Told to stop being needy

[Tumblingthroughlife]

I've been in a relationship with this guy for the last 6 months . Everything's been going really well and we recently discussed moving in together in another 6 months all being well. It was him that initially brought this up . We just spent 2 weeks together, both off work , and I thought we'd had a great time. He's gone fishing today, and I thought I'd send a nice message to him saying how nice the last couple of weeks had been and that I wished we could do it all the time. He didn't respond to that but sent me another unrelated message. So I jokingly replied saying something along the lines of 'I'm glad you feel the same'. He sent me a reply saying he was busy fishing 'stop being so needy😆" with a laughing emoji. But that he'd had a nice time too. I don't know what to think and I'm spiralling. I haven't messaged him back. But I feel like this a sign that he's fed up of me . He was fine yesterday and this morning so I don't understand .

sorry to say but he’s decided he’s just not that into you. He’s immature. Move on

Could he have been joking?

You are over-thinking it but I suspect you are a bit needy.

He sent me a reply saying he was busy fishing 'stop being so needy😆"
I'd read that as 'He was fishing' (having a peaceful an relaxing time) and that he was telling you you're a bit needy on a jokey way. Not necessarily overly needy.

It is kind of needy to be asking for validation after he’s been gone a few hours after a solid two weeks together.

hmm, someone texting me after two weeks together saying they wished we could be together all the time would be a bit much for me after 6 months tbh, and then sending a sarky ‘glad you feel the same’ when he swerved it.

id personally find that too intense and like you were sitting there overthinking.

he probably did have a nice time and is looking forward to seeing you again but needs to do his own thing after a whole fortnight together

Well. I didn't message him after that and he has just messaged me saying sorry he didn't upset me and that he didn't mean for it to come across in a bad way. I do know that when he's fishing it's actually quite a lot of work to get set up and everything so I don't know, maybe he was busy?

I think he's just teasing.

He was joking

You are needy. And way too ott.

I do think the replies are right saying that I'm being too much. The problem is I read too much into everything and massively overthink stuff. He has just messaged me again saying how much of a fab time he'd had. I wish I could not overthink things and just feel confident in the relationship.

I think he was just joking about with you.

do your best to ignore the shitty posts on here x

@Tumblingthroughlife , well he likes you and seems a decent chap. You will scare him off if you are needy.
Stop the overthinking and concentrate on being a full person in your own right not half of a couple.

Did he catch anything?

He was joking ffs you need to back off abit before he makes a run for it.

Yeah, your whole reaction to this shows the truth of it. Your guy sounds chill enough to handle it if he’s able to make jokes but seriously, OP, I’d get some professional help to address your anxiety and overthinking. Not judging or having a go here - we all have our own quirks. Once you recognise and acknowledge them though, it’s good to actually address them with the help of a trained professional to avoid them adversely impacting on our personal relationships. Good luck and hope he has a lovely time fishing!

It sounds like he really enjoyed it too, I'm sure it's all good with him and he was just joking (hence the laughing emoji) this is you over thinking his jokey comment. Let it go now, relax, he enjoyed it too!

It sounds miserable being a person who overthinks OP.

I wouldn't have made an issue of him swerving your "wish we could do it all the time"

The thing is, in relationships, it's actions not words which count.

You were being a bit needy, but he was clearly trying to tell you in a lighthearted way.

If you've spent 2 weeks together and had a great time he's obviously into you.

Don't gave these sort of conversations by text. I think you are being needy personally, nit with the first text but complaining about him not saying the same straight away.

Relax. You've had two weeks together. Let him take a breath.

It sounds like it’s all going well and him texting again shows that he is thinking about you and concerned he’s upset you. I think he was just teasing you with his first reply. But you need to chill a bit to not drive him away.

If you value this relationship as much as you say you do then you need to work on yourself. The relationship is new but I suspect that your relationship anxiety isn’t.

Why is your PA aggressive “I'm glad you feel the same” supposedly a joke but his “needy” retort, can’t possibly be.

I don’t think you will be able to hide your anxious attachment indefinitely.

Poor guy. Can't you see that your passive aggressive silences and antsy ness are causing him to over explain to try to make you feel better

He's going to get very tired of this , very quickly.
I'd find a Therapist pronto.

Tnere's no point saying you read too much into everything etc etc
You're an adult. You need to stop acting like a child

He was joking and actually your response to that does come across as needy. I am absolutely NOT having a go at you, but you can see that for yourself right? He was being breezy and funny (ok, not hilarious, but off-the-cuff sardonic) and YOU started the joking style of communicating too - he just fell into that groove along with you. I don’t know what it is about this relationship that makes you feel insecure but you do run a risk of ruining it if you overthink and second guess.

I’m not sure if this is about where you are now or what you experienced in the past, but please do a bit of thinking around how to interpret messages and not read extra stuff into them that isn’t there. In good relationships there are push and pull, humour and sarcasm, it actually shows you are comfortable with one another.

As I say, not remotely having a go at you, maybe this has all been so good so quickly that you are almost waiting for things to implode, but please trust in what has been working so well and focus on that. Maybe put the brakes on a bit? Six months is early to be talking about moving in together, even if the moving in date is still another six months down the line. I wouldn’t talk about moving in until 12 months were done and dusted. I wish you luck, I truly do.

He was joking but you do sound needy, you might want to work on that.