Hi... I've never posted on this thread before but I put the following post on the step-parenting thread, and someone suggested I also post it here for a bit of perspective. I hope I'm not intruding...
My DP has two young DC's and I am 25weeks pregnant. Things are tricky with his ExP, so I don't really get to see his children (who live 200miles away) but he goes away every weekend to see them.
Things have been really tough with DP and I at the moment. It doesn't help that we have no real quality time together etc. But the thing that's really upsetting me is the amount of time he spends at his ExP's when he goes up to see the children.
He will often go and spend whole days there, while she is there too. He even slept there once when she went out for the night. I just phoned him, and he told me he's spending the morning there (His Mum lives about a minute's walk away, so it's not as though he has no where else to go). When her sister had a baby recently, he told he'd become "an Uncle".
I have to be honest...this makes me feel really uncomfortable. He tells me he "has to" maintain an emotional relationship with his ExP for the sake of the children. Is this acceptable? Can he have an emotional relationship with both of us? I have tried to be understanding, but it seems he is always searching for excuses to be there, and she always rings "for a chat" when he's here in the week. I know he rings 2/3times a day to speak to hs kids, but I also know that she rings when the kids aren't with her/are in bed.
Am I totally irrational to feel uncomfortable by this behaviour? I have no family experience of step-children, and no friends who are steps, so really don't know what is normal/acceptable? He also recently told me that he is scared o love out baby because of his other 2 children, which totally broke my heart.
Thanks in advance for any response? I REALLY need to hear what others have to say on the matter. At the moment I just feel so dispondent. I feel as though I just want to take my baby and run