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Original poster

DD doesnt want to go to Prom.

65 replies

Nerdcc · 03/10/2019 21:22

I know it is early...

My DD is in Year 11. She has told me she doesnt want to go to her Prom. What do I do as I want her to go. She will be leaving that school and it hasn't been the easiest for her.

OP posts:
WoollyMummoth · 03/10/2019 21:26

It’s basically a disco in an exorbitantly expensive dress, with the addition expense of hair, makeup,bag,shoes and overpriced flash car to get you there. My daughter went last year and pointed out it would have been better to just have a ‘ normal’ disco. If she doesn’t want to go you’re on to a winner.

pikapikachu · 03/10/2019 21:26

Discuss it later in the year. Lots of people are meh about it right now and change their minds once their friends start to get excited.

Personally I think that you need to respect her decision (by say April ) because you forcing her to go will be one of those moments that she'll always remember for the worst reasons.

dancinginthekitchen · 03/10/2019 21:30

Maybe that’s why she doesn’t want to go? My eldest had a tough time at school and he didn’t go to his prom. It would have been been miserable evening for him, instead we had a celebratory meal at home. He didn’t regret it.
If I were you I would support your daughter, let her decide how she wants to celebrate her milestone.

Thenotes · 03/10/2019 21:30

Why is it so important to you that she goes? That's the real issue here.

DS1 went to his and wished he hadn't just because it was "boring", not is thing . DS2 didn't and is happy he made the right choice.

If she doesn't want to go, save the ridiculous amount of money and let her do something else to celebrate the end of yr11

Teachermaths · 03/10/2019 21:32

Why would you make her go?

Let her stay at home. It's her night not yours.

funmummy48 · 03/10/2019 21:34

My eldest DD didn't want to go and there was no point in my trying to force her. It wasn't about me, it was about her. She went out for a meal with friends instead. Youngest DD went and had an amazing time. It was for them to decide.

corlan · 03/10/2019 21:34

Lots of students don't go to the prom for lots of different reasons. Why do you feel it's a problem?

martingoresnipplechain · 03/10/2019 21:35

I didn't go to my prom and I absolutely don't regret it. It was unbelievably expensive and not my scene at all. Don't push her to go if she doesn't want to - it's really not the be all and end all.

RedskyLastNight · 03/10/2019 21:36

Why do you want her to go? She can celebrate leaving the school in some other way.

CornishButNotBeachLover · 03/10/2019 21:36

It's not your decision to make.

LIZS · 03/10/2019 21:36

Surely you don't need to decide now. Let her focus on gcses.

chillandrelax · 03/10/2019 21:54

How much are the tickets? You could buy a ticket In case she changes her mind. I can imagine one of mine not wanting to go, I think it should be her choice.

Drabarni · 03/10/2019 21:59

Good for her, they are just an expensive night out with people you won't have anything more to do with.
I don't blame her tbh, they are so overrated. Give her the money it would have cost and let her do something else to mark the end of her GCSE's
My dd school have a doo after A levels, it's a huge affair but doesn't cost anything.

FearOfTheDuck · 03/10/2019 22:01

It's up to her. If she doesn't want to go, she doesn't have to.

People are different. School proms are great fun for some and completely unappealing to others. Let her make her own decisions on this sort of thing.

allthegoodusernameshavegone · 03/10/2019 22:04

I’m with your DD on this proms are hideous, what a waste of money, let her leave school gracefully and move on to the next exciting chapter in her life and not follow the crowd

rainbowlou · 03/10/2019 22:06

I don’t understand why you wanting her to go is so important? Mine didn’t want to go so she didn’t and it was nothing to do with me!

BackOnceAgainWithABurnerEmail · 03/10/2019 22:08

I’d just be nonchalant at this point. She doesn’t need to decide for ages. She just needs to know that past a certain point she won’t be able to change her mind (for ticket and dress finding reasons).

BubblesBuddy · 03/10/2019 23:27

Rather tawdry American import. I wouldn’t force her to go. Have a family weekend somewhere instead.

italianfiat · 03/10/2019 23:29

What do I do

You say 'ok dear, don't worry about it'

as I want her to go.

Well it's not up to you. Why do you want her to go? What difference does it make to you?

HeddaGarbled · 03/10/2019 23:35

Why do you want her to go? I don’t know why things have been difficult for her but if she is socially isolated, it could be excruciatingly awful for her.

BackforGood · 03/10/2019 23:43

I do't get it.
Why would you want her to go ? Confused

My dd1 didn't go. Wasn't her 'thing'.
Fine by me. In fact, nothing to do with me.

She chose not to go and she didn't go. the end.

hotdogwoof · 03/10/2019 23:46

I didn't go to mine. I went out for dinner with my family instead.

Cazza17 · 04/10/2019 00:04

don't try and live your life through her. She doesn't want to go. mine was 30 seconds walk from my house and I still wasn't interested. its a personal preference

starfishmummy · 04/10/2019 00:10

What do I do as I want her to go.

Surely the important thing is that she doesnt want to go!!

Roozy123 · 04/10/2019 00:13

It's up to her it's her prom.

I didn't want to go to mine.. so I didn't..
If my mum had wanted me to go.. I still wouldn't have gone.

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