Can't leave domestic abuse relationship because of my dog

[dogproblems1]

I need to leave and my friend offered I can stay with her until I find accomodation, but unfortunately I can't have my dog at her house because she has a cat. I contacted freedom who foster dogs in this situation, but they only foster if you are going to stay in a refuge and have a supported worker helping you find accomodation.

But I am not going to stay in a refuge, I will stay with a friend and I can find somewhere to rent on my own, I just need to stay a month or two with a friend so I can save up money for a deposit and first months rent. Is there no support for someone in this situation? Has anyone been in this situation and has advice?

Kennels?
No other friends or family who might help out for a limited time?

Where in the country are you OP?

Could you post on a local dog facebook group, there will definitely be people happy to help.

What kind of dog is it?

I can't afford it for that long. No other family and friends unfortunately

There are dog fostering organisations for exactly this reason.

https://www.dogstrustfreedom.org.uk/

West Midlands. I can try but I am a bit wary of handing my dog off to a rando from facebook. They can be anyone!

Mixed breed some kind of terrier

I wrote in my opening post why they can't help

I know but you could meet them for a coffee first & do a shared dog walk and go from there.

If money isn't an issue there will be dog walkers that look after dogs as well. But will likely be £50 per night so will add up.

Sorry about your situation btw ❤️

Can Womens Aid not help? I should think they would be glad that you don't need accommodation from them but could still offer support. Have you approached them? What would you like to happen?

Can you talk to your vet and see if they have anyone they know that fosters? My mother does it for people going into hospital and they don't have anyone to take care of their pet.

Freedom said they need a brief statement from a support worker confirming that you are fleeing domestic abuse and will be going into a refuge/emergency accommodation. I will call them now and ask if they can just give a statement anyway even if I am not going into a refuge/emergy accomodation, I doubt it but worth a try

I will try that, thanks

Staying with a friend is emergency accommodation.

You could also try the Cinnamon Trust - they're intended for elderly people going into care or people going into hospital, but they might be able to help or advise.

Approach a refuge and explain that your friend can't take DDog and you refuse to leave DDog with your abuser. Either the refuge workers will find you a refuge space or they will help you find a Freedom foster for DDog.

and good luck. I would not leave CatOfHate.

I know you aren’t in the South West, but please contact Refuge 4 Pets who I am sure will be able to assist in some way - they may be able to contact other nearby organisations who can help on your behalf for example.

I what your local pet fostering organisation would do if local Refuge and Temp Accom was full, as is often the case? Plus, a lot of refuges and safe houses won’t accept local referrals as the risk of location breach is too great.

Give R4P a call, they are lovely. But it is also definitely worth linking in with your local domestic abuse service anyway, for extra support.

You’ve got this - I hope it all goes smoothly for you.

Ask at your local vet if anyone is available to foster until a later date. When I volunteered for rspca I took in a huge ginger scat while his family relocated.

Meant to add i totally get it op. I left a ddog behind and it haunted me for years..

Obviously read the OP before helpfully commenting.

A huge ginger what?

@cobolliwas just trying to help. And the OP just said 'freedom' - not everyone knows it's a short version for the Dogs Trust scheme. Think you should apologise.

I tried the cinnamon trust, they said they are unable to help

That's a pity. Have countries PDSA and Blue Cross? Neither has foster schemes of their own, as far as I'm aware, but they may know of someone. Particularly the local branch.

I'm sorry but to be honest if you're having to escape from domestic violence and you can't find anywhere for a dog then I totally understand leaving them behind. Thinking about yourself and any children is hard enough in that situation, don't let a dog haunt you for you having to escape abuse💐

I'm so sorry you went through that. My parents were abusive as well and got rid of my dog one day when I was a teen, this sent me into a depression which ruined my life. So I can't leave my dog now, I just can't. Even the idea of her being with someone else for a month or two is killing me

I have been trying to help my friend who is a similar situation. We didn’t find a solution to getting her dog a foster. There seems to be more help if you have absolutely nothing (which I guess is where help is most needed) but very little help if you can manage parts of your escape on your own. I’m sorry to say we hit brick wall after brick wall but did get her & her dog out in the end.

We did get Freedom to consider her application but they ultimately advised they didn’t have any suitable foster homes available.

I’m not saying this to discourage you, OP, but rather to encourage those that can to sign up to be fosters through programs run through dogs trust. Fostering literally saves lives.

I also know this doesn’t help you immediately because applications are closed for 2025-2026 but women’s aid did have some funding available which allowed us to stretch her (meagre) savings to accelerate her leaving by funding her deposit for her rental flat and covering some of her moving costs. (This meant she could go straight into her own place instead of staying somewhere for a couple of months rent free in order to save for a deposit etc)

https://womensaid.org.uk/what-we-do/supporting-survivors/flexible-fund/

I do not know when the 2026-2027 funding cycle starts. But I believe, based on previous years, that it will open in the summer. You need to have your ducks in a row. You need to be referred by a local domestic abuse partnership as you cannot make an application directly yourself.

Check with your council as they may also have some funding streams available. Again, we seemed to make more progress if we were referred in by a domestic abuse org, rather than trying to make headway ourselves.

I wish you well.

Out of interest, is your dog a particular breed? I am a member of a facebook/whatsapp community for my dogs breed ("Chihuahuas of London"). The group has hundreds of members and people help each other out all the time, it's a really great community. I ended up fostering (and later adopting) a second chihuahua through the group.

I'm just wondering if there might be a similar group in your area that could help?