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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

why do they always have to drag me down?

31 replies

Titania · 31/03/2005 18:36

i fell out with my mum and sister about a year ago now. Every so often i get a text or a phone call off my sister telling me what a pathetic little bitch I am. I have just had a full scale row with her on the phone where she told me I was a twisted, sick in the head, pathetic little bitch who couldnt stand is cos I wasn't mums favourite.... I am just on the phone to my mobile company now to try and get my number changed. I am so fed up now. Just when I was starting to feel as though I was getting somewhere. It's really upset me

OP posts:

coppertop · 31/03/2005 18:42

Oh no. This is the last thing you need.

How did she get hold of your number? Or is it the one you've had for a long time?

I think that if she does manage to ring again, either don;t answer it or just hang up as soon as you realise it's her. Her behaviour is unacceptable IMHO and very childish.

mummytosteven · 31/03/2005 18:45

i guess it's a control thing with her - that she likes to have you available to bully at least she shouldn't have your new address/phone number, and if you can put call barring on your phone that will stop her calling for now.

Original poster

Titania · 31/03/2005 18:53

ive had it for a long time. i have just managed to get it changed.....was crying down the phone to the operator and she was lovely.

I just find it really hard....theres always something to drag me back down.

OP posts:

scottishmumto1 · 31/03/2005 18:59

i fell out with my auntie and cousin a year ago and even though i think sometimes i would like to speak to them again i know they would make me feel like crap even though they are in the wrong.
i am really sorry for you titania but just remember they are acting like kids when they call you nasty names like that.
lots of hugs to you.

WestCountryLass · 31/03/2005 19:23

Sounds like your sister us tge twisted one

Original poster

Titania · 31/03/2005 23:11

I just can't stop crying now.....I feel so....I dont know.....

OP posts:

dropinthe · 31/03/2005 23:15

Ignore her and pick yourself right back up to where you were at!

Original poster

Titania · 01/04/2005 09:32

I didn't sleep last night cos I was worrying about it all. The phone company haven't changed my number yet so I have recieved another load of abusive text messages in the night.

OP posts:

sweetmonkey · 01/04/2005 09:41

You poor thing.i had the same problem with my alcoholic mum. now if she phones i just let it go to answerphone. i dont speak to her anymore. if you can jut delete the texts straight away.go into the message try not to read it (easier said than done i know) and delete them. stay strong, ive noticed how much better and happier you ve seemed lately. are the kids all sleeping again now?

Original poster

Titania · 01/04/2005 09:43

not really. ds2 was up at lot last night...this back tooth is taking forever to cut through and he is full of a cold hte poor thing.

OP posts:

sweetmonkey · 01/04/2005 09:45

I rally feel for you. have you tried phoning the phone company again. maybe if you explained situtation then they might act a bit quicker

Original poster

Titania · 01/04/2005 09:46

yes....they said it can take up to 24 hours..

OP posts:

joash · 01/04/2005 09:52

I'm so sorry that you're going through this. I waited until I was 36 before finally dropping the majority of my family and they were very cowardly - abusing my kids rather than having a go at me. Although it doesn't help you at the moment, my advice would be to simply ride it out - don't let them know that it bothers you, I used to just say things like "Oh dear, having a bad time again..." then hang up. Admitedly, I'd then go away and have a good cry or get very angry (but they gained no satisfaction at all, because they thought I wasn't bothered). Don't get into arguments with them - it's just playing their mind games.

Apologies in advance for this (they are your family), but if someone has the sort of childish, pathetic personality where they won't let anything go and refuse to listen to reason - you're not going to change them. They obviously have something extremely lacking in their lives to make them want to continuously pursue an argument or abuse you.

Walk away, ignore it and if all else fails - report it to the police. I actually took my mother to court and have never looked back. {{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}

sweetmonkey · 01/04/2005 09:53

Well just stay strong.i'll prob be on here all day , so if you wanna chat im here
x x

Original poster

Titania · 01/04/2005 10:04

thank you. theres nothing like an arguement with someone like her to make me feel once again totally worthless......

OP posts:

sweetmonkey · 01/04/2005 10:18

well you are not worthless.from what ive read about you it is obvious you are a lovely caring person who loves her kids and just finds it hard sometimes. we all feel that way as we are all human. you WILL be ok. you are strong
x x

Original poster

Titania · 01/04/2005 10:19

Am going to sign off for now....feel low now and I'm not very good conversation....bye x

OP posts:

sweetmonkey · 01/04/2005 10:23

come back later if you feel like talking,take care and remember there are lots of people on here that care about you
x x

Spacecadet · 01/04/2005 10:43

What bitches, sounds like they are childish ones, twisted too abusing you thisway, i would be tempted to send them a text telling them that if they send you any more filth you will show it to a solicitor.Dont let the buggers get you down, you are not worthless, they are.

Original poster

Titania · 01/04/2005 16:45

thanks. its like you day though....100 people can say your great and it only takes one to make you feel like crap again. have had a horrid panic attack this afternoon....very wobbly again now....

OP posts:

sweetmonkey · 01/04/2005 16:51

oh dear.have you had any more texts or calls or have they changed the number now?

Original poster

Titania · 01/04/2005 16:53

nothing that i know of but then ive turned my phone off now. they havent changed the number yet

OP posts:

sweetmonkey · 01/04/2005 16:54

how are you feeling now?

Original poster

Titania · 01/04/2005 16:59

shakey....dizzy...drained....very unsteady in mind and body....apart from that fine....

OP posts:

sweetmonkey · 01/04/2005 17:02

when is yr dh due home.would he be able to give you a break from things or at least a big hug!!!!.sorry for all the questions, im just trying to see if i can help in any way. (not doing a very good job im afraid)

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