How can I help dd2 decide wether to sit the 11+ or not ??

[MrsMorgan]

She is in a bit of a flap about it and other than giving her my opinion, there doesn't seem to be anything else I can say.

She wants to sit it, to see if she would pass, but isn't sure if she wants to go the the grammar school though. He main concern seems to be that there would be no boys , although I am sure there is more to it than that.

I have absolutly no idea if she would be likely to pass or not. I got her QCA results yesterday (yr5) and she got 5C for reading, 5C for english and 4c for maths. Her teacher explained that this is very good, but I am still non the wiser as to if it is good enough for a grammar school.

I know if she sat it and didn't pass, then she'd automatically get the 2nd choice, which is fine, it's a good school (dd1 goes there) and I am sure she'd do well there, but if she sat it and passed and was offered a place, then she cant turn it down can she because she'd then not have a place at 2nd choice would she ???

Help lol

Are there other places she will mix socially with boys?

You could ask her current teacher/s if they think she would be suited to a Grammar school - it doesn't suit everyone.

Think about her temperament and whether she would thrive being surrounded by lots of other clever/more clever girls.

If she really likes the school your other dd goes to and feels she'd fit in and you think she could achieve her potential there, then I would go with that. Fitting in and feeling comfortable in a school counts for a lot IMO.

She isn't sure if she likes the school dd1 goes to, but can't put her finger on why.

I think the thing with dd is, she is very popular etc but she isn't a girly girl, in terms of liking clothes, make-up etc and this year she does seem to have struggled somewhat with that because alot of her friends are like that.

Dd likes to work hard and loves to achieve things and so in that respect I think the grammar school would be brilliant for her.

The school dd1 goes to is fine, although has not been quite as good as I was expecting, and I can kind of see dd2's point when she says she isn't quite sure she'd like it there.

Not sure I will get the chance to speak to her current teacher before they break up now. The application pack actually says to speak to the head teacher before considering your child for the test, but I don't know anyone that has ever done that.

I just want dd to be happy, so whatever she chooses is ok with me.

Oh, she does swimming outside of school and so would still see boys, and her besst friend there, and i'd be more than happy for her to join another mixed sex club of some sort.

When do the results come through? In our area you find out whether you have passed or not before you apply for a place.

Here you have to apply to sit the test by 1st October, and apply to the schools by 31st October.

Then you sit the test on 6th November, and find out which school you have been offered at the beginning of March.

The open evening isn't until Sept 22nd either, which is a bit close to the deadline for applying to sit the test too. Would have preffered to have looked around before then.

Presumably you know about the merry-go-round of tutoring for the 11+?!!!

Unfortunately I would strongly recommend you either pay for a tutor or do it yourself (which is very do-able). Your dd would have to be quite brilliant to pass without help.

Is she taking it this Autumn? (In which case you have a happy summer ahead of you going through the workbooks!).

www.elevenplusexams.co.uk/ is invaluable for advice and pointing you to the right set of 11+ questions that will be asked in your particular education authority. (sorry if you know all this already).

Your dd may eventually become more girly. Butm y dd is in an all girls school and there are some less "girly" girls there too.

Good luck with the decision!

Thank's polly.

I am not really a fan of tutoring, mainly because I know of someone who was tutored to within an inch of their life, passed, got in and then struggled to keep up and hated it.

I couldn't afford to pay for a tutor anyway, so it's not really an issue. I don't mind getting her some work books though.

I think I will speak to dd2 again tonight, and then try and speak to either her teacher or the head tomorrow.

My dd had similar results to yours at the end of yr5 and passed the 11 plus with no tutor, but a bit of time with me and some books.

Has she been to the open day for the grammar school? Is there a big intake per year? My dd's grammar school has 170 places per year and I'd guarantee not all 170 are girly. Do you know anyone at the grammar school she can talk to about what it's like there? What about the school website, does it talk about after school clubs etc - are there some that would interest her?

The next open day isn't until Sept unfortunatly. Dd hadn't mentioned it before, else I'd have made sure we went to the last one.

I have just been on their website, and they have an extensive list of after school clubs, so I am going to sit and show her this later tonight. I have also sent for a prospectus.

The intake is only 150

Never had this with Dd1, because although she is also bright, she was adament she didn't want to go there, which was fine with me, because I think within reason, it should be their choice.

We are lucky that the are we live in, has good schools anyway, so it is completely up to dd.

Yes, some workbooks and you guiding her through any difficult "types" of questions should be fine.

One of dd's primary classmates is a definite intellectual and goes to top 10 private secondary school but she failed to pass the 11+, much to everyone's astonishment.

If your dd is bright enough to cope with a Grammar school it would be a shame if she failed for the sake of a bit of exam preparation.

It also makes it a more level playing field with all the other tutored children, sadly.

This may sound funny but a friend's DD said she didn't really want to go to the girls' grammar school, didn't want to go to an all girls, didn't think she liked it, but couldn't be more specific. It turned out she was worried about failing the exam and everyone knowing she'd failed.

She did pass and was absolutely delighted, and suddenly the girls' grammar was the only school she had ever wanted to go to!

Mrsm- I hate to say it, but without tutoring she will not get in where you are. It isn't just about being bright, it is about being prepared, and being better than all the other applicants. There are over 20 applicants for each place, many who do not pass are extremely clever, just beaten on the day by other extremely bright children.

Rather may well be correct that she is scared of failing- she probably has heard how stiff the competition is.

I know it would be extremely difficult, but even just 6 sessions in the lead up to the exam would help. Is there a family member/friend who could help?

Maybe the best way of assessing her capability would be to speak to a few tutors- most have reputations based on their pass-rates, and wouldn't take on pupils who were not going to pass- and they don't need to as they are so in demand tbh.

I know her school is highly unlikely to give you an opinion on whether she is capable of Grammar school work, (annoys the hell out of me, as this is LEA policy, yet the grammars we are talking about are LEA schools! ) but perhaps her class teacher is symapthetic enough to give you her personal view, off the record?

BTW, if she decides to go for it, she shouldn't just do the one- she should do the other schools' entrance exams too, as there are school buses that run from many areas to the schools, and lots of children go to one slightly further afield, because pass marks can vary slightly year-on-year.

Feel free to CAT me if you want to talk more about it.

Those levels are definitely indicative of grammar school potential, OP. Level 5s in Y6 are what they are looking for and with a little push in maths your DD will clearly be there or thereabouts.

As to whether it would suit her, that?s a tougher question, but if she?s not that keen on the school your DD1 attends, it sounds like it might be worth a shot. Do you know anyone at the grammar who could chat to your DD about it?

Thank's all. that was realy helpful.

Have spoken to dd some more and I think she is going to leave it and not sit the 11+.

I am confident she will do well at which ever school she goes to, so I am happy with that.

I am considering sending my ds to Liverpool college. He is currently year 5. I have heard negative comments in the past, but am wondering if it has improved. Does anyone have any thought, please.

Mummytomum: what's your alternative?