Man messing with my head again!

[BobDowne]

Posted on here a few weeks ago about new friendship/potential relationship with man. Basically everything looked (to me!) like it was heading for romance but when i went to stay with him he backed off and said he only wanted to be friends. I was upset about it but got my head around things and decided yes i didn't want to lose him as a friend, but have reduced the contact with him, ie phoning and texting not very often. Suddenly he keeps ringing almost every day again, and again saying very suggestive things. I told him he was being unfair to say things like that as we are just friends, but he's still doing it and i'm feeling very confused again!

He can only mess with your head if you let him.

he may have realised actually he does want you.

Or he could just enjoy knowing you want him.

Don't read/answer his texts for a while.

Thanks good advice NAB. Perhaps he's missing feeling like i wanted him and wants to keep playing me along. I'm having trouble getting him out of my head though and moving on.

Does just wanting to be friends mean that he wants you shag him without him committing to anything? You should ask him exactly what being friends entails, in his book, and then tell him what it means in yours.

i agree with nab and lw

ask him outright what exactly he wants from you, ask him to "define friends"

Yes i will have to talk to him about it. He doesn't want to just shag. He rang and texted me several times over the weekend - seemed quite jealous that i'd been out and asked if i'd pulled! Has also invited me to stay with him again, but it seems too soon to me for a 'friendship'. I don't think he even knows what he wants really.

because he got jealous, doesn't mean he wants more than sex though

or has he clarified he wants you for more than that?

It sounds as if he's a bit fucked up. Think carefully before you get involved

By not wanting to 'just shag' i meant there has been no sex or anything much physical. He said we should just be friends as we live a long way away from each other. It seems to me that he can't make his mind up what he really wants.