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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

DP being a pain in the !!!!!!!!

6 replies

3peasinapod · 16/08/2009 22:23

Me and DP have deceided to get married. We have kids and been together for 11 years. So today when i asked a few question like who is going to be witness and about food afters he reply was ya whatever you want. I have asked a few times about different things and its always the same answer. We both deceided to get married, when i questioned him as to if he still want to do it he said yes. It going to be a small wedding family only, so its not going to take alot but i would like his thoughs and help.
This has now turned into a huge row and i am pretty fed up with DP.
Sorry but need to rant

OP posts:
HolyGuacamole · 16/08/2009 22:41

I think most of the planning of a wedding gets done by the female.....but....he should be showing some sort of interest.

3peasinapod · 16/08/2009 22:50

No interest at all. Feel like he doesnt want to marry me because his lack of interest. We are now not talking, we have a meeting with the register tommorw and i am going to cancel that. After the show down today i dont even think it is a good idea to get married.

OP posts:
HolyGuacamole · 16/08/2009 22:54

Wedding planning can be so stressful and TBH men aren't the best when it comes to details - not making excuses but it is just so much more exciting for women (generally). Why don't you sit him down and have a good, honest talk about the whole thing. TBH it is really shit if you are so excited and he is half hearted about it. I mean you can't really expect him to be excited about colours of bridesmaids dresses or whatever, but the basic things like invites etc, he should be part of that.

You need to not fall out about it tho. It's supposed to be the happiest time of your life.

3peasinapod · 16/08/2009 22:59

There really is not alot of planning, we are doing it in the registery office. All that has to be sorted is

Date and time
Afters meal (which is only a family meal)
Witnesses

I'll sort my cloths and DCs and his suit and thats it.

Not alot to it, just need to know when it would suit and where does he fancy having a meal after.

OP posts:
nje3006 · 17/08/2009 02:18

If there's not a lot of planning and he says do whatever you want, what's wrong with that? Most guys don't get involved in the detail, specially for a small wedding.

You can tell him (lightly) that when he doesn't show much interest it feels like he's not mad keen to get married.

Was there a big proposal? Was he keen to get married?

PrincessLayer · 17/08/2009 02:42

Sounds exactly like my DP before he was my DH.

DH is a fairly simple soul, and doesn't like to make too many decisions. I often think he would starve to death if he had to plan meals.

Think of somewhere you have eaten before that he seemed to like (in my case, anywhere that does a decent curry). Ring his boss and ask if there are any dates he "cannot" have off.

Put him out a clean shirt and tell him what time to turn up.

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