I’m 37 and been single for 5 years. Over the years I’ve been on/off dating apps. I’ve never dated more than one person at a time. Once I arrange a first date, I just lose interest in the ones in the talking stage. I find I either lose interest in someone quickly, or I end it because I quite like them but they’re not emotional available. The last guy I dated I really liked but he was so hot and cold that I just walked away.
So sick of dating disasters I decided to just have fun, go on as many dates as possible and accept it’s probably going nowhere. Except; I’m now dating 2 people and I like them both. They’re so different, I like them in very different ways, but I can’t keep it up, I need to chose but I can’t.
Guy 1 is polar opposite to me, extrovert and I’m introverted. He’s very high energy, open, honest, wears his heart on his sleeve. I’m less open naturally but I have built trust, he recognises when he’s moving faster than me and adjusts. He’s a good dad, good job, own home. Actions match his words. Makes the time to see me around my children whilst still prioritising his, has them 50/50. So much fun to be around, we laugh and he brings out my more fun side.
I don’t know if I’d get tired of the high energy, I don’t know if he’ll calm as things get more serious.
Guy 2 is more on my level, calmer, more measured. A little more reserved. He doesn’t work, full time dad, no mum involved, big horrible back story and has had to make lots of sacrifices to be there for his daughter. Really difficult to find the time as both single parents but does make plans as much as possible. Cancelled a few times but I do understand, he has very limited support network. Has plans/ambitions for when daughter starts school. Less open emotionally and slower paced but not unavailable, I’d say cautious but not closed which is similar to me. I feel more secure in his presence but more anxious when away, more so because of all the barriers than how he is.
both have similar amounts of pros and cons. I just don’t know how to choose. Physically attracted to both but I’m holding back as I don’t want to go further with both at the same time. I couldn’t handle that.
how do I chose