Year 10 - 2023/2024 Support Thread

[QueenMabby]

Hi all

A new thread for those needing support (or just wanting to chat or rant!) with teens heading into their GCSE years.

@icanbewhatiwant the debt thing makes it all so tough. But there are so many things where they just need 'a degree' and I suspect many paths will open for him. I'm HOPING dd1 will get away without the debt as a nurse - she's planning to train in Wales which has some funding for NHS, and even in england she'd get a bursary. DD2 is another matter. It's probably music, let's be honest, but whether she's heading for conservatoire or a music degree joint with something else is another matter.

She occasionally suggests she might do something else, but given she then voluntarily spends 95pc of her time taking on more music than she should, I don't know whether she'd actually be happy unless she's fiddling about with instruments all day. Term finishes tomorrow - can't wait to have her hanging around the house even though I basically lose my office (which is her bedroom) and my living room (which turns into a sort of sheet music explosion when she's home) for the next nine weeks!

@minisnowballs the debt is huge. The actual loan was about 53k. So goodness knows what it is at now with interest. He started uni Oct. 2019 for 3 years. Ds2 is on £42k of loan so far, he's on a year abroad this year. So one more year next year, that another £16k 🤦‍♀️

@icanbewhatiwant I'd say you'd need a PhD for a "good" science job. I did a degree in chemistry and then a masters and I regret not doing a PhD. With working part time and child rearing, I feel like I've lost the opportunity to do it now. My job's in science, it's ok but not that well paid but a lot of the higher paid science jobs need a PhD, especially in academia.
Hardly any of my peers who did chemistry, did actually go on to pursue science jobs, they went into accounting, city trading, recruitment etc. A good science degree is a platform for a lot of sort after graduate schemes that's not actually science.

@DataColour ds1says biology is a bit of naff degree too. Most jobs want physics or chemistry. I'd say biology is the easier option of the sciences. I don't know what people do with a biology degree, but he's discovered he needs to go higher to work in science. But he's not going to now. He finished uni 2 years ago and not done much since. I'm sure his degree could be useful for other jobs though. I fear the longer he travels, the harder getting a good job will be.

Well we're done for the summer and DD1 is home (are we first?!) She's had a pretty good Year 10 given the massive change of school and her report was just lovely. Now we've got to just keep her motivated over the summer especially given she hasn't had an academic lesson for two weeks. She knows what she needs to work on...

Well done everyone - here's to Year 11

I think you are @minisnowballs! Dd finishes on Wednesday but then is off to Italy on music tour with school on the Thursday.

We've also had reports. All good and her teachers said some lovely things about her kindness and generosity to her peers which was lovely.

The week's been topped off by confirmation from her dance school that she's been assessed and can transition to pointe from September so could we please make an appointment and get her fitted for pointe shoes over the summer. Anyone have any idea how much these cost??

@QueenMabby excellent news re pointe shoes! No idea of the cost but it sounds expensive.

My DD is on pointe shoes. I was surprised how much her first pair cost as it’s not just the shoes but the toe pads to pay for, plus ribbons. I think we paid over £100. They don’t last very long either. You may only get 2 months out of them if she dances several times a week.

Thanks @newmum1976. Fortunately for me dd only dances once a week and not extensively. I'm definitely hoping that they last much longer than two months!

Ds3 is on work experience this week. I dropped him off for 8am start. Ds1 and ds2 have worked their summer hols from 6th form and uni. Neither are there this summer. I'm hoping it'll lead to a summer job for ds3 when he's old enough. He has to be 18. Though ds did say a couple of the girls are 17. So maybe a change of age now. He seemed to enjoy himself.

The just one more week at school next week, then that's it for year 10.

For the older 2 dc's year11 seemed to fly by. So I expect it will again.

That should have said...ds1 and ds2 worked there for their summer hols. Its been a long day 🤦‍♀️

DS had two more weeks left now.
Had another college open day today where he tried Law as one of the taster lessons but wasn’t mad on it.
No report as yet, they tend to send them out on the last day so we shall see what that brings.
Am not too sure on why happens with the GCSE he took early in terms of results, presume they email them over but who to -him or me? He won’t go in just for that one am sure.
This year had whizzed by I reckon!

Great that he gets to try new things before choosing @SB1971 ! DD2 still has no idea about which A-Levels. Her report is not illuminating on what she should do. Maybe the summer will bring some clarity - I think she's been too busy to think.

My DD is still not quite sure which A levels to do either, it feels very early to be thinking about it but we have done two sixth form open evenings in the last week. I found them quite exhausting! So many people, so many different options, a lot of information to take in.

She only has this week in school as next week is work experience so nearly at the end of year 10. Fortunately (her last ever!) sports day is tomorrow and not today as it is forecast to chuck it down today! She's really looking forward to some downtime in the holidays.

@SB1971 haven’t school given you any info re collecting his GCSE result? Some schools expect the DC to log in on the day but some email DC. Maybe ask now before they break up.
For those with DC doing work experience what type of things have they managed to secure?
DD3 officially broke up on Friday just gone but has been in Australia the last two weeks for her g’father’s funeral. So she missed the week long language trip, which she wasn’t invited on anyway as not doing a MFL gcse and the last week was just sports days, prize giving & various assemblies / zero lessons. School gave her one week authorised leave but the second was unauthorised; which I appreciate and understand. It’s also meant that she’s missed two 6th form open days but they’re repeated in October.
She received her report on Fri (last day of term) and no real surprises. She seems to be on the cusp of 6/7 for a couple of subjects and 5/6 for some others. When ppl talk of 9’s it does make 6’s sound a bit rubbish but they’re B’s which used be pretty good in my day! She’s hoping with hard work she can get the 5’s to 6’s and the 6’s to 7’s but as we all know anything can happen on the day. And yr11 will be a bit tougher. But she’s a reasonable work ethic so…

@SB1971 I keep thinking you are me as same initials as mine before I got married (not been married long) and very similar year to my birth year.

Ds2 on day 2 of work experience. With Dh. Day 1 he went to the gym. Tomorrow the whole school year is visiting the local uni.

Sounds busy @Oblomov24!

Dd finished at lunchtime today. She's off to Italy on music tour with school tomorrow. I have to drop her at 4.30am!

Anyone wish to discuss Year-10-End-of-Year-Reports? If you don't no problem.

Got ds2's yesterday. It was ok, good, ish. He's ok. Does ok in most things, solid in maths and english. He got a 6 in all sciences. coasting in 3 subjects. including PE which is his fave, so I wasn't impressed with that, because he wants to take PE alongside Biology at A'level. And a 2 in RE.
He is at a catholic school. 'How'? I said. How is that even possible. Did you learn nothing in any of the lessons. He admitted he hadn't done any revision at all, because he's been concentrating on the 3 sciences, same day for exam. But I wasn't happy. Even I could get more than a 2 in RE and I've never had RE lessons!!
(Whereas I reckon I could now almost pass a Macbeth paper!

I deliberately said little. I told him he needs to seriously 'up his game'.

I think now is a good time to have a bit of a scare @Oblomov23 . DD1 got a horrific score in RE at the end of year 10- when she memorably forgot the word muslim and instead wrote 'people who follow Islam' every single time instead - which slowed her up somewhat! I wouldn't mind, but it's an incredibly diverse school, she has many muslim friends and teachers, and we're regular churchgoers. She got a 9 in the real thing though - fingers crossed your DS will have a similar epiphany...though it was only a half GCSE anyway at DD's school so not so much to learn.

Probably saying little is the best policy - he'll know what you think.

In terms of reports, DD2's came without number grades on it. She had been given them on the exam papers themselves but for some reason we didn't get them like that. It was instead written and then with letter grades. Everything was an A or A+ so I'm assuming A is a 7 and A+ 8 and 9 - but it's hard to tell what they really mean.

Teachers mostly seem to feel she is 'driven' and 'polite' - I think this is just in context of her coming from a school where she had to manage her own time and progress if she wanted to do well and where you would have got a detention if you hadn't signed off your emails with Kind Regards.

Obviously we were very pleased with her, but it comes in the context that she's dropped three GCSEs this year because she's at music school. She doesn't even do a language, and is Combined not Triple science and no further maths.

We're aware that she's going to have to manage her GCSE workload at the same time as a LOT of music next year - they won't let up because of exams. And there's not much we can do about helping her from 100 miles away if it does go wrong - I'm already contemplating booking a hotel for the first couple of nights nearby in case of massive upset.

She has done some revision this week so far, but not masses - definitely concentrating on her favourite subjects rather than the ones she actually needs to revise!

We haven't had ours yet @Oblomov23 but we only get current performance and target grades
plus scores for behaviour, homework and class work which are Excellent, good and needs improvement alongside attendance data.
There are no comments at all just data but we get one of these at the end of every term.

DS hasn’t done too badly in his end of years so far though we are waiting for science still, better in some and worse in others in particular Spanish which he wants to do at a level. Those exams were right at the end of almost 4 weeks and he had had enough by then so will need to think about how to maintain the focus right until the end next year somehow.

It's tricky when there are DCs not trying in subjects they don't like. I'm slightly inclined to say not to worry too much - focus on why ones they need for sixth form entry - those are the key to the door. Everything else is just decoration. We had this with ds who did Spanish but hated it (compulsory to do mfl). He ended up with a 4 at GCSE despite being capable of a 6 or a 7 (got a 6 in his mock). It hasn't held him back though. I get the issue with PE @Oblomov23 though.

DD's report was good. It's tough though. In one subject her teacher put that she was "achieving as expected" having got a 9 and then "outstanding" (highest level) in homework, attentiveness in class and organisation. It's hard to feel you're doing well if the expectation is so high!

With a dc getting 9s across the board we focus on other things and my fave bits for her were these two comments:

Mini-Mabby remains humble despite her outstanding academic ability, and her peers often look to her for support, which is lovely.

And

Her circle of friends appreciates her maturity, common sense, and steadfast support.

She's currently off having a whale of a time in Italy on her school music tour. Home soon and I'll be thrilled to have her back.

Thanks to all 3.
Hmm, I'm not sure about him. I think come sept I'm going to have to monitor him more.

Aw @QueenMabby - those are lovely comments- you must be proud! Dd2’s rather wonderful ‘she has the skill of being the glue that gently brings many different characters together and her care and empathy is constant’ was tempered by ‘Im relieved to finally meet someone who breaks and loses as many things as I do’ (I sense her houseparent may also be occasionally exasperated).

My problems are with Ds at home. We've really struggled with him over the years. The school report was great though. The teachers think he's great, helpful, kind. Effort is exceptional in every subject. He got the top grade in the school for his mocks in computer science, biology, chemistry and French. I have no idea what makes him do so well, dh and I both left school at 16 so not educated at all.

Yet at home he is such hard work. He will sit eating his dinner, staring at the table, if I try to make conversation, he talks as if I'm a 2 year old that knows nothing. He literally criticises everything I say. We've had visitors all weekend, he wouldn't speak to them at all. We are going on holiday next weekend. I'm dreading it. Last year we took his best mate as the year before was a complete disaster, but taking his friend was even worse, day 1 was fine, then day 2 onwards Ds refused to talk to his mate, which continued for the whole holiday, it was embarrassing. He just walked round with his head down, wouldn't make conversation with any of us, all the time we were at the holiday house he just lay on the bed and refused to speak. So no friend this year, it's easier to deal with that behaviour with him on his own. I can't even tell him to get out of his mood because he says "I'm sorry you are do disappointed in me" and "I'm sorry you hate me do much" Also his phone only lasts 20 minutes then it's out of charge. I asked which phone he wants next, he kept saying he doesn't need a phone as 29 mins is long enough. I only buy refurbished phones for the dc's at that age. I bought his when he started year 7. So it's done well. So in the end I bought another phone for him as he wouldn't tell me what to buy next. He said he doesn't want it. His one is fine. So it's going to be great on holiday with no phone either.
I've asked him to look up places in York to visit. He says he doesn't care. He's such hard work. But school report is always brilliant.