Why do people openly criticise decisions to send your kids to a private school?

[scotmum1977]

I sent my Son to a private school (Glasgow) last year for various reasons and it's working out really well. There is the cost but we just do without expensive holidays etc. I can't think of a better gift for my children than a good education. I was so surprised at how offended people get when they ask which school he attends. They think it's ok to criticise you openly and make bitchy comments here and there. Surely how you spend your own money is your own business. Anyone else have this experience?

Scotmum- but the point is- your kids are being given a position of privilege their peers may not have. It is a complex issue and I am trying to explain some of the nuances of it as to why people may make comments you don’t like.

It’s typical of someone who is not Scottish to think that posh jock accents are criticised for being a sign of English oppression.

Yes, we have been oppressed by the English, but we have a long and proud history of being oppressed by posh Scottish wankers as well.

Ruffina- it’s not so much elitist as being English sounding in general in a city which voted to leave the union.

Flossietoot "accents immediately mark out your social class in Scotland" another generalisation about Scotland - along with your comments on Glasgow being poverty stricken full of large Irish families obsessed with the old firm and Edinburgh private school kids having "English twangs". I can't honestly see why you are offending so many people on here!

Dr- yes- but the undercurrent is one of oppression based on money! Whether it is a Scottish lord or an English one, and the vast majority of parents at private schools will be pro union.

How exactly do accents not mark out your social class??!

We could afford to send our son to private school but I believe you need to choose what's the best fit for them.
Private schools can be much smaller. The one near to us were 8 in some lessons.
Our son really disliked the idea. He thought there wasn't going to be anywhere to hide if he didn't get on with the other kids.
He is doing great in the local comprehensive. There are all walks of life.
I don't believe the education is superior in all private schools but certainly they get more attention.
I personally can't judge anyone because we are all trying to do the best we can for our kids.

That’s the point; Kirsty isn’t working class. But she is a posh Scot.

By your own reckoning, her private education has given her a twang; her glottal stops are a sign of English oppression! She does not fit into the narrative that we are a nation of working class heroes and posh pseudo- English wannabes.

Taxi to Craiglang for Flossie!

Flossietoot no you are issuing insults at me throughout this thread, criticising Glasgow, Edinburgh accents and Scotland in general claiming you can make these comments because you worked in "three of the most deprived areas in Scotland whilst living in the most affluent". I'm sorry but that is insulting and you come across as a snob boasting about where you live. It's not relevant!

We got a bursary and send dd private although we don't really earn that much. When we went to look at schools it really shone out. If we had more than one child we couldn't do it. Don't think anyone has really been too judgmental but dd kept winning prizes at school-stealth boast. So none of the primary mum's are too fussed.

We wouldn't be able to afford it, but if I had the money (and the children, still working on that bit) I'd absolutely use private schools.

I think there's a lot of good reasons why people judge your decision but ultimately, just do what you think is best for your children

Not sure I could tell working class Glaswegian from middle class although the first time I went there I struggled to understand the lovely taxi driver I was talking too who assured me he'd toned it down for my benefit.
Im a great fan of regional accents (what ever class), where my grand parents lived the accent and dialect have now sadly died out.

Without a doubt children at many independent schools with very similar accents regardless of where they live.

MamaDane thankyou

I am not criticising ANY of these things. I am making an observation. You are the one who is obviously uncomfortable with the observation. I personally couldn’t care less what accent someone has. But accents do have an impact on how people are viewed- that’s the reality.

Happy gardening- people in Glasgow can tell though- that’s the point and why it is an issue.

And I am not criticising Glasgow in any way- my son lives there. I am explaining some of the political and social context of the city which, again, is based on fact. It has high levels of poverty, voted to leave the union and is mostly made up of Labour and SNP voters. Again- if you take issue with this, that is due to your own issues.

"But accents do have an impact on how people are viewed- that’s the reality."
True apparently I make Princess Ann sound working class and I'm aware that some when they first meet me (in particular those I work with) think Im a posh stuck up cow but I find it doesn't take long for people to realise that this is far from the truth.

And the point about where I have worked and lived is to give context on where my own understanding comes from. I am far from a snob.

Perhaps we should start a separate thread about Glasgow! You Glaswegians seem to get everywhere and also you're all very loyal to it but I suspect some might feel slight excluded.

Accents do mark out your social class. (One reason why adopting a new class is simpler in the UK than, say, the US. Impoverished aristos are from a noticeably different class to the fabulously wealthy Jamie Oliver.)

I have a terrible accent half Yorkshire half Brummie. It usually takes people a while to realise I'm not completely stupid.

Arguably

"Accents do mark out your social class."
But so do other less easily defined or indentified things.

“There are plenty of other ways of fuelling social division; your values, where you choose to live, what sort of home you live in, your occupation what hobbies you do and even what news paper you read.”

Signifying or signalling social division, perhaps, but I doubt these things are a root cause or fuel for social division.

Educating people separately sorted by religion or wealth brings those people together as a group defined by that characteristic. How can people beyond, or outside, or in a different group, have the same relationship?

Wealth in education keeps the networks built as the basis for advancement.

We don’t build our social, educational and working lives around our hospital visits. We do often build these lives on our educational experience and the lifelong friends made there.

(Privately educated refusenik)