GF is pissed and cries over minor things

[OneSharpExpert]

So we have been living together for nearly a year and have been dating for 3 years but at times I feel like my GF just wants an argument. I have no time and energy for arguments, usually when she starts I just ignore her but they are always minor things. She would pull me over not washing a cup even tho in the past I've cleaned her stuff but I dont complain about it, I just wash it and move on. She also cried because one time after sex I went on my phone to check a message, She also cried because I was up until 2 AM in the morning and I just couldnt get to sleep.

She will also peak at my phone while im using it and she will say "jokes" like "I might get another man" or "I might not come back". She will then say that shes only joking but I cant be bothered with mind games.

Also I pay the whole mortgage, I paid the deposite for the house to get us moved in, I also go halfers on the shopping but yet she still manages to be skint. She works 25 hours a week while I do 50+ and for the next two weeks she has no money because she gets paid monthly so Im buying all the food at the moment.

Her parents were very strict and controlling so maybe thats why she is too "emotional" and cries over minor things because she lived a sheltered life but seriously, I cant be bothered with all these silly arguments and "mind games". She will also give me a small punch sometimes which aint sore and I think she is doing it as a joke but then maybe she isnt?

She's lucky that she got the opportunity to move into a house in which she doesnt have to pay for, I have layed the foundations for us to start a family and I know im not perfect but there will always be a roof over our heads and we will never go without food and I will make sure of that

When we first started dating she kept on listening to mummy and she wasnt allowed out after 1 AM, I know if I didnt come along she would never have got the opportunity to move out and she would of been still at home in her 40s with no kids looking after her parents when they get old.

I think she is a bit childless and thats because she grew up sheltered and never got into any arguments or fights so thats why she is emotional and cries over minor problems.

What do you like about her?

I mean.. you both sound terrible to me, maybe just break up and call it a day.

Leave.

This.....

Do you see a long term future with her ?

@Poppingby I like everything about her but at times its like she is looking for an argument or will cry over minor things that I did. I apologized to her because I didnt mean to hurt her just because I checked my phone after sex.

Are you the lesbian lady in an abusive relationship who usually posts?

Sounds like you hate her tbh. Presumably you knew her situation with regards to work and her income before you agreed to put down a deposit and enter into a mortgage with her.

That said, the "punching " however "jokey" it may be is unacceptable. Just leave before you bring children into what is clearly an unhappy relationship.

@Yogabearmous but then I think this is all minor stuff to be crying about. its not like im spending money on drugs, getting drunk or sleeping with other women lol.

Are you both women op? I do remember a same sex couple where one of the women was quite abusive. If that's you, you need to leave 💐

She does sound awful to be fair. Are there any redeeming features to this relationship?

She does sound annoying, but why are thinking of starting a family with her? That might be a mistake.

Is the house just in your name or both names?

@Peoplepleaserincrisis I dont hate her, I want a family and I have layed the foundations for us but at times I feel like she is playing mind games and I cant be fucked with it.

@BlueberryLatte no im a man

Op she is very insecure and manipulative- things gonna escalate only to worse in the future.

If this is genuine she sounds insane. Why would you be with someone like this this if shes really that bad?

You sound like you think you’ve saved her and she should be more grateful. Not a great basis for a relationship. Maybe that’s my she keeps reminding you she could leave, she doesn’t want to feel indebted to you.

Ah sorry - you sounded like another poster on here.

In any case, it sounds like a horrible relationship. Do not start a family! Terrible idea. I think you can do better than this relationship assuming you aren't an absolute horror yourself

@Mom221 but then I want kids and have always dreamed of becoming a family. All I want is to provide for a family and be a father. There are many qualities that I love about my GF but she needs to stop being too emotional and trying her mindgames

Why tf is the op getting all the aggro on here? If it was a man refusing to work more than 20 hour weeks, refusing to pay the mortgage, food, bills, being unbelievably controlling regarding their partners phones, threatening to cheat, and not only constantly bursting into tears to emotionally manipulate, but actually punching their partner, just imagine the replies!? Would the response still be ‘oh well it’s your fault as he was like that when you met him’??
op do NOT have children with her!

It’s not a balanced relationship: she sounds needy and manipulative and you sound like you expect her to be grateful for ‘saving’ her.
I think the situation can only deteriorate further and it’s not a healthy relationship for either of you.

She sounds awful. She’s spoilt and manipulative; just end it.

Why would you want to start a family with someone you think is "childish", "plays mind games", "starts arguments", annoyes you by "punching" you and presumably doesn't pull their weight in your eyes. If your relationship is already in doubt because of these behaviours which as you say are likely a result of her upbringing and unlikely to ever change, why on earth would you think bringing a child into is a good idea?

It would be downright cruel to bring kids into this mess op. Hard no!

Maybe try couples therapy and then see

Ask yourself why you enjoy being in a relationship where you feel so contemptful of your partner.

What does it give you to feel so superior all the time?

What might you have to feel if you were with someone working full time and secure in herself, so that when she told you to clean up your dirty dishes you couldn’t lord it over her that you were paying for everything and her life was a mess?