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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

MIL coming to stay

7 replies

snapD · 18/10/2008 23:51

MIL & SIL have phoned to say - can they come to stay for Christmas

I have said no - they can come on 26th/27th for a week then

They are not pleased - but we have had Christmas with my parents for the last 15 yrs.....they have never wanted to come here or invited us there

Half the time they forget a present for DD - last year, they sent soap

I feel guilty DH doesn't
I feel stressed DH would rather they didn't come & said "they are only coming because they have argued with DB"

I'm a bit at a loss as we don't really have a 'relationship'

OP posts:
childrenofthecornsilk · 18/10/2008 23:52

Don't feel guilty.

MadamDeathstare · 19/10/2008 04:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Squitten · 19/10/2008 08:12

If DH doesn't care, why should you? Don't worry about it!

compo · 19/10/2008 08:14

hang on you have had xmas with your parents for 15 years?
maybe they don't go OTT with presents because they feel upset that you have never invited them? I'm surprised your dh thinks that's okay really.

ilove · 19/10/2008 08:14

Good for you! Cheeky beggars they are...brill that your DH feels the same way as you as well

AttilaTheMeerkat · 19/10/2008 09:12

snapD

Your DH is likely correct; MIL and SIL have probably argued with DB and are looking for another free meal.

It seems as well they've never invited you to their house or even wanted to come to your house until now.

What's to feel guilty about with MIL and SIL?. Is this also out of some wish on your part for your family (mainly daughter) to have some sort of relationship with you all because of societal convention?. You need to forget that idea if this is the case. They sent your DD soap last year, what does that tell you about them?.

If your DH is not concerned why should you be?. Are MIL and SIL also going to take you up on your offer of them staying with you for a week (god only knows I would not have mine for more than 1/2 a day!).

Original poster
snapD · 19/10/2008 09:44

No - they have never invited us, we have asked to spend Christmas with them, but it means 'too many people' apparently & there would be no-where for us to stay ()& we have invited them

DH is convinced something is 'afoot' he is trying to get out of the will & that is causing upset - but we don't want a quarter of a house abroad with sitting tenants, that brings in no income, could never be used as a holiday home & if sold has virtually no value - so he is trying to 'give' it to his siblings

He should never have rocked the boat (his words not mine)

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