Y7- 2023/24 support thread

[BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz]

Hi, just dropping in a thread for those of us who have kids starting secondary this coming September. There was a lovely thread going last year and they are carrying it on into Year 8, so here is a place for us the year behind.

How is everyone feeling as they finish Primary and prepare for Secondary?

Dd is moving from a single form entry "family feel" type cosy Primary into a large 8 form entry, multiple building secondary. She's going alone, her primary class are really split up across multiple secondaries.

The transition days helped, and she is excited,but has been really sad this weke saying her goodbyes

Is everyone prepped for uniform etc?

@BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz the buses are hard, even now my yr 8 gets annoyed and upset with behaviour on buses but she has got better at dealing with it, I remember it did take a while though .
DS is muddling through, homework is an issue as he doesn't seem to write it down or register its existence so that's been interesting, lots of scouring Teams each evening!

Yes dd was saying the older kids on the coach sore and were hitting each other

an hour to write 5 sentences for eng.
down to 1 homework outstanding.

And refusing to do the extra on sparx just wanting to do compulsory.

@Busornobus67 I gave up with trying to get DD1 to do the extras in sparx, hard enough to get her to do the compulsory stuff

All going ok here apart from the tiredness. Im worried about Snapchat and don’t know whether I’m being unreasonable. My dd is in a group chat with a load of other children in her year and I’ve just got a feeling it’s going to be trouble but at the same time she is hardy and sticks up for herself. Should I tell her to remove herself?

@Sweetpea84 DD isn't allowed Snapchat yet but she is on a few WhatsApp groups with the rule that she doesn't get involved in any bullying etc. She learned her lesson in Yr 6 about not joining in on group conversations as it massively backfired on her when she stuck up for a friend so now she reads them but doesn't really contribute apart from few vanilla comments now and again.

Exeat weekend so no school tomorrow 💃. Happy girl got off the bus tonight; B+ in Classics, all prep correct for maths but most importantly a good friend day with lots of laughs.
Says she is starting to feel more settled so I'm hoping I can start to relax myself now. Didn't realise how draining it has been until I had a meltdown over stubbing my toe this morning 🙄.
Hope those DC who are still finding it tough have a lovely chilled weekend and that they have a better week.

@Sweetpea84 neither of mine have Snapchat as friends who are secondary teachers told me it's known as the bullying app, and wouldn't let their own kids have it. I think if they are using it, check their phone. Though as you point out, What's App can also be used for bullying which mine do have.

• help needed! Newsletter contained a player for a.….

A European baking comp - European bakes, biscuits and cakes!

Ds said please mum we have to do it!

Any ideas what I could make? I haven't baked in two years!!!!!!

Welsh Cakes!!!
Easy and delish

My DD is exhausted and been saying she doesn’t want to go in to school each day; yet when I pick her up usually comes out laughing with other girls. Tonight it came out that the group who live locally in he class and she was travelling in with are leaving her out of everything, walking away from her and generally not engaging with her now - although last week were great friends on their residential side etc. I think it’s due to one girl (the only one from my DD’s old school) who displayed mean girl behaviour towards her over the summer who is the ring leader, whether explicitly influencing the others or just by dismissive nature they are picking up on. Not sure what to do other than advise my DD to carry on being friendly to everyone like she has been and make wider friends (which she is doing). Problem is that these girls are in her class and the wider friends aren’t… so she is feeling left out
Anyone got some sage advice on how to handle (me and her!)?

Oh that is a pain! Can you suggest to her she keeps an eye out for any girls in any of her classes who never seem to talk to anyone? She could approach them and ask to sit together at lunch or to walk to the next class together?

Thanks @BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz that’s a good suggestion as this core group isn’t all the class, they just seem to dominate and rule the class WhatsApp etc (although reading the WhatsApp thread it’s such inane crap they are posting I’m glad my DD isn’t really joining in! 😳). So, yes, I’ll tell her to look out for others in her class who are on the periphery too.

Well it’s the weeeknd 🙌 . DD looks grey with exhaustion and has broke out in a load of spots. Hard to know if it’s school, hormones or possibly just both. Fun times!

Happy weekend! DD is tired and in a foul fettle. Really looking forward to trying to get her to do homework this afternoon. She has science and geography due on Monday and is with her grandparents all day tomorrow so it really needs to be done today 🙄

Thankfully they're not making us bake but they are definitely going all out for European Day of Languages in other ways.

My go-to Austrian biscuits all have almond flour in them so I assume would be verboten at school...

DS seems to be really enjoying Spanish which I'm relieved about. He'd wanted to do French (his best friend is French and we visit France loads) but he's embracing being taught a language more methodically than they get in primary.

He's still finding the transition between classes really overwhelming. For some reason they don't stay in their form for any lessons so he'll be in a different English class than the rest of his form, etc, so they can't just move between classes as a group. I'll admit it's thrown me quite a bit, I assumed they'd be in their forms for anything that isn't set.

@JassyRadlett

I presumed the same also. To make it even more overwhelming they split the lunchtime into two. So you’re either on first lunch or second lunch. My DD has made a friend she really likes but is only able to see her if they have the same lunch because it changes daily depending on her timetable. Personally I would have really disliked that at school as I wouldn’t have wanted to have been split up from my little tribe.

I wonder why they do it? It feels like it must make timetabling even more of a nightmare as well as increasing the complexity for the kids....

@JassyRadlett

I don’t know and I work in schools albeit in a pastoral role.

The lunch thing at my own child’s school is most probably a canteen capacity issue but it’s definitely not helping. I have a son in year 9 and I asked him what he does when he’s not on lunch with his two best friends. He just said oh I just go and see who’s playing football.

It will be more difficult for my DD to just rub alongside others I think. She likes to stick to one or two friends only but I guess they’re all in the same boat. Perhaps it might encourage more friends in the long term.

@Yoyo2021 Hungarian biscuits. Easy, tasty, nut free in case that's something you have to be careful of.

@Itslosenotloose 2 lunch times sounds crazy. My DDs school has 1st and second lunch, but that's only to facilitate loads of clubs, all girls are free the entire time. DSs school has staggered cafeteria times but again, they're all on lunch break the entire time, it's just to avoid a mad rush for catering staff.

Hope everyone's having a good weekend, this is the 1st one we've had where declarations of 'never going back to school' haven't been made, so definite progress thank goodness. DS has completed all the homework and having time to relax. He is actually even doing some extra Latin on an app in a bid to impress his Latin teacher whom he really likes!

Wow @ElvenDreamer extra homework, that’s very keen. Here we had screaming and tears again but DS2’s homework is now done (don’t mention DS1’s, that’s um - not). So now he is planning chilled out computer/tv time for the rest of the weekend- I haven’t decided whether I am leaving him to it or chasing him outdoors for a bit.
Mine have split lunch by year group and canteen slots this year - so yr7, 8 and 9 have lunch first and then the older ones have a different lunch break. Different each day depending on your own timetable sounds insanely complicated. Mind you since DS1 started we have had 3 different arrangements in 3 years so I suspect it’s finding the least bad arrangement.

@Walkingbkwrm we've had the shouting and ranting about homework. DD wanted me to sit with her and help, then got annoyed I was helping. Then got annoyed when I sat and scrolled my phone not helping her. Then got annoyed when I pointed out the question warranted more than one sentence for the answer. It's just like home learning all over again.

I've told exH he has to do the science with her this eve as I feel like I need a double vodka and some prozac after 15 mins spent on the geography 🤯

@Walkingbkwrm I don't expect it to last, and believe me we've had the tears and tantrums too, I'll take any little positive!

Got dd's adhd questionaires through but just says give to senco which would be pointless as shes only had 10d at secondary so will have to call and see if i can give to primary to complete.
would those with diagnoses agree it would nt be representative so early?
(It would ignore lots of primary issues. Though even then dd teacher left and they also dud no work since may..

i wouldnt say dd is masking. - shes having friendship issues and im organising her work and bag and walking her to school bus.
But shes less distracted in class as she knows none of the kids and doesnt talk to them.
And physically less impulsive as that was usually about classmates too. And really that at school -well what primary tell me about was maybe a few issues a year.

Basically her asd traits are impeding her adhd.

Some of her previous y6 have had detention at their new school, fighting for one with older kids and the other disrupting class and organisation - not bringing correct books.

So far dd has had 0 negatives and 2 positives (history and d&t). Obviously i dont know other kids might have loads of positives.

Residential went ok, he came back shattered and dirty, having not showered despite falling in the lake raft building🤦‍♀️🤣 He’s now mentioning quite a few new ones as friends as well as his Junior school gang who all moved up together.

Maths, French and the start of a big Biology project have happened this weekend without tears, so that’s progress!

He absolutely loved rowing club.

Does anyone else have a child at school who are obsessed with a certain sport? DS school is all rugby. 2 lessons a week plus clubs, including Saturday morning. DS absolutely hates rugby (plus it’s really dangerous) and the pressure to play is a lot! Plus he’s dyspraxic and will never make a ball player. He likes golf because the ball is still when you hit it! Any tips on how to opt out?

@HalfasleepChrisintheMorning DDs school is extremely sports orientated ie hockey practice/matches Saturday afternoons after 6 1/2 long days at school. Thankfully she has riding + Pony Club on Saturday g afternoon so these get her out of the additional hockey.
I had to get permission to enable her to not attend though 🙄. Can you just make up participation in another sport or hobby outside of school?