Have your YR7's settled in?

[beardedladydragon]

I know there is a thread on here already but I can't find the answers I am after. My ds has just started in YR 7. It is all boys. He is generally a happy go lucky kind of kid, quite sporty but pretty sensitive. It has been four weeks now and although he seems happy enough he hasn't made any friends. He spends most of his breaks and lunch times wandering by himself or watching the older kids sports practice. It makes me feel a bit sad. Most of the boys didn't know each other before they went. He only knew one boy from his primary school. They are in different classes and he seems to have made friends already.
Have your yr 7 DC made friends yet?

Am bumping you.

If he is sporty, have you tried getting him to join some of the clubs or teams. Sometimes it can just take a bit of time. If you are worried you can have a quiet word with his class form tutor and perhaps they can manipulate the seating plan. I would just make his home life as happy as possible and don't pass on your worries to him. Not everyone finds their 'tribe' at school but if he's happy enough then don't turn it into a big issue.

I'd send an email to the form tutor. I'm sure they would want to know about this as they will want to help him settle in and for him to be happy. They may be able to help him. I know at dd's school there's a group for kids who need help settling in where they play board games etc, but you'd only know about it if you asked.

Going to the library during breaks sometimes or clubs are other possibilities.

My DS hasn't made any friends either. He's was one of two people from primary going to this high school, he isn't friends with the other boy and he isn't in his class. Now they have their sets I was hoping he'd make friends. They sit them boy/girl/boy/girl in all classes so I don't think this helps. My DS spends his playtimes alone in the library reading comics. He seems to like that but I worry about him.
No advice sorry but wanted to let you know that you are not alone in this.

Thank you. He seems happy enough, he just hasn't seemed to have made any friends. We have a parents form meeting next week where we get to meet his key teachers and other parents. I am going to ask her then. His main out of school hobby is a very girls based environment so he has spent a lot of time in female company so I wonder if it is a bit of a shock to be surrounded by boys!

It is very very early days yet.I know it is easier said than done but don't worry and just give it time.

My DS sounds exactly the same - happy enough but spends majority of break times alone wandering about

Incident yesterday where some older kids stole his blazer then shoved him about a bit - he kicked them in retaliation so that's been a difficult one to navigate :/ he has autism so doesn't understand social situations which I guess makes him an easy target so called form tutor to ensure it's nipped in bud and he's reminded not to lash out

My son has only made one new friend, a girl. Unless they are super confident year 7 is a hard year. I'm sure everything will fall into place but I do think you would be right to get the school involved, I do also agree it's good to join clubs etc.

I would definitely let the school know. My DS hated his taster day and equally hated his first day in yr7 and I rang HoY7 and she was very helpful. DS is also in an all boys school which I think has been a culture shock for him.

celeb that sounds awful, your poor DS. I hope the form tutor is dealing with the other kids not just your DS kicking.

My son didn't know anybody in his form when he started and the first week was really hard, he had dreaded going and was really nervous. On his second day some of the year 7s got pushed around a bit and it was very intimidating. Then clubs started in the second week and now, four weeks in he's much more settled and has made new friends, all children who went to the sports clubs too. I would really recommend lunchtime clubs, my son hated "hanging around" and wasn't used to it at all from primary - it is really hard and my son struggles a lot with the older children who can be quite intimidating even without physical bullying, it's definitely a shock to the system !!