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Secondary education

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Original poster

"Boys make a camp. Girls make them some drinks" said DD's teacher today.

48 replies

Spidermama · 09/07/2013 15:53

They're doing an enrichment and were doing outdoor activities. The teacher really did say, "Boys make a camp. Girls make them some drinks"

They're 14, nearly 15.

On what planet is that acceptable?

I want to complain but DD doesn't want me to.

OP posts:
JenaiMorris · 09/07/2013 16:06

Was the teacher making a point? I wonder if it was part of a greater plan

Original poster
Spidermama · 09/07/2013 16:09

Nope. As the girls stared open mouthed he said, 'come on ask them what they want to drink.'

Angry
OP posts:
luxemburgerli · 09/07/2013 16:11

I'd explain to your DD how important it is that these attitudes are stomped on, and therefore you will be talking to the teacher. Then ask the teacher what happened, in case there is (hopefully) more to it. If not, complain away!!

luxemburgerli · 09/07/2013 16:14

Fwiw, I had a PE teacher at school who said it was important that we (the girls) take part in the (co-ed) PE lessons so that when we went to our boyfriends' sports matches we'd have some idea what's going on. Blatantly ignoring that there were girls in my class representing the at the county level. I wish I'd known enough then to complain, so that he didn't spout that bullshit to any more young people.

JenaiMorris · 09/07/2013 17:20

lux please tell me you're at least 40. I had one or two teachers a bit like that, but they're mostly dead now (through age, I hasten to add, not my ire).

I suppose they could have engaged the services of the Home Ec teacher, to learn you how to make scones and that for the cricket tea and ensure their whites were gleaming and grass/ball stain free Hmm

JenaiMorris · 09/07/2013 17:23

spider I am so hoping this is part of a greater plan and that there'll be a reveal later on.

A teacher friend of mine once made an outrageously sexist statement hoping that one of her students would speak out - but they didn't.

luxemburgerli · 09/07/2013 17:28

Unfortunately I'm 28!! I think this particular teacher was not the norm though, he was a bit crazy

ZZZenagain · 09/07/2013 17:28

that's not good. My dd wouldn't have liked that. It is not putting the right message across so I think it is reasonable to bring it up.

TinTinsSexySister · 09/07/2013 17:30

Please, you have to raise this with the teacher. For women everywhere and their DDs! Grin

JenaiMorris · 09/07/2013 17:41

I suppose that maybe if some of the girls were complaining, the teachers' perspective might have been "well, you might think sport is a load of bollocks but at least you'll have an idea what your boyfriends are up to, and what you're missing out on"

JenaiMorris · 09/07/2013 17:44

Fuck, this isn't about sport is it? I've confused posts. Ignore me Blush

I'd rather make the tea than put up tents. But then so would my (male) dp. Avoidance of physical exertion is an equal opportunities endeavour here Grin

motherinferior · 09/07/2013 17:48

Christ on a bike, I may not be hog-whimpering wild about single-sex ed but that kind of remark makes me think thank fuck DD1's comp is all-female....

Original poster
Spidermama · 09/07/2013 20:08

I have complained but explained to the Head's PA that my dd didn't want me to so I wasn't going to give my name. She seemed pretty taken aback at the comments and almost laughed in outrage.

I said I felt it was important for someone to have a word with him and she assured me someone would.

OP posts:
elfycat · 09/07/2013 20:20

I'd explain to DD that the teacher is treading on the toes of LAW and must have this brought to his attention.

Original poster
Spidermama · 09/07/2013 20:57

Elfy I did just that. I also mentioned this to the head's PA.

DD was utterly mortified that I called to complain even though I didn't mention mine or her name. (It's a big school. We won't be identified.)
She's so easy to mortify. I guess that comes with being 14.

OP posts:
complexnumber · 09/07/2013 23:24

So glad you did complain.

How old is the teacher who set these 'tasks'?

mummytime · 10/07/2013 13:55

My DD would have very vocally complained.

Arcticwaffle · 10/07/2013 14:01

I'd have complained too. If my dd hadn't got there first, my yr 7 dd has already sent the head a petition about gendered choices in PE so I could probably leave it with her these days.

In our secondary most of the teachers are fine but the PE and DT teachers seem to be more old guard sexist/ignorant types, they may mean well in an old-fashioned way, but it's as though social change and education on these issues has passed them by.

EDMNWiganSalfordandBlackpool · 10/07/2013 14:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BackforGood · 13/07/2013 16:08

I suspect my dd would have just raised an eyebrow at the teacher, then walked over to start putting up tents. I suspect she'd have felt anyone who comes out with rubbish like that, is probably not worth arguing with.

Am too, so hoping this is part of a greater plan to challenge something, and the teacher was 'acting' this opening to the camp.

CountingClouds · 14/07/2013 15:48

You shouldn't become one of those PC parents moaning about everything that happens. It also embarrasses the kids.

If its a pattern of behavior then that's a different matter. Last year in sex-ed my DS was taught how to use a tampon. FFS - I bit my teeth but sometimes even teachers can be idiots to.

Maybe in another exercise he got the girls to collect wood and told the boys to make their beds. Maybe the girls had been complaining about having to do anything hard and the teacher didn't want to pick a fight at that time. Maybe the boys had been naughty and it was a punishment for them. It really isn't worth becoming one of those PC parents that spoil things for everybody.

OddBoots · 14/07/2013 15:56

CountingClouds "Last year in sex-ed my DS was taught how to use a tampon. FFS" Hmm I'm not sure why that's a problem, unless he's too young to know about periods?

Empress77 · 14/07/2013 16:07

"spoil things for everybody"! :) Really? My day would be spoiled if I found my dc's school was teaching blatent sexism. Would it be "spoiling it for everybody" to complain if the teacher had made the division along race lines? I want to know my children are learning equality in school - PC exists for a reason. On the plus side it probably did make the children realise that teachers arent always right and to think for themselves rather than following order unthinkingly, a good lesson in that respect!

CountingClouds · 14/07/2013 16:23

You are not allowed to split a class on race.

Saying, "ok girls do this, boys do that", is a quick easy way for a teacher to split the class in two and get tasks started quickly. PC exists for a reason but it can also be abused when taken to far. I imagine a parent could find a PC way to complain every single day if they wanted. So its not a big deal unless its a pattern of behavior rather than a one off.

OddBoots - Exactly why should a boys practice using tampon? (it really embarrassed the girls), I am not even sure why its necessary to teach boys about periods?

JenaiMorris · 14/07/2013 17:14

So they know the basics of human reproduction maybe, Counting. And don't recoil in horror when they discover their girlfriend has bled inadvertently on the sheets. I dunno, any number of reasons. Why shouldn't they learn?

As an aside I don't think it's strictly necessary to learn about the Tudors or to read Shakespeare but I'd rather children did than didn't Confused

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