DC (aged 4) due to start school in a month and I'm not sure

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I'm just wondering if anyone could share their experiences or insights into deferring a 4 year old starting primary 1.

My DC is 4, and is a late February birthday, so will almost certainly be the youngest in his year. He is due to start school in a month's time but I'm feeling anxious about it. His school is lovely and he is excited about going although doesn't really know what to expect. When he was at preschool they said he was ready for the challenge, totally fine to start etc, although he's obviously not been to preschool for 4 months now. My family is full of teachers who all say he's fine to go.

I just can't shake the feeling he's not ready and it's too young. He isn't interested in reading or writing, although his maths and spoken language are great. He is quite mature and sensible in many ways although lazy - doesn't want to dress himself etc. His friends are going this year and I'm worried he'll miss them loads. I have everything set up in terms of working hours/pick ups etc, have bought the uniform.

I'm so torn - does anyone have any experience either way? I don't want to disadvantage him if he's not ready and doesn't thrive, but at the same time it feels like a huge deal to decide to defer now.

I’d be tempted to hold back your little one given the current circumstances too but I’m not you. Would a year extra at pre-school be more difficult for your family circumstances? Is your child all excited about going to school? Trust your gut is what I’d say

I deferred both of my boys, Jan/Feb birthdays. We're at a state primary in the central belt and the majority of parents defer. They benefited from the extra time in nursery and I feel more confident about them moving on to secondary, not being the youngest. I have lots of teachers in my family and all said deferred children do much better, one - a headteacher - said 'giving them the gift of maturity is the best thing you could do'. Research shows that the later children start school, the better their outcomes are on all fronts.

I'd defer. I know it's relatively common, but even so I'd hate to start uni or a job yet not be old enough to drink alcohol or go out with friends. This will be particularly difficult if your children go to a uni frequented by people from the rest of the UK with different age cut offs and they spend half of their first year (or more if they go after s5) not being able to fully participate in "life" from a non academic perspective. I'm English but went to Edinburgh - the majority of my friends had deferred or had had a gap year after finishing school so they were 18 but there were a few people who hadn't and I always felt so sorry for them when we were going out. Even if they're "ready" now, I'd put it off for a year so they don't get to adulthood too soon or strongly encourage a year out before starting adult life after school!!

I think this is being over thought. My DS is in January and he did just fine. Unless the nursery had any development concerns I wouldn’t hold my child back.

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Unlikely to get funding now for gbis year im afraid and it's at the discretion of the LA - some great, some notoriously bad.

I deferred my Jan DS and don't regret it at all.
My reason for deferring was also influenced by every teacher I knew who had a jan/feb birthday DC deferring their child. I figured they knew what they were doing.

I didn’t defer. Mostly cos I felt she was ready, and I was a young one for my school - my mum, a headteacher actually sent me early (I’m a march baby). I did fine, so I wasn’t particularly worried about her being a young one for her year.

However - my mum a primary headteacher said she always felt boys benefited more from being deferred, and most of my friends who had boys did defer.

Either way, am sure your son will cope. The first couple of years are really about getting used to school and learning through play.

My DS2 was late Feb and I didn't defer as he was ready for school and desperate to join his big brother.
The only time I've wondered if that was the right decision was when he didn't do well in S6 which wasn't helped by his lack of maturity.