Signs your husband hates you

[Tinkerbell98]

How can someone tell if their husband hates them? Are there certain behaviours or signs that show they don’t love you anymore? Thanks

Absolutely the indifference. When they drop you from the priority list and act like they don’t care if you live or die. They probably don’t.

Mine tried to push me down the stairs in front of our daughter, a little memory I keep close to my heart ❤️

When they cook dinner and it’s beef Wellington?

Is it hate or resentment? Both can feel similar (I’ve experienced both in different relationships). Can you give us more context?

😮

😮

This, essentially:

https://open.spotify.com/track/3TX5dnNhGDLdAk1hXofCiF?si=zcwUZ-9NRhOZRS82pwU-UA&utm_source=copy-link

Tell us more

Blaming you for anything that goes wrong. Bad-mouthing you to your kids. Refusing to spend any family time with you. Not caring whether you consent to sex.

I think a lot of these hate signs are also signs of a narcissistic husband. Why do such men want to be married in the first place when they’re incapable of love, it really doesn’t make sense

Because it's what you can do for them, not what they can do for you.

That must have been really upsetting 😞

Not bothering to get Christmas, birthday, or mother's day presents because he didn't know you were "into that kind of thing" despite it being an issue the previous year as well.

Not bothering to get out of bed because you are able to do the whole morning routine for DS and get yourself to work so there's no point.

Not bothering to make you dinner because he wasn't sure you would want dinner that night but sorted himself and DS.

That is very true they base a marriage on how you can benefit them but it’s shocking how they can pretend to love you at first knowing it’s all an act 🤦🏼‍♀️

Small things like asking how you are and listening. I hope this is hypothetical ❤️❤️❤️

My husband will drive me places, pay for some stuff and talks to me like there’s nothing wrong. No abuse, also no affection, no sex (for going on nearly 10 years) doesn’t do any housework apart from some cooking and washing clothes. Both work full time. Talks to me like I’m stupid, not nastily just as if I couldn’t possibly know something. I don’t think he hates me but he certainly doesn’t like me. He just thinks this is it, and when I talk to him it’s like it’s not a big thing. Sorry I’m not much help.

General indifference and disinterest.
When you have friends, family, colleagues who know more and show more interest about you, your inner most thoughts, hopes and worries.
This comes after the contempt and resentment.

Sadly I can relate to all those 💐

But imagine when the one about meals extends to both yourself and your DC.

For me it was the blend of indifference and contempt. He was also very happy if I was crying or upset (which he caused).

I'm pleased that in one of our last conversations he couldn't believe how indifferent I was to his trying to manipulate me.

I hate few people in the world but I really hate him.

Mine trying to push me off a chair into broken glass was a bit of a hint.

@Tinkerbell98 I'm sorry this is happening to you.

But you say he loved you once and it may be that he has just fallen out of love with you and doesn't know how to move on, leading him to cold behaviour and mean acts. It isn't unknown or a sin to fall out of love.

Many people-men and women-who don't know what the next step is or how to get out, become horrible and spiteful.

I honestly think that every five years, each couple should sit down and have an audit of their relationship, with neither being afraid to say that they are no longer in love and want to leave-an acceptance that the love was real and right for its time but that it doesn't always last for ever.

It would still preserve the memory of a love that was real while acknowledging that it had run its course for whatever reason. I feel, in most cases, this would stop horrible behaviour as no body would feel trapped and resentful.

Apart from the guy who pissed in the bath-he sounds like a nasty piece of work

Gosh some of these stories are awful, I bet these men are an absolute delight and are lovely to strangers (especially women) as the saying goes, street angel, hearth devil

What's this?

The problem here is that YOU are a reasonable person - so you assume everyone else is reasonable. People who behave with contempt are not reasonable. Plenty of men will also straight up hate their partners but stay becuase they get free labour from them. Or, in the case of more malignant abusive sorts, becuase they actually enjoy making their partner feel unloved.

As a normal, rational, good person you might feel a chat might solve the horrible behaviour - it won’t. Because normal people don’t abuse their partner as opposed to resolving the issue. They aren’t behaving that way becuase they don’t see another option. They aren’t behaving that way because they want to.

Biggest mistake you can make is wasting your life trying to convince somebody to not treat you like shit. There is no excuse for their behaviour. As a grown adult if they can’t introspect and resolve it, no amount of you trying to have a civilised chat with them is going to change that.

Australia, poisoning- ring a bell?