Does anyone have a husband or partner with high functioning ADHD- if so, please talk to me.

[Pistachiocoffeeyes]

This may sound silly but I have diagnosed my DH with the above. He exemplifies each system on the list. I am finding him really difficult to deal with, in every way at the moment and we argue everyday. I am so exhausted, I cry daily - I cannot say anything to him without him taking it as a criticism and aggressively turning back around to me. For an example - one of many in the last 24 hours - I have reminded him that it is DS’s swimming lesson this morning that he needs to take him to and he instantly became flustered and became angry. DS has had the same swimming lesson for the past 5 weeks! Anyway, I really want to hear from other people who have someone close to them with High functioning ADHD and how you cope.

Hi OP.
No but I have it. And it's ruining my life.
It doesn't impact my DH as our lives are not that intertwined (no kids together). But in any case if I had any external pressures - even someone "nagging" at me, that would make such a difference in terms of giving me a kick up my behind.

Anyway no help to you, everyone's different...wish your DH could talk to me, might help us both

I'm sorry that's not easy. Are there ways to remind stuff without it seeming like he's failed? Like ' there is the swim bag ready', thanks for taking him I appreciate it ? '. That would make him feel less stupid?
also mine doesnt have it but as they get older they do get grumpier ! Better quality sleep may help? More protein, some specific downtime that's relaxing? More positive words might help. People with adhd often feel like a a failure 99 pc of the time anyway as most tasks are harder for them. This is my experience and my opinion trying to be helpful so don't come at me. Xx

My husband has people in his family with adhd & autism diagnosis but he doesn't want to go down that avenue as he says it won't change him so why bother .
it's very plain to see that he has the traits and in a way it is the people around him
( me ) that have to live with the consequences of it .

I’m of the view that it takes nothing to adapt to your partners challenges, particularly when you aren’t neurodivergent. We play to our strengths in our marriage.

Me, but he's not how you describe. DH knows he isn't good at time planning stuff, we both accept it's mostly my job and we respect each other's areas of greater competence. Radical acceptance!

I'm assuming you reminded him about the lesson because previous behaviour suggests he needs the reminder? If his RSD is that bad he can't cope with being told quite basic stuff like that, I'd query the 'high functioning' part.