Am I odd to have joint bank accounts with DH?

[TheSweetLittleBunny]

We have always had joint accounts, any money earned by either of us goes in the account(s)and all direct debit, bills, shopping etc comes out of it. We freely take money out of each other's purse/wallet, pockets etc.
It's just that I was having a conversation with someone who said "it's your money and you can do what you want with it". And I found it a surprising stance to take, surely it is "our" money not "mine" or "his". This person equally thought I was crazy to have a joint account with dh

as with so much in life, I agree with cmotdibbler

but I can see this might not work if there was a big income disparity and/or a SAHP involved

Similar to others, we have a joint account for bills and our own accounts that our salaries go into. When I wasn't working, I took money from our savings (money that we'd put aside for that purpose) to cover my personal spending. I didn't ask to do that but I let DP know when I took money.

He can be funny with "borrowing" money though. If he's out of cash and I have lots I try and give him some, but he always says he'll pay me back, or goes to the cashpoint. We have similar spending patterns though so never argue about money.

joint here

Pretty par for the course here too - a joint a/c for pretty much everything, and pocket money accounts individually so we can be foolish and reckless with our own money.

I don't think I judge (as in say people shouldn't do this), but I don't understand seperate accounts systems. Some relatives work this way - you pay gym membership, I pay phone bill, you pay food, I pay mortgage etc. It all seems very difficult to me, but it seems to work for them, so each to their own, I guess.

MrsB

Actually I forgot to mention that when DH was out of work for 9 months, I set up a DD so that he got some money in his account each month to be his (without it seeming like I was subbing him), and then when he got a job that was low salaried and big travelling costs the way we work things out meant that he kept most of his salary.

It might all seem a bit formal to some, but we like our independance

Joint here.

Agreed spending limit for what we spend by ourselves without checking with each other.

we have separate accounts, sound like we're in a minority

but we're not married either

I very much agree that we aren't two single people. But being in the very fortunate position (and I really do mean this, things weren't always this good by any means) that we can buy things that are solely for DS, DH or I, I don't want to be irritated because DH has had 7 Starbucks teas in 3 days, or he because I've bought another sling that we don't need, when having our own money totally eradicates that point of possible friction

Mmm hmm, agree with the majority of people here, me and DH have all accounts in joint names apart from ISAs, he even gave me a credit card on his account before we were engaged and I was only 20 (little did I know that at this point it was still his parents paying the bill though )

Hell, We even give our nanny and au pair cards from the main acocunt (though the au pairs has a lower credit limit), we trust them and they are part of our family, we know its trusting but we have had the same nanny for years and she has always been very good about only using it for genuine reasons, museum entrance, food for the children while they're out etc, the most extravaggant she's ever been was buying herself a new top after ds2 as a baby vomited all down hers about 10 minutes before she was meeting an old friend for coffee, and even then it was a plain t-shirt costing about £10!

we have individual & joint accounts (a few of each!) historically we had our own accounts anyway so kept our salaries going into them and transfered money into the joint. The reality is that it is all our money, I do all the checking and sorting of it, make sure the accounts stay in credit, pay the credit card bills etc. I'm a SAHM but we're family and it's our money, both of us are tight careful with money and trust each other 100% to spend it wisely and not fritter it away etc.

Our salaries get paid into our individual accounts. We both transfer an agreed amount into the joint account monthly whcih covers mortgage/food/bills etc. The rest is ours to do as we like with.

I much prefer it this way. He fritters his away (imho) on beer and crap, I prefer to save mine for a rainy day or the odd treat.

southeastastra - I am not married (yet) but even when I am I won't be getting a joint count. My pay is my pay, his pay is his pay. We pay our share of joint things and then spend our own money.

I don't think it's that unusual.

For those of you have seperate accounts for your salaries if you give up work to look after your child or go back to work part-time what will you do then?

I am only going back to work part-time after ML, of course I will be taking a salary drop - why should I have less money than DH for fripperies when I am taking care of OUR son?

we have joint income- comes in 1 anmount into our bank account each month as we work for same employer/ all totally shared. so much easier! we make joint decisions re how most of our money is spent too. but we are all different, eh?!

yeah good point riven, what do seperate accounters do when the kids need new shoes etc?
pay half each?

I have always had joint accounts but have been very tempted to separate them when I felt dh was profligate with his spending - fortunately the mere mention of 'separate bank accounts' was always enough to strike fear in his heart and bring him into line with his spending.

He always felt it's not a proper marriage if you have separate finances. I don't, but provided we have agreement on the relative spending and saving proportions (i.e. so long as he agrees with me ) don't much care.

Joint accounts here. Only birthday and christmas money gets kept seperate

Our joint account has a budget for clothes, shoes etc for DS. But random clothes on a 'because it's cute' rather than required, toys, books etc come out of the money of whoever feels like buying them.

This is probably a sahm/wohm thing

We have a joint account for bills and household expenses. We have separate accounts for everything else. I like it like that. If I want to buy a car, I buy one. If he wants to buy a car, he buys one. We are both adults after all. It suits us. It's not a model that can work unless both parties have their own source of income.