Have we got a year 7 support thread this year?

[KangarooLady]

Hi all! DD1 is starting secondary this year! She's very nervous about the travel (train and bus) but definitely looking forward to it . Any other new year 7s?

You are wise Mumsnetters. The things you’ve said are all far superior to what we managed BUT I will use your wise words and thoughts. Thank you. It’s much appreciated.

As with all these things there is baggage attached but that’s a parental thing and the kids don’t need to know. As I’m I’ve worked out who this child is. But also it’s the sort of thing that happened to me at a school but DD hasn’t ever really come across it before.

@TryAnotherNickname I’m so sorry for your DD but you’ve handled it well and we’ve raised resilient daughters who went back in for another day.

Hi - new to the thread. Feeling gutted as DD's first day at secondary school was horrible and she spent whole evening in tears when she came home. She's been looking forward to going since March, and we knew the school was going to be a stretch for her academically but thought it was the right choice. Now - I don't know. She said all the girls were on their fancy smartphones texting all day, even during lessons. She tried to say hello and draw people into conversation but people just ignored her and kept texting. In the halls there was a lot of jostling and she said kicking and elbowing of older girls to younger. Then they started off lessons with triple French (nightmare!) and then she got yelled at by a teacher for getting lost in the one-way Covid system, then there was a problem with the bus, and anyway... needless to say not the start we were hoping for and she looked utterly miserable when she went in today despite lots of talk last night of 'the first day is always hard' and 'other people are nervous too' and 'tomorrow will be different'. I take some of her account with a grain of salt, and there's a part of me that wants to tell her to toughen up, but it was awful to see her so utterly miserable. So I hope today goes better, but it's really gutting as a parent to see their (probably unrealistic) illusions shattered.

Drop off for first day of school all good. He was excited and happy.

Just had a phonecall from class teacher because lunch time all went a bit wrong. School normally requires all pupils to have school lunch and strongly discourages packed lunch. However we were OK with this because the school lunches include enough variety that DS - who has food anxiety issues and ASD - felt able to cope. They didn't tell us that normal provision is completely changed (due to Covid obviously) and they will not be offering their normal choices but instead each class has one or 2 days a week going to each of 3 different lunch venues each of which will be serving one type of the normal variety (one location doing traditional hot meals, one doing jacket potatoes, one doing panini/sandwiches) so on a particular day there isn't a choice and you can't have the option that is scheduled for another class to have.

It would have been so helpful to have been told this!

But never mind. Only another hour till I can go and pick him up.

So sorry to all those who had a bad first day - why are some kids so horrible?? Must be such a worry, I hope things have gone better today for all your daughters

A happier day today - four new friends and fish n chips for lunch! Phew.

@TryAnotherNickname, @Meadowood and @MoverOfPaper, were your DD's days better today?

Sorry to read about the disappointing first day's, why do some kids treat others like that?
Not a great day for either of mine.
Son 1 - he's got a wheelchair with the handles pushed in, people still keep moving him around like he's luggage. Not sure how to tackle that one.
Son 2 - a big kid moved him out of the way using his bag, I just told him to stay out of the bigger kids way for now.

Oh gosh, I’m feeling ragey about schools not even thinking about the equality impact of their Covid changes.
I’m also feeling ragey about kids being on their posh phones and being insolent little beings.
I think my rage-o meter needs adjusting.

A bitter today on that similar stuff happened but DD I’d beginning to learn that sometimes you have to be with people that exhibite awful behaviour and as a child you have little power to do anything about it. I’m not sure that’s what education is for. Keeping an eye on it. May go on waiting lists or just give up and let her Minecraft til she’s 18.

• a better day today in that...

I think my ds school (secondary) has got the measure of these kids on their fancy phones all summer. New rule: no phones or devices at all in school. On or off. Spotted and immediate internal exclusion. That made them sit up and take notice!! My son will be leaving his at home.. he walks home.

Not a good day for dd1 today after a nice start on Wednesday 🙁 Mainly down to disorganisation of staff 🙄 Have already emailed the Head of Year to discuss my concerns 😬

@KangarooLady
Thanks so much for asking! Yes, it seemed to go a little better, largely thanks to a funny food tech teacher - whatever works! She also sat with people from her house at lunch and that seemed to work out OK. So it's still very early days, but at least I'll hopefully avoid another sleepless night over it - until next week anyway. I hope things went well for the others who are struggling.

Oh no, sorry to read about bad first days hugs to you all and your DC - hopefully it will get better.

@Meredusoleil

Not a good day for dd1 today after a nice start on Wednesday 🙁 Mainly down to disorganisation of staff 🙄 Have already emailed the Head of Year to discuss my concerns 😬

Already?! Was your child physically at risk? Surely you could give them a couple of days to settle before being that parent?

Schools are struggling to get their heads round the last minute DfE advice released on Covid as well as adjusting to the new intake and all that warrants, so unless it was a really serious safeguarding issue I'd give them some slack and at least a week before firing off emails!

I was expecting a comment like that from someone. I'm a teacher myself, so I know full well what schools have been having to deal with, thank you very much.

FYI, in my email, I simply said I had some concerns and wanted to discuss them with the school... Hope that's OK with you?

I wasn't actually being critical, it was more an observation that it's a bit premature to email with concerns when the schools have just opened in very trying circumstances. As a teacher I would've thought that would make you less inclined.

So sorry to hear about the disappointing first days. DS starts on Wed and we had an email last night to say they have to come in their games kit for games days (Mon, Wed, Fri) , including the first day of school as they don't want them changing in school, so they actually get to wear their school uniform twice a week. They have a very long list of games kit and I couldn't figure out exactly what they needed to wear which made me anxious last night, but thankfully there is a WhatsApp group set up for Yr 7 parents and some people have been able to shed more light on what to wear.
DS is looking forward to meeting some of his new classmates later today as a meet-up has been organised at a park near the school. I'll get to meet some of the parents too.

@Longwhiskers14

I wasn't actually being critical, it was more an observation that it's a bit premature to email with concerns when the schools have just opened in very trying circumstances. As a teacher I would've thought that would make you less inclined.

It's the opposite actually! As I have seen how much planning and preparation has gone into getting my own school ready to welcome the children back, I know it can be done well with good organisation. Dd1's school is falling short by those standards, but they may just be teething problems of the first days. I just want to find out a bit more about the situation to see what they've put in place to avoid a repetition of those issues.

Sorry to hear kids are having tough times. Wondering if I could get some opinions please?

DS started Wednesday. All was good the first two days. On the third day one of the girls in his class started following him around. She followed him for the whole of lunch and break and on three different occasions tried to grab him to hug him. One time she succeeded and she had to be removed by DS's friend. DS is pretty small for his age so good chance this girl is physically bigger.

My best guess (although obviously I don't know) is this girl isn't NT as it seems like very odd behaviour for an NT 11 year old. I've dropped a note to the school as I wanted to nip this behaviour in the bud. But, I just wanted some advice on what to tell my son to do if this behaviour repeats itself on Monday.

@alliejay81 sounds like a reasonable conclusion...either way it's not ok. Maybe coach your DS to gently but firmly say and repeat that it's not OK? And that he's going to have to report it if she doesn't stop?

It's good that you reported it and not a bad idea for him to discreetly report it if he's comfortable too. Because worse could happen if it continues -- e.g. a situation in which there is pushing back and forth and he is held responsible because he is the boy and NT.

I know it’s a “how long is a piece of string” question but I’m going to ask it anyway as my mind needs to plan.

How long do YOU think the restrictions will be in place? DDs school is having to be very restrictive due to its size and another irritating reason. The other local schools lead so. If they’re in the same 3 classrooms with the same 30 kids with no outside break or lunch times and it goes on until...half term,Christmas, next year ...I’d think about trying to move her.

[quote BoudiccaAnn]@alliejay81 sounds like a reasonable conclusion...either way it's not ok. Maybe coach your DS to gently but firmly say and repeat that it's not OK? And that he's going to have to report it if she doesn't stop?

It's good that you reported it and not a bad idea for him to discreetly report it if he's comfortable too. Because worse could happen if it continues -- e.g. a situation in which there is pushing back and forth and he is held responsible because he is the boy and NT.[/quote]
Thanks, that's my worry too.

If anything did happen (for example, if he pushed her off), at least I've "logged it".

It's just such a weird issue to come up so early on in the year!

@MoverOfPaper in my mind it's all about getting through the winter months. If we can make it through Dec / Jan / Feb while keeping the number of deaths low...maybe there will be further easing in many schools next spring?

Sounds rough not to have breaks outside in the meantime though!!! I thought the idea was that in general outdoor activities are better than indoor. Personally I worry about poor ventilation in classrooms and a lot of places.

Hopefully they offer outdoor PE and keep them moving at the very least?!

@MoverOfPaper I'm hoping things will start to improve after January/February. Are they not getting outside at all? That's really crappy especially while the weather is still okay.

@alliejay81 I think you've defo done the right thing by logging it with the school, hopefully it's a one off. How strange