Indie vs “super state”

[Paribus]

Wr are very fortunate in that our DD got 4 offers from indies (FHSS, Queen’s Gate, Queen’s college and G&L) and were trying to pick up the best for her- however today she (out of the blue!!) got an offer from Grey Coat Hospital School as well.
We are truly baffled and don’t know where to start. Our kids have always been privately educated, we are expats so don’t onow an awful lot about state schools here.
What would you do? Independent? “Super state”?? Is GCHS really that great?? Please, please help!! Any advice will be so gratefully received!

"The only thing that matters in the end of the day is leavers destinations"

Yes, leaver destinations are important, but also so is having a happy enough 7 years (or 5 if you change for 6th form). If your dd feels she'ill be happy at gch then that is a very good indication that it's the right place. How does dd rate it against the other three (after g & l is ruled out)?

@hairquestions2019, she is very, very excited but she’s still very young and has ratter idealistic picture i’m afraid. We as parents see it differently but her happiness is really our priority. We do worry as we really don’t know what to expect from a state school but are very grateful that we were given a chance to try iykwim?

Agree with PPs saying G&L not nurturing - I have several friends with daughters there and I know a teacher there and all report back about the lack of nurturing. It is just all about the results to the exclusion of all other ingredients necessary to produce a happy and confident child.

OP if you do go state, you will not be the only parent there who could have gone private but chose not to. These seriously good state schools are packed with such families, so I don't think it will be as 'other' as you seem to fear.

Thank you- i really hope our DD will be happy there!

Read this thread again from the beginning.
Bizarre that it should end with negative comments about G&L from people with second hand experience of the school, and from the OP!
A thread to be viewed with scepticism.

But what motive?

Indeed! With apologies @Utility, really rather an odd comment

@utility, i just shared what i heard from the parents of the school plus my own feelings of it when we visited (4 times). Anyway, this thread has nothing to do with G&L per se, it was just a commemt in the passing with no hidden motives on my side!

Apologies.
Reading through, I just couldn't understand why the thread was necessary if you didn't like one of the schools.
I am sure GCH will be brilliant and definitely the right choice.

@Growingboys I agree entirely. Our DD has become really good friends with a girl who's joined their school from a local prep that her brother still goes to and there are plenty of others like her at DDs school, which wouldn't be classed as a super state but it is v good and I think people see that. Also being in London you can pretty much supplement anything. I've always preferred it this anyway as I don't see why I should be paying through the nose for things my child isn't likely to use. All of those extra clubs are only great if your kid will actually use them.

The only negative thing id mention, and I'm sure this happens at privates too, is that you do get these children who obv could've gone private and they know this and can sometimes act in a way that makes everyone aware of this fact.
Obv not all of them but if this is something you're trying to leave behind in the private sector than its likely to be there at these state schools too unfortunately.

@malmontar, tbh i guess we are trying to leave indifference behind. May be we were particularly unlucky but we just did not feel that teachers were genuinely interested in the progress/wellbeing of the children. The reality of private schooling did not live up to our expectations unfortunately. I just hope it is different in state sector.

Being a teacher is really really hard now but we definitely feel like the teachers care. I am concerned at how overworked they are when they reply to my emails at ungodly hours though. Haven't been in the private sector personally but as with state, I'm sure it differs school to school.
I think you will also find that they care A LOT more in secondary school. That's been our experience of it anyway, and we didn't go to a bad primary.

It’s interesting...personally we found the difference between our own local state secondary and private secondaries my DCs now go to, huge. I am not British and we don’t have private schools in my country so we embraced our local schools here in london and really wanted it to work (primary state was amazing by the way!). But our local state secondary was not a good experience for us sadly. Huge forms, little sports, little after school activities and Stretched teaching facilities. To be honest I am so impressed with the opportunities that my DC have had at their private secondary. Lucky lucky kids....I hope they appreciate it as it’s been a huge sacrifice for us financially and I wish I had had half of those opportunities myself! Of course not all state secondaries are the same and there are some unbelievably good ones too. Just sadly not our local one. But in terms of opportunities to try new things and really push themselves academically it has so far for us been a great experience for us (3 DC at 3 different secondary schools) One of the secondaries is one mentioned my the OP and I have nothing but great things to say about it!

Actually correction....it’s not one of the schools mentioned by OP!

@volpemum I spoke with my DDs friends mum who had the opposite experience. She moved her kids from state primary to prep as the state was crap.
It really does come down to local provision though because they decided that with the local secondaries being so good, there's no point in going private at that stage. They're very happy with their choice and there's quite a few prep school kids in my DDs year.
The good/bad school happens in both sectors.

Thank you ladies, great to have the conversation going :).
@volpemum, i agree that most state schools wouldn’t have the private schools’ facilities but guess it is different for GC? The facilities of Holland Park, for example, have by far exceeded the facilies of Queen’s college for example, which has the tiniest possible old building at Harley st. So it really depends on the school- as always!

Re clubs- my DC never went to any and they always had loads of extracurricular activities outside but again it really depends on personal circumstances/choices!
One thing I would love to have are inspiring caring teachers which can help my DD to develop and keep that natural curiosity going. If GC can do, I shall be eternally grateful.

No idea what you're on about @Utility

Interesting @Malmontar I think you're right. Although in DS' 'super' London state the cockiest boys seem to be the handsome ones who are good at sport!

Agree you can 'top up' easily and we do. I pay for a tutor in a couple of subjects and he does extra curricular sports at the weekend. Still way cheaper than school fees though!

Hi all,
I know this is not an active thread, but you seem to have knowledge of GCH school having been through admissions process. Do you please know how far down their admissions criteria they reach for church (non-CofE specifically if you know, if not CofE would be useful too) places? Ie do they ever reach category B - weekly attendance for between 2&5 years or is it filled with category A - weekly attendance for >5 years? If all filled with category A, any idea about distance cut offs please? All I can find is indicative distances for open places. Thanks all

Hello you mention grey coats and sacred heart - do you know what they are like? I know one in Catholic and one COE but i
apart for results - what are the stand out differences?

@Nkmama15 this thread is over five years old. Mumsnet normally warns about 'zombie' threads when replying to an old thread, but maybe this wasn't working for you.

I recommend you start a new thread, mentioning the schools you're interested in in the title. Otherwise, people may reply to the original question on this thread.