Is it possible to remain really good friends with childless people when you have children?

[emkana]

Or do I just know the wrong people?

I just spent a week at home in Germany and met up with my childless friends there. They totally lacked understanding for the practical implications of having children - example: They were astounded that I couldn't take my two children (four and nearly two) for an evening visit to the flat of friend number one, to then move on to flat of friend number two at about midnight. When my children were happily chatting and playing, not being misbehaved at all they said "God, emkana, you really must have nerves of steel to be able to cope with this." And the whole time I spent with them they didn't see any need to ask me any questions about my life, presumably because I'm "only" a SAHM so what could I possibly have to say?

Grrrr.
I used to be so close to these women...

PS. Sandyballs, sorry about the example of the sofas, I would have not included if I had seen your post first.

I suppose it helps that I always visited my best friend, so I was on her territory (I have cats, she has a dog - plus is slightly allergic to cats, so it was always easier forme to go to her). Al aways considered myself as a surrogate auntie and continue to be interested in what her four kids are up to (dh and I are godparents to her 4th).

But on the other hand, I had a row with my (childless) brother when he got annoyed with me comforting my ds (4.5), who had just broken an antique (ish) glass dessert bowl when he had pulled his table mat off the table by accident (this was at my parents, I had been tucking his napkin in and he had slipped off the chair, and in trying to clmaber back on had pulled the table mat with the result that his dessert went flying and the dish smashed). It was an accident for goodness sake - and it is certainly not up to thim to tell me off for comforting rather than scolding ds!

I might have been not very exact at my last post... Trying to remember what had happen, it was not exactly like that. The toddler had kicked the do in previous occassions and that last time I had put the dog in her kennel to avoid the problem, and the mother came, she put her toddler inside of the kennel, where the toddler hugged the dog so hard she started gasping.

I understand that accidents may happen, is the frequency what makes all the difference, in our case, this boy caused all that damage in just two visits. If it had been spread over several months maybe things would have been different.

I have to admit I prefer, now my dd is 14 months, to have people visit us. My flat is practically accident proof now, I have moved everything she can't touch ans she can pretty much do what she wants!

I will obviously take her to others houses but as they are not set up for toddlers (understandably as they don't have any!) I do have to keep a fairly close eye on her. After all anything she can reach is fair game (in her opinion) at this age and she doesn't appreciate being restrained!

Generally my friends are happy to come and see me as it makes us easier to talk freely or meet up in the evenings without the wee one. They love dd though and help me out a lot which is really helpful as I am a single mum.

Sorry to hijack you here weesaide! How did your wedding invite go did you make it? Just finding my way round all the boards and have seen you posting again, I drift everywhere and then forget I've posted messages. Can't beleive your dd is now 14months time flys doesn't it! Well ds turned 6 today and dd was 2 a fortnight ago. Seems strange having a 6yr and 2yr old at 23.