Can I be slightly smug about DS? Unable to in RL

[smugandsmugger]

We live in a rural, wealthy area. We are the only people in our group of friends that chose our local Comprehensive, everyone else chose the Private route.
Our friends are lovely but I know there was a lot of discussion about our choice. One person even asked me if DH was worried about his job security.

Anyway, DS got AAA at A levels and is off to his first choice of Uni. Four of his friends are going to Oxbridge.
For all the middle class angst about schools sometimes State education is the best choice.

Go ahead and be smug and very proud of him. My DD go to the local comp and are doing great, but I love a success story to bolster my convictions that we are doing the right thing in this age of buying advantage.

Well done smug . Sounds like your DS deserved his fab results.

My DS has just gone in to Y13 - so will be taking his A levels next summer. Hoping for some equally good results too.

Brilliant, well done your ds. You can indeed be smug.

Why can't you tell friends and family in real life?

I send my DC to independent school and am still very pleased to hear about the successes of children who were not as lucky. Why wouldn't I be? It's not a competition.

Thank you for indulging me.

I am delighted for your DS and clearly it was the best choice for him. Please don't confuse this with being the best choice for everyone.

SheGotAll - going to a private school does not mean the child is luckier than one who goes to State school.

Really Toughas? I always got the impression from MN that it was well nigh impossible for a comprehensive educated child to get decent A levels and go to a good university. Even though I know it's not so.

Tough, it certainly wasn't my intention to be rude. Apologies if you see it that way.

My smugness is due to the pity we've received for not paying for our DC's education.

Tough the private schools round here have stiff entrance exams so they aren't for thick rich kids, just bright rich kids.

Well done - alas a Government survey in 2012/13 revealed that two thirds of state schools don't send any pupils off to Oxbridge let alone 4 in one year."Sometimes state education is the best choice" - well yes, if you live in a "rural, wealthy area" such as yours, but the majority of middle class families live in towns and cities surrounded by non-middle class families on free school meals.

Pity from who smug? Your 'lovely' group of friends?

The absolute best top performing state school in our area, held up as a beacon for the rest of the area and which pupils travel to for miles around (it's a faith school so church goers can get in while non-church goers have to go elsewhere while the lucky few get in) - gets zero oxbridge entrance in a typical year, and perhaps 10% Russell Group in a good year. that is the best we can hope for if we don't stretch our finances to breaking point to manage private.

iPaid children who attend independent school receive advantages both while they are in school and often for a very long time afterwards.

These are not things that can solely be measured in grades.

Children who receive that are bloody lucky.

yay! that's brilliant, bet you're so proud (and relieved!) those grades are seriously impressive
hope he has a great freshers week....try not to miss him too much ;)

My state sixth form got I think five people into Oxbridge and others into Imperial, LSE, Durham (think Durham might be the hardest to get into with its GCSE requirements), many many RG unis....and that fact doesn't prove anything about state/private. Just that the teachers and students worked hard & engaged with their subjects.
Don't ruin the thread....it's a nice one.

Congrats to your DS!
I'm not surprised that you are smug. And, I'll bet, relieved.
Hope he enjoys his time at University.

Congratulations on his fab results. My two DC are at a great state school and most of our friends have gone down the private route too, so I know that feeling.

Congrats to your DS. I completely see why you're feeling smug. I would (a bit) too! My kids are in state although I teach in private (having taught in state previously). I would acknowledge that the typical grades of a child going through each system are likely to be higher in the private sector, (although of course a very clever child can do well in either system) BUT that doesn't make the private school children 'luckier'. I often think my private school doesn't do a great job of preparing them for university, where they won't have all the pastoral care and nurturing they have been given in order to achieve the grades for university, and I worry for some of them. I'm sure your DS will thrive.

He has done really well and clearly you made the right choice for him.

Well done to your DS. I'm another mum who's DS have done well at the local catholic comp, despite my dMum's gloomy prediction that they would fail unless they went to a grammar school
(In fact they both got better A levels than their cousins in 2 super-selective grammars)

My sister's dd got better results at comp than her Eton boyfriend. They were delighted they'd turned down scholarship to top girls' school for her.