There were a couple of threads asking about relationship counselling earlier and I have just started on this today so thought I would make a comment.
I really wasn't sure about the whole thing but knew I was in too deep with marriage problems to be able to solve them myself. My concern about counselling was that I didn't want to go through the effort of making a connection with a counsellor and then finding s/he wasn't on my wave length so would need to go to someone else etc. I just thought my H would get impatient if that happened and then that route to solving our problems would be finished.
So I phoned Relate and they suggested telephone counselling with a person from the local branch so that if it goes well we can switch from phone counselling to meeting up. So I had my first today on my own and I found it so helpful. She completely validated my feelings and accepted them in comparison to my H who can be dismissive - hence our problems. We have a plan for another session on my own, then H will have a session on his own, then she will start phone couselling with us together over phone still. As long as H agrees to this I feel really optimistic that it will help. Help us get the love and closeness back, or help to move towards acknowledgement that we cannot do this if that is the case.
I can't say the relief I feel, it is immense. Just to think there is light at the end of the tunnel.
Maybe others would find this route helpful too