i know this probably sounds silly its just that i can never let anyone in close except my 2 ds' and i know i need to change this but how?
I think i know the reason why, because everyone important has always left me or hurt me and i am scared on a level that i cannot help but be wary of people.
My mum left when i was 5, then my dad started being violent, one best friend was taken away by ss, one best friend moved abroad, i then went to a dif school to all my junior school friends and lost contact, my nana died, then a teacher who was amazing to me "washed her hands of me" (in her words!), i was very naive and vulnerable with men when younger, then my only 2 serious partners both moved city and changed all contacts when i fell pg both times.
I am over it and i know its not my fault and its just the way life goes sometimes but apart for ds' and my best best friend ever (but only her to a degree) i cant ever seem to let anyone else close to me, i just want to be able to trust people again and not let my two sons become like this it would really upset me.
Basically i just want advise on how to open up to people more and let them get to know me better as i am a very friendly person, have friends just not very close friends, see family every now and then and have a very happy home life with my boys but id like to make new friends ect but at mother baby groups and at the school nursery gates i can only ever seem to make idol chit chat and never make any new friends, any ideas?