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Secondary education

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Original poster

silly school rules

50 replies

simms1 · 23/06/2019 08:52

My son came home on Friday with a detention for repeatedly floating the school uniform rules. I can understand if he was walking around school refusing to put his tie on, but detention for having his top button undone and shirt untucked in my opinion is ridiculous. My son leaves the house looking smart but I don't ask his to fasten his top button, that's up to him. Do other school adopt a similar draconian approach. My opinion is schools should concentrate on improving teaching standards rather than the way someone looks.

OP posts:
HennyPennyHorror · 23/06/2019 08:54

Well it's not up to him re. his top button...not if it's a rule!

Tucking your shirt in is basic stuff. YABU.

GreenTulips · 23/06/2019 08:55

One young lady here had a detention because her jacket sleeve was slightly turned over, not on purpose! Otherwise good all round student.

Top buttons have been cut off shirts by the kids to avoid doing them up

I think if you wouldn’t be in trouble at work for X offense why would it happen at school? Things have gone too far

noblegiraffe · 23/06/2019 08:57

What is it with these threads recently? Was he also put in an isolation booth and immured from the world?

OP it’s not hard to tuck your shirt in and do your tie up so have a word with your DS and he won’t get any more detentions.

creamofcarnation · 23/06/2019 08:58

Tuck your shirt in, sorted. Is there some weird school rules troll knocking about at the moment ?

MarchingFrogs · 23/06/2019 09:34

My son leaves the house looking smart but I don't ask his to fasten his top button, that's up to him

That's absolutely fair enough - and now he knows that the school requires him to do it up and that he can either choose to do so, or choose not to and endure the sanction. It's a bit tough on him if the requirement is only stated in the parents' version of the uniform details and you have omitted to apprise him of the fact, but ime secondary schools usually have some kind of handbook / uniform card for the students.

If his tie was neatly tied, might his undone top button have gone unnoticed, had he not drawn attention to himself with the untucked shirt? Given the stage of the school year, are his shirts a bit tight in the collar? It's a pain having to buy new for the last few weeks of the year, but if he is flouting the rules through discomfort rather than defiance, it's equally a bit mean not to.

hormonesorDHbeingadick · 23/06/2019 09:36

The problem is not so much him not having his shirt untucked but the fact that he has repeatedly ignored staff when told to tuck it in. What do you think should happen when students repeatedly ignore staff when they are asking them to follow the same rules as everyone else?

lazylinguist · 23/06/2019 09:40

He knows the rules. If he deliberately flouts them, he knows the consequences. It's not exactly difficult to tuck your shirt in and do your top button up, is it? Plenty of jobs also have fairly prescriptive dress codes.

Oh and schools do 'concentrate on improving teaching standards'. Oddly enough, having rules about other things does not prevent that. It's not either/or.

BeyondMyWits · 23/06/2019 09:41

Follow the rules or endure the sanctions... or he could join the school council (most schools have them) and campaign to change the rules from the inside if he is bothered.

Not exactly "Draconian" expecting kids to look neat and tidy, then making an easy to follow rule and expecting it to be followed.

Todaythiscouldbe · 23/06/2019 09:44

'Repeatedly' is the clue here. One warning then sanctions at our school. It's hardly draconian to expect students to follow rules

BlackForestChateau · 23/06/2019 09:47

Hear me out on this one...

If an adult had a tie on, but tied so that you could see the top button was undone, would you think that looked tidy?

If an adult was wearing smart trousers and a shirt and tie, but the shirt was untucked, would you think they looked properly dressed?

Now put the two images together. Imagine a work colleague turning up like this. If their boss asked them to tidy up a bit, would you expect them to make the effort? What if they were repeatedly asked but refused by not acting on it?

By not explaining that if you want to be part of something you have to be aware of the rules that allow you to stay, we are not preparing our kids for the world of work. One day, they might have a job where they can dress as they like, but it's highly likely they'll be in stricter places first.

TheFirstOHN · 23/06/2019 09:50

There's a new thread started about this (or isolation booths) every few days at the moment; it seems to be the topic of the summer.

We haven't had a thread about plimsolls for a long time.

crapcrap · 23/06/2019 09:51

School rules are there for a reason. Your son is representing that school when he's walking around in that uniform. Doesn't make a good impression on that school if he's walking around looking scruffy.
Parents should be working with the school, not labelling the rules silly, even if you don't agree with them.

urbanmist · 23/06/2019 09:55

The detention is for deliberate defiance.

School rules are there to teach children that they can’t do what they want and ignore authority, no matter how petty it may seem. It’s not just about the learning in the classroom.
For the kids who don’t have any boundaries instilled at home, this is crucial.

Iwantacookie · 23/06/2019 09:57

Having the top button done up on a shirt especially in this weather is horrible and uncomfortable. You can't see it behind a tie so I don't really see the issue there.
Shirt untucked is neither here nor there. If he got detention the first time he was asked to tuck it in that's harsh but if he was repeatedly asked I can see why they gave him detention.

BlackForestChateau · 23/06/2019 10:04

You can't see it behind a tie so I don't really see the issue there.

I suspect they could see it because the tie wasn't done up properly either. They wouldn't have asked him to remove his tie to check - these are things thst are picked up on sight.

Cordyline1 · 23/06/2019 10:10

If he does his top button up and tucks his shirt in he won't get detentions. Next!

BarbarianMum · 24/06/2019 07:50

He "refused" to put his tie on when asked. What else does he refuse to do? Of course he was a sanctioned, no school is going to tolerate your little darling flouting the rules.

GreenTulips · 24/06/2019 07:54

The detention is for deliberate defiance

No that’s not how it works here

BarbarianMum · 24/06/2019 07:57

Is ""here" the same school as the OPs son then Greentulips?

LolaSmiles · 24/06/2019 08:00

OP
You have taken a sensible approach in that you've kitted your child out in the uniform and got them wearing the uniform properly. You're also correct in that what he does after that point is on him.

Students push at uniform rules. Twas ever thus. We did the same at school.

Bottom line is that having a shirt tucked in a fairly standard school rule that I remember being pulled up on as a teen. If teens choose to push the rules and wear the uniform wrong they are accepting the sanction that comes with it and need to get over it.

I agree with other posters. There seems to be an influx of 'child sanctioned for not following simple uniform/not following basic rules' threads at the moment.

HarveySchlumpfenburger · 24/06/2019 08:02

My opinion is schools should concentrate on improving teaching standards rather than the way someone looks

Ensuring that all children are following the rules, even the ones they don’t think apply to them is improving teaching standards.

And you are right it is up to him. He repeatedly chose to flout the rule presumably knowing that detention would be a consequence. He chose to take a detention rather than just do his top button up so he just needs to suck it up really.

AuntieStella · 24/06/2019 08:03

It's the 'repeatedly' bit that will have got the detention.

Yes, our school has a similar system, and you need to have been caught 3 times for a lunchtime detention, and after two lunchtime detentions, it's an evening one.

It is not that difficult to wear clothes in the normal way (assuming they fit).

I have a DD who is regularly on the edge of uniform rules (skirt rolling mainly, but other breaches too). I have told her that it's her own choice, the school rules are clear and I have equipped her properly. If she then does things that get penalties it's her own silly fault.

If she got repeated penalties, I would be telling her it really is her own incredibly silly fault and to take the consequences.

WhiteDust · 24/06/2019 08:43

detention for repeatedly floating the school uniform rules.

They're sick of telling him to tuck shirt in, put tie on properly.
Your DS needs to sort himself out.

DarlingOscar · 24/06/2019 12:32

why the food of these posts?

your kid is at this school and has to abide by its rules. he knows what the rules are and hasn't complied. the school have their reasons for their policies - if parents want to question this then they should follow up directly with the staff responsible, not retrospectively question the punishments/policy on here.

you cannot compare a school to a workplace - no one expects to treat adult employees as if they are children so why should children be treated as though they are independent adults?

DarlingOscar · 24/06/2019 12:33

apologies - why the flood of these posts?

your kid is at this school and has to abide by its rules. he knows what the rules are and hasn't complied. the school have their reasons for their policies - if parents want to question this then they should follow up directly with the staff responsible, not retrospectively question the punishments/policy on here.

you cannot compare a school to a workplace - no one expects to treat adult employees as if they are children so why should children be treated as though they are independent adults?