My husband and I have been looking at buying a new car. We have a second DS on the way (due next week), and the current car is almost 15 years old and on its last legs.
We found a car we both liked and felt was a sensible choice, and my husband was going to purchase it.
I was busy, so he was going to go alone, but he texted his dad to see if he wanted to join, since he is always telling us he wishes to be more involved in our lives.
FIL replied, saying how upset he was that he had not been included earlier in the research process, as he may have considered providing some money towards a car, and wants to make sure it is a good car. He then proceeded to spam my husband’s email inbox with videos of which cars to avoid etc, none of them were the car we were buying.
My husband spent hours on the phone with him instead of picking up the car we agreed on, and he has agreed to hold off on getting the car and keep discussing it with FIL, as he thinks it's helpful to have financial support. We still don't have an amount or clarity on whether it's a loan, FIL just keeps saying he could help out.
We have the money to pay for the car, but it would relieve some financial pressure if he helped. However, I don’t think we should accept the financial offer, as he is being vague about the amount and keeps suggesting we need additional conversations with him about different types of cars before we purchase one.
I know his dad won't give us the money unless he likes the car. He did the same with a house we were buying - offered to help but saw something he didn't like on google maps and refused to send over the money after he had agreed to it and we had instructed a solicitor etc so had to pull out.
A gift (if it is that) of money is generous, but surely it shouldn't have strings attached? I'm finding it controlling tbh and am feeling a bit irritated and want to get this sorted before baby arrives.