Who can afford private schools in the UK?

[wjchoihk]

Hi. I am not sure if this is an appropriate question to ask here. But I have always wondered how rich you should be to send children to private schools in UK. Fees are anywhere from 3000 up to 10000 per term. Even allowing for wide gaps in income, thinking of 'avearge' UK wage of 26,000 pound, math simply don't add up for a normal life with such high fees. I also know only 7% of children go private though.

How much of private parents live on "inherited" wealth and how much on simply superior current earnings? I have my kids at SW London privates but I wouldn't be able to afford this without current int'l expat package. Some parents at my kids' schools LOOK and ARE very very rich but most of them LOOK quite down to earth. But I can't ask....

Woozle- I agree. That is another elephant in the room. There are people who think private is best, regardless not realizing that pecking order is ruthless!

seeker - you make it sound as if only you can see the elephant.

A lot of private schools are ranked below state schools like Tiffins and friends. We 'private' parents can read. We get it that simply because a school is private does not by default make it the 'best'.

"A brief extract from a Peter Wimsey novel, for your edification and delight.

^"I suppose Tallboy thinks I'm not worth speaking to, just because he's been to a public school and I haven't.?

?Public school,? said Mr. Bredon, ?first I've heard of it. What public school??

?He was at Dumbleton,? said Mr. Smayle, ?but what I say is, I went to a Council School and I'm not ashamed of it.?

?Where's Dumbleton?? demanded Ingleby. ?I shouldn't worry, Smayle. Dumbleton isn't a public school, within the meaning of the act.?

?Isn't it?? said Mr. Smayle, hopefully. ?Well, you and Mr. Bredon have had college educations, so you know all about it. What schools do you call public schools??

?Eton,? said Mr. Bredon, promptly, ??and Harrow,? he added, magnanimously, for he was an Eton man.

?Rugby,? suggested Mr. Ingleby.

?No, no,? protested Bredon, ?that's a railway junction.?

Ingleby delivered a brisk left-hander to Bredon's jaw, which the latter parried neatly.

?And I've heard,? Bredon went on, ?that there's a decentish sort of place at Winchester, if you're not too particular.?

?I once met a man who'd been to Marlborough,? suggested Ingleby.

?I'm sorry to hear that,? said Bredon. ?They get a terrible set of hearty roughs down there. You can't be too careful of your associates, Ingleby.?

?Well,? said Mr. Smayle, ?Tallboy always says that Dumbleton is a public school."

?I daresay it is?in the sense that it has a Board of Governors,? said Ingleby, ?but it's nothing to be snobbish about."^

BS- I was merely agreeing with the previous poster. And the use of the form "there are people who" to most competent readers means "there are some people who do, but there are other people who don't"

seeker - the use the form 'private schools are better' to most competent readers means 'the top of the ranking tables are stacked with private schools'

You seem to have no problems accusing others of not being 'competent readers' while at the same being 'guilty' yourself

I think it isn't always about exam results either. some private schools are more nurturing and caring whereas others get very good results but their pastoral care isn't that great.

Alot of parents like the small classes and the seemingly 'safer' environment the school may provide.

Seeker - it's much nicer if you just let it flow past you. I did make the mistake a bit earlier of not being able to resist one last time, but honestly, the relief in just not engaging....

seeker, I love that piece from Wimsey. Thank you.

It reminds me of a story from Oxford. The "lefties" at some prestigious college arranged a debate in the JCR on the night when the "posh boys" were all going to be at some ball. The motion was "This house believes in the abolition of Public Schools". They lined up some journos to be ready for a story about this famous College calling for the abolition of Public Schools. The posh boys went en masse to the first 5 minutes of the debate before going on to their ball. They asked to amend the motion by just one word - the Chair had to agree. They added "minor" before Public Schools.

You know, BS, do you think it would get it out of your system if you just told me exactly what I've done in this or a previous life to get under your skin so much? You go to such extraordinary efforts to try to discredit me- misquoting and lying and misinterpreting, popping up in all sorts of funny places. You've even name changed at least once, if not twice. I half expect you to turn up accusing me of something when I'm chatting about guinea pigs or horses with mud fever or cake decorating! It used to upset me a bit, then I thought it was funny, now I actually think it's a bit sad. And it's incredibly boring for everyone else, I'm sure. So, go ahead.

Sounds as though Wimsey is someone I should get to know - despite hearing about him third hand through other books, I've never actually read any!

seeker, I think you'll find there's a village missing its idiot somewhere.

at grovel.

I love Evelyn Waugh on grammar school boys too! While cringing.

You're right TOSN- and I've just been drawn in again. Damn. But I a just so baffled by it!

Oh, TOSN- I am so jealous that you've got them to read! Now, which should you start with? They are variable. Strong Poison, perhaps? Followed swiftly by Gaudy Night.

Oops. Epic derail!

But you won't get an answer, you'll just told again that you hate the working class and are still fuming ds didn't get into grammar school even though up until that moment you were the most vociferous supporter of the 11+ going.

There are people on here with whom I disagree frequently and fervently, but they make their points intelligently, and make nuanced points based on careful reading and thereby reasonable interrogation of what I say. I find this quite invigorating, albeit sometimes frustrating, which is probably why I am one of the 'familiar faces' which get rolly-eyes for being familiar.

I suppose I wouldn't be able to resist replying, though, if someone were equally intent on slandering me based on their own misunderstanding - like if I were repeatedly accused of having bought a million pound house in a leafy suburb to educate in a state school, perhaps. But it's all very silly.

Nit, with that Antonia Forest name, surely you've heard of Wimsey and his characteristic late cut?

seeker, I notice nobody ever responds to my wails about what a waste of money private schools were for my dcs - IMHO that gets up everyone's jumper.

Along with my loathing of the priorities people, I also hate those who think their privilege is the result of 'hard work'.

Not sure who said this... "To make the rich work harder, you pay them more. To make the poor work harder, you pay them less."

sieg well done for spotting the AF name! Yes, I've heard of it - Nick and Edwin bond over him, yes? But never read - see also The Nine Tailors, Mask of the Apollo, The Prince and The Pauper and Persuasion....

Popping up in weird places???

What is so 'weird' about the education forums?

It's a forum about education. I have school aged DCs. Why do you have a problem with me 'popping up' on such a forum? Now if I were to pop up on Breastfeeding then that would be stalky.and perhaps weird

But to answer your question, I said that a base income of £40k is enough to put a child through prep school but certain sacrifices had to be made like forgoing the annual long haul holiday.

You decided to lecture me on how it was an insensitive remark and how some parents you know sacrificed dinner to pay for swimming lessons.

a) if a person wants to forgo food so that their DC can splash around in water for 30mins then that is their choice. It's not as if they are making sacrifices so that the DC has shoes to wear. It's a swimming lesson for fecks sake.

b) you repeatedly come into threads like this, bypass the question being posed and instead lecture responents for being insensitive, uncaring etc, oblivious to the fact that you did exactly the same thing as the people you are lecturing.

As long as you persist in adopting a holier attitude then I will persist in reminding you of your double standards.

grovel - If I post what you post I wouldn't be making village idiot jokes

seig isn't refreshing for you to comment freely that private school was a waste of money for your children without posters calling you names? If I said the same about state schools then seeker and tosn will start going on about how my experience is rude, about fairness bla bla bla

Ah, right. You are just stupid them.

Rather a relief. I was starting to worry that you were someone who I knew in real life that I had upset, and your next step would be to slash my tyres. Or daub red paint on my front door.

TOSN- I would most definitely read The Mask Of Apollo. Only Persauasion if you like other JAs. The Nine Taylors is a good one. But as I said, Strong Poison and Gaudy Night (definitely in that order because of spoilers)are more complex and adult. Less straight "golden age" detective story. They're all available for Kindle.

What constitutes a waste of money is very subjective. Just like I rather spend £38k on a BMW even though it is rubbish in snow than to buy say a ford focus. My experience and my choice nothing to do with anyone and saying that people get so upset because education is about children is all just a smokescreen.

I once had a very revealing conversation with someone who sends 3 children to private prep school (afforded mostly by both parents working 65 hour weeks and this not seeing said children during the week even though they are at day school, and partly by borrowing against anticipated future inheritance from grandparents), discussing why I send my children to state schools and she doesn't.

It went a bit like this:
'Well, you [tw2k] know about education, so even if everyone else you know sends their children private, you can explain sensibly why you send them to state schools. And you can feel confident that you have chosen good ones. I don't know about education, and everyone I work with sends their children to private schools. I don't know how to find a good state school, and I wouldn't know how to defend that choice if I made it. So I take the easy option and do what other people do.'

(Said private school is a distinctly second-rate affair, with very little sport or other extra-curricular activity, lots of snobbishness and no observable educational advantage over the state school my children attend)

That is not to say that SOME privat schools aren't worth the money