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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Husband signed up to dating website

183 replies

ShockedBeyondBelief · 04/01/2010 15:09

I've name changed as I post a bit in other topics and don't really want mumsnetters or people in RL to know about this.

I found out at the weekend that my husband has joined an online dating website, specifically looking for sex. He says it was a stupid mistake, that he hadn't contacted anyone and he wasn't planning to.

But obviously even if that's true, I'm still pretty gutted, although am feeling a bit detached and unemotional right now.

I have held my hands up and said I'm partly responsible for this, as our relationship has been very up and down and sex life pretty sporadic since we had our 20-month-old ds.

What do I do now? I have no idea how to move on from this. I don't feel I can tell RL friends as I don't want them to hate my husband. Has anyone been in a similar situation?

OP posts:
MitsubishiWarrioress · 07/01/2010 23:44

I think what the OP's H did was a sad error of judgement. And you have every right to feel betrayed SBB.

My marriage broke down horrendously over some crap issues, but sex had been a major problem for a very long time. I have quite a high sex drive and it is horrible. Really horrible. Not just the physical ache of wanting the sexual urge to be satisfied, but the sense of frustration at it being there all the time.

It is not a choice, but I do have to work very hard at switching it off. I don't know what I would have done if the opportunity to just get rid of the bloody feeling had been an 'easy' option.

It is like hunger for food, it can get to a point where in the end you would eat stuff just for the sake of making the gnawing ache go away. It can become very consuming.

I didn't go anywhere else, I am 'quiet', loyal, faithful, thought I had high morals and have gone out of my way through life not to hurt anybody. My 'H' was a drink fuelled roller coaster with jealous rages (through out our relationship) and screwed me up so badly, (bad metaphor) I am on AD's and having counselling. I also fell (very sadly) for someone else.

I have done nothing about it. I do not think this makes me better than your H SBB, because even now there are times when it gets so intense that if I was in the wrong place at the wrong time, I would struggle to keep hold of my morals.
I am awake now because it is driving me mad. And I am alone.

That he tried a site as you describe suggests to me that he just wanted a release. This does not justify or excuse his actions in any way, but it might be a root to what he was doing.

That he and yourself reached this point is sad. I think I am a good woman mostly, and it is bloody sad that I felt that way, albeit for different reasons.

If you want to get passed it, and FWIW, I think you should try to, then maybe in a tiny way, knowing that he just wanted to satiate the need might help you to move forward.

It really is a horrible feeling, and in some ways I wish I could have just gone somewhere and get rid of the need because now I have something far more to contend with. And that is feelings for a guy I shouldn't have. A broken EA marriage and a long way to go before I will be in a position to look at a future that might hold a good, kind loving partner who takes the ache away.

AnyFucker · 08/01/2010 07:15

MW, I really hope that your situation starts to look up very soon...

purplepeony · 08/01/2010 09:05

MYODD- sorry, you're wrong. This is not the place to "defend" myself, but you are barking up the wrong tree.

MitsubishiWarrioress · 08/01/2010 14:48

...thanks AF...

datesitenamechanged · 08/01/2010 15:13

Have name changed, obviously.

A couple of years ago, we went through a very difficult patch. My dp was involved in a very stressful situation at work, and this coincided with a difficult family situation for me and a lot of weight gain (personally).

One evening feeling unloved, neglected and unlovable, I went on a dating site. I submitted a profile and a photograph.

A couple of people tried to contact me, and suddenly I felt better about myself, and simultaneously ashamed.

I never responded, I deleted all my history on the site, and I know that if my dp ever found out about what I had done he would be appalled. He would be be as worried as the OP is. But, just for a little while, I felt desired and desirable. It gave me back my confidence, and it allowed to to be supportive to my dp.

I hope he never finds out because he would feel betrayed. If my dp found out now, I think he would understand, if he had found out at the time, he would probably have left.

I know that what I felt for myself was self-pity. There are no excuses, but sometimes there are explanations. Only you know the real strength and importance of your relationship. Keep true to yourself and to your love for each other.

bruceb · 08/01/2010 18:51

wow datesite......brave statement, even with a changed name

ItsGraceAgain · 08/01/2010 21:48

datesite - Massive props and thanks for your post

"There are no excuses, but sometimes there are explanations."

One of life's more important truths. Explanations have their own meanings within the context of each relationship. Glad you & DP on on the mend!

ItsGraceAgain · 08/01/2010 21:50

*are on the mend

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