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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Can depression make someone angry?

5 replies

Supercherry · 26/05/2009 21:09

The ex has just phoned to tell me he's been diagnosed with depression after going to GP about his anger issues.

Mmmm, am I right in thinking he's just trying to put doubt in my mind about his agressive behaviour while we were together? Is he after sympathy? Or could he have a point?

OP posts:
Ready4anotherCoffee · 26/05/2009 21:12

I'm sorry, I don't know your situation, but I've been told that depression be to do with repressed anger, and in my case, was.

FabulousBakerGirl · 26/05/2009 21:13

Yes it can.
You clearly don't believe him though so maybe you need to talk to him some more.

mrsboogie · 26/05/2009 21:21

Oh yes, very much so. And the other way round - anger that hasn't been dealt with causes depression.

mrsboogie · 26/05/2009 21:23

that does not mean that he is not responsible for his aggressive behaviour towards you in the past

OptimistS · 26/05/2009 22:00

Agree with mrsboogie. Depression is expressed differently in different people, but can definitely manifest as aggression. However, as mrsboogie points out, that is not a get-out-of-jail-free card for your ex's behaviour. Depression may have made him angry, but choosing to direct that anger at you was a conscious choice.

Unless you and your ex want to get back together, it is not appropriate for you to be the one supporting him through this. He should rely firstly on himself (the most valuable lesson a depressive ever learns), hopefully with help from friends and family, but definitely not with help from a relatively recent ex for all sorts of valid reasons.

HTH

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