Difficult Husband

[BeLimeUser]

Been with my o/h for 6 years now. In the last 4 years husbands health has gotten really bad. Constant hospital stays with most being serious enough for intensive care stays. Husband is diabetic and through complications does not get an erection or any feeling in his penis. For him this is a big issue and i understand this. We do have toys we use so we do have some sex life. Our problem is my husband would have it every night if he could. If i say no that wont be the end of it and untill i fall asleep he will push for it several more times. Even waking me during the night to ask for it. But for me after caring for him and my 13 year old autistic daughter who doesnt attend school anymore so im home schooling, still doing all the usual things the home needs because he does nothing, no cooking cleaning or even just going to the shop, the last thing i want to do is have sex. He sees this is a big problem and often gets quite huffy and nasty. Lost count how many times ive been told im weird because i ask him to stop bloody touching me after hes been doing it all day.Im not on overly touchy feely person but hes like an octopus 24 hours a day. For the last year and a half hes changed so much to the point that sex is all he talks about even in front of the kids which understandably makes them uncomfortable. Every time i try to bring any of it up he turns it on me and its all my fault that he doesnt get anything from sex its my fault im not likes his ex's who didnt mind being touched all the time. Some days i feel like im going mad and it is me thats the problem. His thinking of a wife is shes there to be used and touched whenever he feels like it. My feelings and views to him are just me being difficult and trying to control him. He has now suggested we each find someone else to have sex with to see what it is like. Ive explained to him so many ways and times this isnt something i want but as usual he just talks over me and disregards how i feel. Anyone else with a difficult husband? /

How can someone with no feelings in their penis and who is impotent be a sex pest?! I thought that if the penis doesn't work then sexual desire would decrease. I mean he can't come?

The desire for sex and the production of semen isn't controlled by the penis. If he's got a pair of balls and a normal level of testosterone, he'll experience sexual desire.

It's also possible for men to orgasm and ejaculate without an erection.

Thank you. I did wonder and did mention he might orgasm anyway through other means.

He’s a sexually abusive to you and your children. I wouldn’t give a flying fuck the reason why. He’d be gone. I had a stepdad who made sexual remarks in front of me and my mother put up with it, it really affected my early adult relationships because I thought that’s just what men are like. He’d also do things like walk in the bathroom or my bedroom if mum was at work and as a vulnerable child I thought that’s was normal too, he never laid a finger on me and I think ny mum thought that meant it’s not abuse and just words.

I’m autistic too and your post is very worrying, your poor daughter is home all the time with him which means she doesn’t have another adult to confide in, she’s stuck with him and it’s has no control in this situation, you are legally responsible for your child’s safety and wether it’s dementia or just garden variety sexual abuser, my child would be who I prioritise, please never leave her alone with him, , if you’re going to choose to keep him in your home, then get your children some help, if you worry her telling a therapist would trigger social services or something then that should tell you he needs to leave or you need to get your children away from him. Don’t do what my Mum did and just moan and tell him he shouldn’t do it.