Who knows what school will suit them when they're actually secondary age? If she picks an area with decent transport links, where most of the schools are good, the 2011-12 baby bulge is working its way through the system so there should be plenty of places.

Unless the schools have gone bust by then which is seeming like a real possibility right now!

I'm really sorry I don't mean to be rude but I think you might've misunderstood my post lol I was replying to a pp who was saying they've always had the impression London comps are hell holes 😂

Oh, I did misunderstand that.

I took you literally.

I'm not sure you really understood my point either (that grammars are a realistic option in SE London for those that want them - although not everyone wants them nor wants to do the prep).

But anyway.

The schools are better in London mainly for two reasons: lots of kids of aspirational immigrants; and historically higher funding levels.

Sorry unless you @ me I can't see your message. I didn't misunderstand your message lol I just wasn't responding to that point. I think we're on the same page lol but we're making two completely different points 🙈.
You're right, in that area of London grammars are attainable, but they are still massively outnumbered by state schools, almost all of which are good and far from hell holes, which is the point I was making to the pp.
And yes, I agree, home life is the biggest indicator of success so it stands to reason a predominantly aspirational community will reap good academic rewards. But I also think it's accessibility to things like uni, museums etc. Uni is a completely foreign concept to many kids outside London, they will have to factor in accomodation etc if they ever want to go to one. For many kids in London, if they want to go to uni, it's down the road, and they don't have to worry about the extra costs around accomodation or even the logistics of moving there if they live in a small town with no car etc. Even after uni, they have friends and links in London, they know how to get around, they're not intimidated by the big builds for job interviews, they're surrounded by opportunities like degree apprenticeships etc. Even though so many London kids live in poverty, those are all huge privileges not given to even middle class kids outside London. And I say this as someone who grew up in London on FSM! I was shocked when I eventually visited more of England.

I'm in the north so don't know anything about London schools apart from what I've read on mumsnet so I get the impression all the comprehensives are absolute hell holes!

LOL.

They are not.

I know, I was so shocked to read that post. I'm used to the whole country hating London for getting all the funding and having the best schools!

Stay in a London borough that has no grammar schools (most don't) and buy close to a good, well established school. Most of the grammars are on the outskirts of London - Surrey or Kent for S. London and they cream off the most academic/tutored kids. If you stay in London, your local schools will have the full range of students.

@Foxesandsquirrels I was being facetious. I know there are plenty of good comps in London. I just read so many posts on here who live in London who are desperately trying to get their kids into a grammar school or private school.

Likewise, I know you know all comps outside of London are not hell holes.

I did 'summer school' with DD every year from 6 until 11 and I do think it helped, though it was very low key, and in the last summer we didn't bother with normal summer school and did detective school instead - watching an episode of Poirot every day and trying to solve the case before Poirot did

I can't do the same with DS as I work full time now but DD has suggested that she does summer school with him instead.

I posted earlier that DD doesn't put effort in anymore so academic ability can change for the worse too but she finished the school year last week top of her class (I know this because she was awarded a stipend for being top of the class) so seems she is still doing alright even without putting the effort in.

Oh sorry! Didn't pick up on it that's my bad. The elbow pushing of London schools is crazy. Of course I'm sure lots of brilliant comps exist outside London, but there's lots of pockets where people have no good options, and Londoners are spoilt for choice. It's not fair at all. London kids are hugely privileged.