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Secondary education

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Sent a note with daughter and coat still got confiscated

325 replies

Lionness2020 · 09/09/2017 12:25

My daughter started in Year 7 BullersWood on Wed 6th Sept.
She came home after her first day excited to show me her new books and weekly planner. We sat down together to read through it, I had to sign parent/teacher contract and then we went on to read the school policies and rules.
Whilst reading I came to realize that now I need to buy my daughter a black coat! This isn't an issue....I will buy a black coat ( I just need some time to do this).
She left for school on Thursday with her current coat (purple I might add, I know its bright, but it was that or pink!) and I sent a note with her explaining the situation to giver to her teacher, my daughter got to the school gates and took her coat off and put it in her bag and never gave the note in I found out later that evening....my assumption here is that she was scared she may get disciplined or that it was a hot day and she didn't need a coat.
Come Friday morning, its raining and daughter decides she's going to wear the purple coat as it's waterproof (it was raining most of the day on Fri, I think i saw the sun come out around 3oClock), so again I wrote a note for her to hand to the teacher.
Now this is info I have managed to gather from my DD.......She was going into morning registration, as they were filing into class, the headteacher of Yr7 has stopped her about her coat (according to my daughter her office is opposite her form room). So, daughter says she has a note, hands it over, head of year reads it and say "how sweet, I will have to confiscate your coat and you can have it back at the end of the day, as it's breaking school rules".
I was absolutely astounded by this, I can't believe my daughter had no coat to wear during break/lunch on a cold/rainy day!
Where was the health, safety and well-being of my child?
Not a happy mum!
I will be making an appointment to see the headteacher.

OP posts:
MaisyPops · 09/09/2017 16:23

frequency
I used to have a nose piercing. Lots of schools don't allow staff with facial piercings so I didn't wear it to work.
I wouldn't have been a worse teacher for wearing it, just like a child with non-natural hair wouldn't be a worse learner.
The fact is that part of life is following the rules of organisations.

If I honestly thought parents would make their hold follow a dress code instead of a uniform then I'd be more than happy to go down that route (having worked in a school with a dress code). Sadly, the daft ones who send their kids in wearing trainers and leggings despite a clear uniforms would also have a problem with a dress code and I could see huge amounts of time being spent on why its not appropriate for boys to wear their jeans half way down their arse/why a crop top is not appropriate attire for school.

WhereDidThatTurtleComeFrom · 09/09/2017 16:25

Why do people think it's ok to bully a child because the parent got the wrong colour coat?

MSLehrerin · 09/09/2017 16:30

@WhereDidThatTurtleComeFrom bully a child for having the wrong colour of coat? Where did you get that from?

The child had the wrong colour of coat because the parent hadn't read the uniform rules correctly. The coat was removed from
said child and presumably returned at the end of the day, with advice to parent to buy correct colour. How is this 'bullying'? Do you realise what bullying means? It's persistent unwanted behaviour towards a person, which continues despite being asked or told to stop.

Badhairday1001 · 09/09/2017 16:34

Caprianna you're coming across as a total twat.

Caprianna · 09/09/2017 16:34

I wish more teachers knew what bullying meant as there are far too much of it in our schools and completely overlooked. This is my point. Spend time dealing with whats important not pupils with pink hair or purple coats!

Eolian · 09/09/2017 16:36

Well I speak three fluently and a couple conversationally, so I'm not doing too badly. And I'm pretty good grammatically in them, because I'm a languages teacher. I don't usually criticise people's grammar online, because it's rude and largely pointless, but I make exceptions for people who are goadily and ignorantly slagging off the teaching profession.

MSLehrerin · 09/09/2017 16:36

I've just defined bullying below @Caprianna for the benefit of those who misuse the term and throw it around inappropriately.

Teachers are well versed in what real bullying looks like and how to deal with it.

lljkk · 09/09/2017 16:37

Gawd that's a strict school compared to what I'm sued to. Right down to the only colour bag allowed, hair accessories must ONLY be in school colours, etc. (pick out the girl who went to school in a culture where no one has school uniform)

Caprianna · 09/09/2017 16:38

Eh why exactly Badhair? I am complaining about calibre of teaching staff in British schools and I am a twat ? I did not invent the recruitment crisis in education. Education is not competitive compared to banking /finance in London which is where the talent go. There are exceptions of course.

MSLehrerin · 09/09/2017 16:38

Are we twins @Eolian? French, German teacher to trade now working in Learning Support / SEBD. Am a grammar Nazi and proud of it. We shall await @Caprianna's apology.

itsbetterthanabox · 09/09/2017 16:39

MSLeherein
So you don't think it would be mayhem without uniform rules? So why do we have them? Which rules do stop mayhem and which have no use?

MSLehrerin · 09/09/2017 16:42

I'd be shite in the financial sector in the City @Caprianna as I'm a talented teacher and linguist but 'mathematically challenged' by my own admission. Sweeping statements much?

Do you work in the City yourself?

MSLehrerin · 09/09/2017 16:44

We have rules in schools to mimic the rules of society. Am not a particular fan of uniform per se but fully appreciate the need for rules in schools and the enforcement of them. Hope this answers your question @itsbetterthanabox

Eolian · 09/09/2017 16:46

Smile Hello twin! French and German teacher now cover supervisor with a bit of adult ed and primary MFL on the side, speak some Spanish and Italian (and am teaching myself Japanese).

itsbetterthanabox · 09/09/2017 16:48

Not really. So it's just following rules for the sake of following rules. I get it but it doesn't make sense.

MSLehrerin · 09/09/2017 16:48

@Eolian Japanese sounds fab - would love to learn! We've got Mandarin at school now and the lovely teacher is running lunchtime clubs for the kids. I might pop along and join in the fun 😃

Borntoflyinfirst · 09/09/2017 16:49

The thing is it doesn't really matter if it's a crazy rule - it's right there in the uniform list and so it's totally OP's fault that the child was in the wrong item. No point blaming the school.

I am also surprised that a secondary school child wanted to wear a coat. Well done for having such a sensible child OP!

MaisyPops · 09/09/2017 16:50

Well said MS.

What's the point in having rules if you're going to say 'ah well yeah, today you don't have to follow them, but tomorrow you might'.

I like my exercise books to be neat and have the date and title underlined. I like students lined up outside my room sensibly. I make them tuck their shirt in. No point having expectations and then only selectively enforcing them. (In preparation for the 'but none of those things help learning', student voice has said they like calm, orderly classrooms, they like their books looking neat because it makes them proud of their work. our students actually like the strict, friendly teachers)

MSLehrerin · 09/09/2017 16:52

@itsbetterthanabox I think you're being obtuse. Of course schools don't simply have rules for the sake of enforcing them, nor does society. Use a bit of common sense.

Badhairday1001 · 09/09/2017 16:52

Caprianna that is a ridiculous statement! Teachers are amazing. The 'talent' that you are talking about probably wanted to be bankers not teachers and wouldn't last a day in a classroom. Teaching is about so much more than knowing your subject. In all of the schools that I have worked in teachers have been passionate, knowledgeable and inspiring. Teaching is bloody hard work, that is the reason we have a recruitment crisis.

  • Apologies if my SPaG is shit, I'm on my phone.
MSLehrerin · 09/09/2017 16:55

Spot on @Badhairday1001

Some of the best teachers I have ever had the privilege to work with have had Ordinary degrees. Some of the worst have been those with degrees up to their armpits but no empathy with the kids and poor classroom and behaviour management. It's a common misconception amongst those who know bugger all about being in a classroom who think the best teachers are the most qualified ones.

Frequency · 09/09/2017 17:00

We have rules in schools to mimic the rules of society

Then the rules should at least mimic the rules of society. Can you name one business who would send their staff home for wearing a coat outside of the building in the wrong colour?

Or a business which forces staff to wear sweaters indoors when it's roasting outside?

The rules have gone too far the other way. We need a sensible balance.

^I used to have a nose piercing. Lots of schools don't allow staff with facial piercings so I didn't wear it to work.
I wouldn't have been a worse teacher for wearing it, just like a child with non-natural hair wouldn't be a worse learner.
The fact is that part of life is following the rules of organisations^

I understand that and the facial piercings thing is sensible especially for the children who'll be running around, flailing their arms about and (possibly) getting into scraps. It's a sensible safety policy (though perhaps not for the teachers. The hair thing still baffles me, though I suppose, if schools are mimicking work places, a lot of work places do ban unnatural hair colours. Still, it's sad that we are treating our youngsters like mini adults.

FYI, I follow the school rules. I just don't agree with them.

There are rules coming into place in neighbouring schools that I will not be following if our school adopts them such as no 'boots' including shoes that come upto the ankle. My daughter walks three miles to school and back, in the winter she needs big, sturdy shoes. Or thick, black tights for girls along with not being able to remove their blazer/sweater no matter the weather. That, in my book, is starting to get a bit dangerous/silly.

retreatwhispering · 09/09/2017 17:00

I don't think you're being unreasonable OP.

MsLehrerin I've never been moved to comment in such a negative way before, but sincerely hope that your unpleasant attitude to the OP at 14.31 is not typical of UK teachers in general.

I guess you're a MFL teacher? In which case you're already aware that plenty of countries do very well without school uniform and the unnecessary, time consuming officiousness that goes with them.

Spend time dealing with whats important not pupils with pink hair or purple coats!

Yes.

MSLehrerin · 09/09/2017 17:02

@retreatwhispering all views are my own as is your opinion. Thank feck. Thanks for your feedback and comments tho. Much appreciated 🙄

Fuckit2017 · 09/09/2017 17:13

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