DH ditched sex with me after dd born...now I'm having affair...debate!

[Purplesplash]

I got fed up with begging...there's only so much begging a girl can do. I'm 40 and still look good and feel sexy. It's been a year now, so recently I hooked up with an old friend and we've been meeting up every month for fantastic sex. This is the only thing that is keeping me alive. I like DH but can't live without sex. Don't want to divorce. I have warned him a hundred times if he didn't have sex with me I would probably have an affair. Now it's happening. This is my 1st post on here and you all seem pretty judgemental, so I'm interested in your take on my situation (sometimes it's pretty weird for me too, but life is too short)

Mine and my dp noticed you didnt say you love your dh. Also in reference to the threats if you dont have sex with me I will go elsewhere... How would htat be if a man was saying to a woman? Do you think he would mind you having an affair? Are you close in other ways?

Perhaps he having an affair? Hope so.

when i ask him why he doesn't want sex he says he does then goes on to fall asleep.... such denial! It's bizarre. He must really be repulsed by me or something which of course makes me feel just lovely.

is he married/ with someone??? if so you need to think about not only your hubby but the other person who might end up hurt too!

Buttonmeup...I hope he's having an affair too..at least it would mean he's not just a weirdo. Honestly it has got to that stage where I feel that way

btw we have a 9 monh old baby and i am mostly to blardy knackered to be working out like that with dp.. when we do we do but it isnt indictive of our relationship.

maybe he looks at yopu and thinks yuk

maybe he's having an affair with another man.

ok.. knock backs are not good for slef confidence. Perhaps you shold actually sit down and talk it through. If this is such an important part of the relationsip and he doesnt want it then re-evaluate the whole deal.

expatinscotland...I think you're just trying to wind me up, but honestly I've thought about that. And thanks zippitippitoes, that's exactly how he makes me feel...are you my dh?

Purplesplash, I and other have asked you already, DO YOU LOVE HIM? Do you feel he loves YOU?

"part of the furniture" = not good at all....

what are we supposed to be debating

So what are you going to do Purple? Is there a future in you affair?

pehraps you need relate.
your relationship needs some guidance.
how old is dd?

the debate is now

troll

vs

not troll

or maybe there is no debate

rachelp73 oh god you asked the question and I don't think i do love him. I mean i would miss him if he left but i have little feeling for him other than slight irritation but also slight fondness like you would have for a dog that you've owned for ever. God now i sound like a total bitch...just trying to be honest. Anyway, can't split up..can't afford it

imo he needs good shag, are you sure you are good at it. he sounds bored to me. or got other woman.

whether troll or not it is a valid point and it does happen
no sex marriages happen
discuss

i have a kind of kick prejudice of posts that say

debate

or discuss

like im interesting

What is it you want?
Your DH back like it was before dd
or this new fella or is he just to see you through this shit time .Giving you back your confidance and doing what your dh should be doing ?

[http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/629679-anyone-else-have-no-sex-drive see]]

Have you ever had a dog? If so send dh to the kennels. That will teach him.

zippi, you're so unsupportive .

[[http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/629679-anyone-else-have-no-sex-drive see]

dammit

alright, sorry for the "debate" bit...was just feeling flippant. it's all a bit of a head fuck for me. Affair going nowhere but that's fine by me.