is he not interested?

[susia]

ok so I am a lone parent and have begun to forget what it is like to fancy someone or signals if they fancy me...

I started recently finding my son's swimming teacher attractive. He's always very friendly but don't know if he likes me. Last week he started telling me how his son is the same age as mine and how he sees him once a week since he divorced. Later on my son who's six said that he'd asked him what I do for a job.

Anyway he was standing in the communal showers while I was washing my son's hair (bit bizarre...)and he started a conversation about what I do for a job, where I lived etc. As they were about to close the pool, so we had to rush I said we'd be outside in the cafe after if he wanted to join us (as we always are after the lesson). He said yes and that'd be nice. But when we got there he said he had to rush off because he was picking up his son for the day.

Bit confused really, don't want to give him the impression I'm after him if he's not interested...

[susia]

I know it's a bit of an unimportant issue just wondered what you all think

[JeremyVile]

I think its too early to judge. Carry on as you are, let him know casually that he's always welcome to join you in the cafe afterwards and see how he responds.
Good luck.

[susia]

thanks, wondered why he said yes then changed his mind. Maybe he thought 'oh no, she fancies me!'.

[hobbgoblin]

Maybe he forgot the time?

Let him ask you next time, he knows you're up for a bit of social interraction at the very least so shouldn't be afraid to ask.

[diddl]

Well, if you don´t give the impression that you´re interested, how will he know?

So you´ve done that I think by saying he could join you in the cafe.

Next move to him, I would say.

[BEAUTlFUL]

I wouldn't worry too much: it could easily have been that he was just busy.

But don't think and wonder about it. My new mantra is "A man doesn't exist unless he is asking me out", so I wouldn't give him any mental head-space until that happy day when he asks you if you fancy a drink one night.

[susia]

yes you're all right - there's no way of knowing. In the meantime, I will see him on Friday when I go for a swim. Hope he is ok and it's not awkward.

[Monty100]

He might have just had a phone call to pick his ds up earlier or something. All will be revealed in time.

[susia]

well I just saw him again this week and we had a friendly chat but that was it...so guess he isn't interested then. Shame.

[neenz]

Not necessarily! Just keep chatting, keep smiling... he is probably trying to work out whether you like him.

Just keep being friendly. I think it sounds like he definitely likes you if he is asking your LO about you

[susia]

thank you neenz. I would like to think that but this week he said he'd finished now for the day while we were showering...(bit odd the communal showering thing!) and didn't suggest coffee or anything. don't feel I can do it again.

He always texts me in the week to ask if my son is having a swimming lesson (as he does probably with everyone) this week he signed his texts thankx but I read it as thanksx stupidly!

[Snowtiger]

Is there any way you can find out if he does text others to find out if their DCs are having swimming lessons? It'd be a good way of finding out if you're getting special treatment. FWIW I think he does sound interested, but probably wary as he's divorced himself and not sure if you're interested or just being friendly. I'd carry on being friendly and chatty and smile a lot and see what happens...! Good luck!

[susia]

thank you, I wish I could find out if he texts others but don't know other people who have lessons with him. It's just done on a week by week basis - in that we don't arrange when on the weekend the lesson will be till he texts me on thursday or friday.

its a bit strange really as I'm swimming alongside them in the next lane while my son is having his lesson (so I can get a bit of exercise too).

wish I had an excuse to text him about something else instead of when the next swimming lesson is!

[susia]

at least if he does fancy me, he'll have already seen me in my swimming costume so won't be put off!

[neenz]

lol

[susia]

wish I could find out one way or the other...it's really annoying.

[Snowtiger]

Just keep turning up, keep smiling and let him make a move - if it's meant to be....!

[humblemum]

Give me his number, I will txt him for you... Hi do you fancy Susia or not? should do it!!!