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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

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Original poster

Parent away during exam week

16 replies

user1490363758 · 24/03/2017 14:05

I have a short break booked in June with partner. My son has just received his GCSE exam timetable and there is a clash in dates. My sons father will be in my house with my son while I am away.
I can't decide whether it would be awfully detrimental to be away during this important period or if my son will be just fine with his father here to support him.

OP posts:

AtiaoftheJulii · 25/03/2017 07:25

Unless the dad is particularly useless, it'll be fine surely? GCSEs go on for weeks, there'll be plenty of time for you to be supportive as well.

glitterglitters · 25/03/2017 07:27

My parents left me home alone during my GCSEs AND my A-Levels 🙊

Don't worry I was so paranoid about oversleeping etc I set about 45 alarms and they phoned me to make sure I was awake each day 😂

ineedamoreadultieradult · 25/03/2017 07:28

My parents went away for 3 weeks during my GCSE's and I went to stay with my Auntie and it was fine its nit as if you can do much other than ensure they get there on time and be supportive anyway so as long as he can do that your DS will be ok.

Iamastonished · 25/03/2017 07:37

I am a little surprised that you didn't consider this before booking your break. Public exams have always taken place in June.

troutsprout · 25/03/2017 07:42

Does he need you there? It depends on the child really doesn't it? Is he used to a lot of support from you beyond you checking he's up and has left the house?
If it's just practical stuff then it can be prepared for in advance or done from afar. If it's more about emotional support/ help with organisation etc and only you can really do it ( depends on how aware his dad is of his potential needs too) then I would maybe be more reluctant to leave him.

user1490123259 · 25/03/2017 07:45

how does your son feel?

OddBoots · 25/03/2017 07:46

Assuming he has an ongoing relationship with his dad then he'll be fine.

VintagePerfumista · 25/03/2017 07:49

Depends on your relationship as a family. My daughter would be fine being left with her Dad during exams, I'm sure, but I'd never dream of booking something during that time.

So, ask your son, would he prefer you to be there. If he says yes, then you cancel your break.

swingofthings · 25/03/2017 12:12

Only you can know how your son will feel about it. How close is he to his dad? Have you gone away with his dad staying at yours before? What is your relationship with your son, ie. is he likely to feel you care more about your partner than him?

If it's a short break, then surely it will only be one or two exams so can't be so dramatic unless there is a reason for it. If you've posted, it means you have some concerns, so maybe you need to speak with your son about it.

clary · 25/03/2017 14:41

I was away on a school trip (I organised it so had to go!) while DS2 had some of his GCSEs. I think I missed a couple of exams.

It was fine, as long as he gets on OK with his dad I am sure your son will be OK too. GCSEs last for weeks, DD's this year start on May 16 and don't finish till June 21, chances are I will not be available at every moment during that 5 weeks :)

pointythings · 25/03/2017 18:04

We have one of DD1's friends living with us during the week - have had since the start of Yr11. So her mum won't be around daily during GCSEs. It will be fine.

BackforGood · 26/03/2017 18:36

Only you will know your son, and what support he is likely to need, and what his relationship with his Dad is like.
For me, I'd want to be there whilst they were doing GCSEs or A-levels, although the odd day or two wouldn't bother. I think it's about just having someone there if you've had a bad exam, or whatever - but maybe your ds's Dad will do this ?
I know someone who is completely OTT however, and won't go out for the day, or even for lunch "as obviously I need to be there for ds / dd" (She's on her 3rd child doing GCSEs now) which seems extreme the other way. I do raise my eyebrow at that.
There's a balance.

Leeds2 · 26/03/2017 20:37

I wouldn't have gone away during GCSEs/A Levels, even though I don't think I was of much actual help!
If you are happy with it, and your DS is, I don't think there is anything "wrong"with it, even though I couldn't have done it.

ZombieApocalips · 27/03/2017 07:06

Depends what your son and his father's like.

My ex would would go out the night before to buy last minute stationery and drive him to school even though he normally walks 20 mins to get there.

My son for all his faults, gets up on time daily so I don't have to worry about that bit.

SoulAccount · 27/03/2017 08:11

How much of a break in routine would this represent?

If his Dad will make sure he gets to bed in time, support him to revise but not bag or shout, be aware that he will feel under pressure, have an idea for what is needed and be ready with pencils, clear pencil case, lost compass, etc plus lunch stuff at home as they will only be in for exam days, or packed lunch when there are two exams, then fine.

Personally I think the GCSE period is a time when plans revolve (discreetly) round your child.

Crumbs1 · 27/03/2017 08:14

I would not have booked a holiday during public exam period. The dates are hardly a surprise. I'd not enjoy it if I went away and think it gives an odd message.

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