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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Feeling a little wobbly

9 replies

norksonmywitchesbroomstick · 30/10/2009 08:57

Long history, but basically after 9 months Dh and I are working hard on getting back together.

Today I am going to ring the benefits office and cancel my benefits( have been down this road before) so feeling a litle wobbly.

Please reassure me I am making the right decision

OP posts:
Original poster
norksonmywitchesbroomstick · 30/10/2009 09:33

Well the phonecalls have now been made, I now have no income and have jumped in with both feet

Feels weird as I am not telling anyone in RL as not sure they would support my decision

OP posts:
Avendesora · 30/10/2009 14:34

Good luck!

anonymous85 · 30/10/2009 14:35

Goodluck. Not sure what you went through in the past - but for a fresh start leave the past in the past.

yournotalone · 31/10/2009 14:43

Please look at my thread. I still have my inner core. xx

Original poster
norksonmywitchesbroomstick · 01/11/2009 11:23

Sorry to hear your story yournotalone, things are slowly progressing here following lots of counselling, individual and couple.
It is more taking the final steps that gave me the wobbles, putting myself in a vunerable position for the first time in nearly a year.
I hope you find the strength to do what you need to. Don't leave it to him, make a decision for you and your DS's

OP posts:
GypsyMoth · 01/11/2009 11:27

i had a second try with my ex....best thing i ever did cos i just knew it would never work,its like after a time apart,you change a bit. and i'd always have wondered. so glad i tried it,cos i feel it was good closure.
#obviously,you are hoping it goes the other way....and many MNers have done that sucessfully,so good luck!

norksinmywaistband · 01/11/2009 11:46

I agree tiffany, until we grab the bull by the horns so to speak and give it a go we will never know if it will work.

Things are great atm, but he is not living here.

Hopefully by gradually building things up, we can address any issues that arise from having changed while apart.
We have both changed quite a bit, thanks to the individual counselling. We are getting to know the new us and seeing as the old us was obviously not working - I can only keep my fingers crossed.

AnyFucker · 01/11/2009 13:05

good luck norksy

even if others in RL would not support your decision, make sure that you keep up with friendships etc

don't put all your eggs in one basket, you may need some support further down the line if this doesn't work out

norksinmywaistband · 01/11/2009 13:11

Thanks Anyfucker - By not speaking about things in rl, they are very supportive of our plans to get back together, and have been my salvation over the past year - but do not think they would se things my way as far as stopping the IS before he officially moves back - but we know we need this time

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