Im really looking for some perspective before I start loosing my sanity….
Seperated from my husband last spring, and met someone new at work a couple of months later. New partner was also recently separated, we had been friends prior but genuinely no flirting etc before either had separated. We got very close very quickly, and now spend a lot of time together, talk about the future, tells me he loves me etc. our relationship is essentially perfect and I really see a future with him.
However, whilst he’s had many conversations with his ex about proceeding with the divorce, and submitted it online, he hasn’t made any official movements financially with a solicitor or mediator (for context he rents a property separately now and he has his kids there every other weekend). I feel he is really dragging his heels as he feels his ex will be difficult. She definitely pulls a lot of cards and he seems to do a lot of extra school runs etc to keep her “content” (due to logistics the three school run mornings he does results in him going in their shared house three mornings a week). He hasn’t told her he’s seeing me - unfortunately she works in a closely connected company and our company would see our relationship as inappropriate. When I talk about telling our kids we are an item etc he is dragging his heels - clearly to avoid telling the ex. He’s very concerned about her telling people at our work. He’s actively looking for a new role in our company that would mean our relationship is no longer “inappropriate”.
I am starting to get very frustrated with our lack of moving forward - he seems so concerned about his ex and is not making much progress on financially separating from her / setting boundaries in their childcare arrangements.
Am I wasting my time in this relationship? I really want to move forward and have a “normal” healthy relationship now.