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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

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Original poster

no parents evening

10 replies

earthamogg · 08/01/2013 20:45

Hello mumnetters. My ds's grammar school, which considers itself all very wonderful, does not have any kind of parents' evening. An experienced teacher of my acquaintance thinks that is extremely odd, as do I, but what do I know? My ds is in year 9 and I have only ever met one person who has taught him, but he was PE so doesn't count in my book . I had hoped new head teacher would bring change, but apparently not. It seems they like keeping the parents at arms' length. When you can get through to a teacher by email some of them are very nice, but I am really fed up about the general remoteness. Is this sort of thing commoner than I think? Am I unnecessarily curious? I have all sorts of other problems with the school, but this one really gets me. Any comments appreciated! Thanks

OP posts:

Kez100 · 08/01/2013 20:50

We have parents evenings and I really like them and wouldnt want them to go, but Im not sure that I've ever really learned anything I didn't know already (from report and just knowing my child). I just like being able to place a name or face when having discussions at home!

I have had to contact teachers three or four times over the years but ever near to parents evening, so I've done that by email and had a quick response. That's rather more valuable really.

webwiz · 08/01/2013 21:06

I can't imagine not having parent's evening even if its just for a general check in that things are going ok. There are some teachers who have taught all three of my DCs so it can be nice to see someone who knows us as a family and feel you have a bit more of a personal relationship with the school. Also at the last parent's evening it was useful to see if there were any grounds for DS's moaning about his new RE teacher.

incogneetow · 08/01/2013 21:10

I really like parents evening as a chance to actually meet their teachers and form an opinion of them; and often to thank them for the work they're doing with my sons.

If school were offering no kind of parents evening at all in yr9 I'd be shocked. Is he choosing options this time?

ds2 is in yr9 and will have an options information evening, with subject info available; then a few days later a traditional parents evening. All before he has to make his choices.

If I were in your position at this particular stage I would email ALL his teachers and say:

I am surprised that strange remote grammar does not have parents evenings. So I am taking this opportunity to ask whether you have any comments to pass on about babymogg's attitude and aptitude in your subject, and whether you would recommend him to choose this subject as his options. I would also like to say XXX XXX bla bla bla, x, y, z. You can contact me by phone or email to let me have your comments...

Leeds2 · 08/01/2013 21:27

In Years 7, 8 and 9 we had one Parents' Evening. This year, DD is in Year 10 and we get two! At the first of these, two of the teachers were absent due to illness, and both sent a written appraisal by email within the week.

I find them a bit of a waste of time, tbh, but I always attend and would be horrified if there weren't any. I would send the email suggested by Incogneetow, given that your son is about to choose his options and you/he may have more than a passing interest in his suitability/capability to do each subject!

Original poster

earthamogg · 09/01/2013 11:51

Thank you all for your lovely moral support! I know, I know--parents evenings probably aren't that useful in a concrete way, but I do want to actually meet these people and get the cut of their jib and all that. Sadly, we have missed the boat on the GCSE choices, Incogneetow, because the school is doing the apparently trendy thing of starting them early so the poor exam-fodder slog away for three years instead of two, and have to give up things like art that are life-enhancing. So it was last year that we had the talk with another man who had never taught babymogg (love that will call him it for ever) who advised on his choices. huh? I think I will anyway take to sending the type of email you suggest anyway, though, and ask how he is doing on an interim basis. Thanks again everyone for helpful input.

OP posts:

incogneetow · 09/01/2013 21:59

Good luck with that. Make sure you check back and let us know how you get on/what you get in response to the emails.

Original poster

earthamogg · 09/01/2013 23:27

Will do.

OP posts:

BackforGood · 10/01/2013 19:10

I do find that really odd - I can't fathom not being able to put a face to the name of the staff who clearly have such a big part in my dcs' lives.
I also find it amazing that all parents haven't been up in arms about it over the years!

echt · 11/01/2013 09:28

The last time I looked it was one of the few legal requirements of a school.

Daily act of communal worship.
Written report once year to parents.
Parent/teacher meeting.

OP, you say grammar school. Do you mean independent? If so, then they can do what they like.

echt · 11/01/2013 09:34

I've just looked. It IS statutory for a school to hold an annual meeting to discuss student progress with the parents. How they organise this is another matter.

On the other hand, you can insist on speaking to a teacher whenever you want. I don't mean at whatever time of the day, but however often you wish.

Again check on status of school. The independents can do as they please; others, not so.

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