Is there anyway that I can make this better?

[FlounceyFlossam]

I've posted before about DP's family. But it is still bothering me, and I know it is DP too. They don't bother with us really at all, have seen DS 3 times, for perhaps a total of 10hrs max since he was born 8 months ago. They never ring either - they haven't phoned in 2 months. DP always phones them. Ds is never asked after.

I know I moan about DP but I cannot fault the love and pride he has in DS. He adores him. And he adores his family. And it makes me really sad. He is so loyal to them that he sometimes makes out he dosen't mind his mother not bothering - but he does.

He has a brother just less than a year younger than him. Basically DP has been pushed to one side since he was a tiny baby IMO. The way she describes DP when she talks about him as a child, her pregnancy, thinks he got up to she describes so negatively and with a sneer on her face. BIL meanwhile never does wrong really, when in reality he is a right sod! In family photos she wraps her arms around BIL, DP is just left sat there.

I know there is nothing I can do really, but I just wish his parents could see how much he loves them and how their actions do hurt him. And I wish I could change it for him. He gives them all this love and yet seems to get nothing in return.

Hi Floss, sorry you are having a hard time here with dp's family. I've come to the conclusion that family is just your immediates ie. you, your dp and your ds after that people just are there or not as they wish. I am cynical cos I don't like MIL or SIL but my family are OK and just wrapped up in their own lives. Take care Floss and think about the immediate family, not the extended!!!!

My DH continues to be loyal and loving to his Father who left them when they were young and barely shows any interest whatsoever in him or our kids now. I feel so sad for dh. But he says he'll continue to behave how he believes is right, no matter how his dad behaves. Commendable, if you can do it.

I couldn't do it. I do wonder if one day he will just blow up at it all.

He has had longer to get used to it that you remember. Hurtful though, isn't it, to what our dh/p's have had to overcome?

True sm. But that would suggest he realised as a little boy and that it sad too.