Thanks Error! I highly recommend these threads for having people to mither on to, when most of the world doesn't get it! I remember when dd was younger reading them and thinking a)how stressful but also b)they are big kids now - well yes they are, but big kids=big stress 
Good luck to your ds Shanghai.
dd went off seeming quite calm this morning. She set a good example for me to follow
Had a good breakfast. Last night she raised the prospect that her friends are getting big gifts for reaching target grades. I'm not sure whether she raised the conversation in hope, or just as a conversation piece, but as her target grades are all a* I refuse to put her under that sort of pressure. I'm more of a rewarding for effort person, so I've instigated someone's idea here of a little tiny gift after each exam and I will probably give her something a little bigger at the end of the exams.