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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

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Original poster

Y9 - How self motivated is your DC

25 replies

minesawine · 04/03/2015 18:37

I have a very intelligent DS who is in top set for every subject. But the boy is so lazy and we fight EVERY day about him completing his homework and doing his revision. I would have thought that by Y9, a child would be in control of their own schedule and understand that work comes before play, but I am still producing revision timetables and checking whether his homework has been done on time (it is all set online and parents have access). What he produces seems to be good as he gets good marks (I don't check his work), but its the motivation that I struggle with and I am fed up with nagging him. I have tried leaving him to get on with it, and he did nothing. I am so worried about year 10 when it gets really serious.

OP posts:

Whereupon · 04/03/2015 18:40

What does the school do if he misses homework?
Does he have any swotty friends - peer pressure is very useful at this age.

TheFirstOfHerName · 04/03/2015 18:41

I think Y9 can be a tricky year. KS3 SATs don't exist any more, so students don't have a concrete goal. In three or four months, your DS will be giving up a third of his current subjects anyway, so it would take a student with a very mature attitude to be motivated to continue learning for the sake of learning itself.

In my experience, it gets better in Y10.

Hakluyt · 04/03/2015 18:45

Does he have any idea what he wants to do when he leaves school? Ds wants to go to Cambridge because he reckons that's the best route into stand up comedy so I just shrug and say well, up to you, but remember you need all As at GCSE............

lljkk · 04/03/2015 18:47

Yr10 isn't all that serious, imho.

ChaiseLounger · 04/03/2015 19:09

When he did nothing, did the school come down hard on him? Did he get detentions etc?

lljkk · 04/03/2015 19:31

Are detentions "coming down hard"? Water off duck's back to my DS.

Original poster

minesawine · 04/03/2015 19:40

Hi - thanks for the replies so far. Yes he does get detentions if he doesn't hand in homework, but that does not worry him too much. He usually manages to get it done last minute.

I think you are right about being able to drop some subjects in year 10, he chose his own options, so that should help.

No he doesn't know what to do. He wants to do Economics for A'Level, what he will do with it I have no idea. He talks about going to a good uni.

My clever, funny, lazy boy :)

OP posts:

TheFirstOfHerName · 04/03/2015 20:08

Maths at A-level would be more useful for pretty much any university course (including Economics) but you didn't ask for advice on A-level options so I'll shut up now.

AtiaoftheJulii · 04/03/2015 20:22

I don't know how self motivated my y9 son is, but the most I ever say is "got any homework?" and I don't check whether he's doing it, or get involved with revision.

pointythings · 04/03/2015 21:27

I don't check Yr9 DD's work any more, gave up halfway through Yr8. She needs to manage her workload herself and does it pretty well - but she chose options last year so is only doing subjects she cares about. It does make a difference.

titchy · 04/03/2015 21:35

Detach completely - yr 9 is exactly the right year to leave him to his own devices as this year doesn't matter that much!

motherinferior · 04/03/2015 21:53

I have never managed either of my daughters' homework. DD1 is 14 and manages a fairly heavy schedule including early Art (so a coursework portfolio). I would say she's pretty motivated.

BackforGood · 04/03/2015 23:09

I have never managed any of my dcs' homework since infant school. Am frankly quite surprised you are doing this for a 13/14 yr old. They are hardly going to learn if you are doing it for them.

To answer your question, mine are all very motivated by things that interest them, but, at 13/14, that's not school work.

If your ds is getting good marks, then I don't see why he needs to be doing more ?

It doesn't "get really serious" in Yr10, btw. There's a thread running this week asking if anyone's Yr11 dc has been spotted doing any revision for GCSEs yet, and the over-riding answer is 'no'.

Maddaddam · 05/03/2015 10:29

My y9 dd2 is very self moitivated and organised, she doesn't need any checking up on. Which is pleasing as I agree with some of the other posters that we shouldn't need to be too involved at secondary age.

My y10 dd1 however is much more scatty. She tends to do homework, more or less, but sometimes forgets and often just does the minimum, except in her favourite subjects (art, graphics, history) where she'll do lots extra. Sometimes I feel I should check up on her more (but then life intervenes and I just hope for the best). I have noticed though that she had exams this week (1/2 way through yr 10) and they had a series of talks on revision and study skills and for the first time she's been doing revision properly, on her own, so maybe things do change in yr10.

I think it's a lot easier to be motivated in the GCSE classes when they've shed the kids who aren't at all interested, the dc feel they've chosen their subjects, more or less, and things do crank up a gear.

starfish4 · 05/03/2015 10:35

She's not a genius, but my DD is also in the top sets. She rarely revises and we're trying to get her into doing this, even if it's a 10 minute look at one aspect of a subject - so far I don't think it's working. She is fairly good at putting effort into her homework, when she eventually gets around to it. Her school issues detentions without fail for missed homework, and lucky for us that's a deterrent. If he's getting good marks, what he's doing must be acceptable.

For some reason DD hasn't had much homework this term. We had thought they were trying to take the pressure before choosing options, but nothing has changed. I don't think this helps, as she puts it off due to the fact there isn't loads to do. Now she's chosen her options, she admits she's putting more into subjects she's chosen, as it comes down to assessed effort if a subject is oversubscribed. For subjects she's dropping, she's doing the bare minimum!

Re: keeping an eye on homework, I try and just show a general interest by asking what she's got and what it involves. I don't keep a close eye whether she's done it, but do gently remind her about homework and if I see her doing something ask if I can look at it or say something positive about what I see her doing.

CiderwithBuda · 05/03/2015 10:39

My DS is year 9 also. Bright but lazy. He is doing ok but is capable of more - as the teachers keep telling us. Memories of every school report I ever received too!

DS is very good at doing his himework. It is usually done on time. But he does bare minimum. If he can get away with a one word answer he will.

We have just had parents evening and quite a few teachers said it is very common with Year 9 boys in particular. General consensus was that they wake up a bit in year 10!

perrycourt · 05/03/2015 20:04

so pleased to find this thread! my dd is at boarding school and seems to be in detention every week - when challenged she says this is the only year she can relax as every year after this is exams or exam work! I had got to the point of thinking of moving school

Whereupon · 06/03/2015 10:48

Perry - do you think that her being at boarding school makes it harder for her to get her work done - maybe more distractions and less parental pressure?

perrycourt · 06/03/2015 16:45

Whereupon - without doubt! unfortunately we also have the problem that she is an academic scholar at a rather unacademic school so she seems desperate not to be seen as swotty. Are also having problems with her not pushing herself as she doesn't want to be seen as clever. Its a very sporty school so a lot of good sports pupils with lower academic levels. A lot of what we were promised ie rising standards just hasn't materialised. She does say she wants good GCSE's and will start to work in September - problem is its too late to do anything if she doesn't change by then!

CiderwithBuda · 06/03/2015 18:18

That sounds hard perry court. A bit counterproductive for her - from the school's point of view - why give an academic scholarship if they are not going to really start supporting the academic students? I'm sure it must be hard for her. Does the school begin with M?

IreneA78 · 06/03/2015 18:28

I am a bit concerned that managing your DC's revision is bound to make him rebel.You need to give him ownership if you want him to develop self-motivation!

Original poster

minesawine · 07/03/2015 16:20

Thanks for the responses, they are interesting and helpful.

I had a call from DS's English teacher saying he is on the verge of getting Saturday detentions because of the state of his homework.

I have also had GCSE parents evening, where the teachers said he was great and expected to do really well.

He is going to choose his subjects, and showed a lot of interest in some, which was really encouraging.

It is really confusing because if he is generally doing well, then I should stop stressing. I am going to back off and let him be responsible for his own timetable.

I am sure he will be fine. and my hair will be less grey!

OP posts:

MyballsareSandy · 08/03/2015 08:36

I have two DDs in year 9. One is self motivated and organised, I rarely need to check on her. The other is a scatty lazy nightmare, constant detentions for lack of homework, which she doesn't seem to care about. When she does eventually get round to doing any work it will be the bare minimum.

Preciousbane · 08/03/2015 18:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

perrycourt · 09/03/2015 19:30

CiderwithBuda - we were promised things would change but as students are in mixed ability classes for most lessons and dd is not the quiet, sit down and work type, not much is being done. she prefers to have fun to working and teachers don't seem too hot on keeping control. She is at the arch rival sport school from M!!

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