Partner walked out, easier to meet new man + have dream life if i abort his baby?

[kleio]

I found out i'm pregnant; it's a contraception failure. Not sure about abortion and/or trying to get a new life. I'm still quite young; don't have my career established (in process); i wanted to have kids in my 30s and live in the country and give up work to be there for my children, but now it's all gone wrong with this accident. I feel really sorry for the baby-to-be messed up in this, it's growing inside me and i'm ho huming about whether to destroy it.

The man who assured me we he wanted that traditional life with me has left me after telling me i had ruined his life and why didn't i have an abortion and not tell him? He keeps saying 'an abortion is the right thing to do'. He's stopped that now that he has and gone off with an old (prettier) friend of his who is also very traditional, but without 'baggage' and who also wants this future. So basically, whether i keep the pregnancy or terminate my partner is now my ex so my dreams are .

I don't know what to do. I don't want to be on my own.
This afternoon i was talking to a mutual friend of ours (who doesn't know i'm pregnant) who i realised was an excellent match for me, i'd never realised before, he is single and interested. Suddenly i was seeing men everywhere where before i'd seen only my partner! My self esteem sky rocketed as i realised there were definitly be other, even more suitable men out there. But if i have this child by my ex, surely, my chance of meeting someone else and having this nice future and children with him are ruined? At least for a few years? For some ladies who don't care about having a man around you might not understand my attitude, but i only feel happy when i have someone to dote on me and vice versa.

I'm over 10 weeks and was told the procedure would be quite painful...this isn't something i want to do or do lightly. It would never have crossed my mind had mr. not-so-right-anymore had not have walked out on me.

I am disliking 2009 already.

I thought it might be the same troll, as well. But I am a bit baffled as to the troll's agenda: I think what it wants is someone to condemn 'selfish' women who want to terminate their pregnancies, hence the OP getting more self-obsessed (and unrealistic) every time.

I reported this one last time too. Sounded to me like it's working on a thesis, or a novel. It's moved on slightly in that partner has now left, and she's already thinking about other men.

crap novel imo

I wondered that too - and tried to hint at it below but bottled it rather because I would hate to think of somebody in need losing out because I'm overly suspicious. It does read like the other posts - they always have quite a 'provocative' reference to abortion in the title Oh dear.

Yers, crappola if you're hoping to publish this OP

don't bother!

The reference to "ladies" and the suggestion that a termination at 10 weeks would be very painful also made me think that the OP is a man. But that could just be me.

ah soddit, I am sick to death of these blasted trolls! can we get the thread deleted then?

report it >

hold on, how do we know FOR SURE the OP is a troll?

We can't be sure. Last time MNHQ agreed that the similar threads were suspicious though. The first one was month or so back though and the story is still the same. OP hasn't actually DONE anything. If she was genuine why keep name changing?

The purpose of the posts seems to be to get people's opinions on abortion. It worries me that people are giving advice and their own stories on what is a sensitive matter. It's moved on slightly to whether men would still want her if she had someone elses baby.

My own feeling that this a bloke trying to get women's perspectives on the issue for some nefarious purpose of his own. I could be completely wrong but OP never comes back to defend herself....

portofino thanks for the explanation.

I never saw the other threads.

is this the same as the one with the woman who was PG and the BF had a close female friend who the OP thought was a better match to her BF?

at the risk of this not being a troll. tbh no one has the perfect life - trust me, and if they do on the outside you can bet damn sure they don't inside. you won't have a perfect life if you have this baby, on the other hand you won't if you don't either.

the man in all of this - well, tbh he sounds stupid have an abortion n not tell him - nice bloke there that one deffo worth holding onto . like wise if he has that attitude now what will he be like once the baby does arrive?

re the single mum/nice man thing, I've found a lovely man who's willing to take on DS as his own, he loves him to bits, and actually wants to be around both of us instead of things being such a chore. so there are some lovely nice blokes out there who won't care about the fact you're a single mum.

The other threads were by poster(s) called rainbowserpent and luxmundi - OP - if you are genuine then search the names and look at those threads because lots of good advice was given there too. If you aren't - just stop it - this is a very, very serious topic and it's cruel to muck about with it.

They've all been on the same sort of theme. Accidental pregancy, family miles away, partner not interested. Still studying/career not established. Wants kids but not til having perfect life in the country etc etc. Lots of flowery stuff too.

[http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk?topicid=relationships&threadid=674562#13722222 Link to kleio's only other thread dated 30.12]

There is a niggle in my mind that someone is using a book/film as a basis for this and just having a laugh.....But I can't place it.

Link to kleio's only other thread dated 30.12

I'll try again.

Have to say the OP's story sounded familiar when I read it. Also thought the thread title was inflammatory. Didn't post as was very suspicious.

Link to a previous incarnation

and another

Tbh I am having flashbacks to the model aeroplane story. It all sounds wayyy too contrived.

Thanks Portofino.

yes thought it rang a bell port.

shame that people mock others who have been in this situation.

She does sound mentally ill tbh/

It's horrible isn't it

I hate being duped.

Yes I think this is actually someone with an agenda other than malicious: it's possibly someone who did terminate a PG at a partner's insistence and regrets it - or it may be a man who bullied his partner into terminating and now feels bad.

I don't quite get the same vibes from Kleio as the two you posted, Portofino - and Kleio has been back.

So, Kleio, if you are genuine, I hope you get the help you need from this thread.

Northernlurker - sorry didn't see your post before I went searching for the previous threads. FWIW I searched on Phd and abortion and found them easily. Worth reporting again?