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Original poster

New partner on 3rd date asking to watch porn together

100 replies

Poppyseeed · 23/07/2025 15:33

Wondering what others would think

We went back to their place and they asked if I wanted to watch porn with them. It’s only our 3rd date.

would this concern you

OP posts:
User37482 · 23/07/2025 18:35

I think I would probably leave it, if someones sex life has become quite heavily intertwined with porn it may be necessary for them to enjoy sex. It would be a bit much for me tbh.

JustFeedMeCake · 23/07/2025 18:41

New partner? It’s been three dates lol. The answer would be NO, from most people. I would definitely not be seeing them again. Grim!

Anyonecanachieve · 23/07/2025 18:43

JustFeedMeCake · 23/07/2025 18:41

New partner? It’s been three dates lol. The answer would be NO, from most people. I would definitely not be seeing them again. Grim!

This yuck!

PeggyMitchellsCameo · 23/07/2025 18:43

JealousyIsADisease · 23/07/2025 15:40

christ on a bike, that’s grim.
I’d have got up and left tbh.

Christ on a bike.
Sorry that made me laugh…
What channels that on then?
(No offence to Christian posters!)

Zanatdy · 23/07/2025 18:45

I don’t have an issue with porn, but a 3rd date when not had sex yet, inappropriate.

InWithPeaceOutWithStress · 23/07/2025 18:46

How did you respond, did you show her your porn collection?

LadyMonicaBaddingham · 23/07/2025 18:50

I would make my excuses, leave and block.

Livpool · 23/07/2025 18:57

Porn doesn’t bother me as much as others on here but that is grim! What a romantic(!)

TwistedWonder · 23/07/2025 19:00

I find it pretty bizarre that you’ve not had sex yet but she is talking about watching porn.

Id find it pretty grim if someone I only met 3 times wanted to watch porn together.

DiscoBob · 23/07/2025 19:01

If you're asking then it's probably wrong.

There could be circumstances where it wasn't. If you'd already slept together a few times and openly spoke of turn ons and the potential that porn might be part of things. And you felt cool with trying it out.

But it sounds like they didn't approach it at the right time or in the right way, and you are not turned on by the concept. So decline it.

DuesToTheDirt · 23/07/2025 19:02

In.The.Bin.

Bunniesandowls · 23/07/2025 19:03

I’d be equally concerned about you calling him a partner between 1st and second date.

Original poster
Poppyseeed · 23/07/2025 19:06

InWithPeaceOutWithStress · 23/07/2025 18:46

How did you respond, did you show her your porn collection?

No, I don’t have any. But I’m a normal bloke, I watch on my own . It was a bit weird and uncomfortable, you know I’m a “normal bloke” And obviously she’d watched a lot of porn

OP posts:
BlankBlankBlank14 · 23/07/2025 19:07

Bunniesandowls · 23/07/2025 19:03

I’d be equally concerned about you calling him a partner between 1st and second date.

Him? It’s a her that questioned about the porn.

Original poster
Poppyseeed · 23/07/2025 19:11

DiscoBob · 23/07/2025 19:01

If you're asking then it's probably wrong.

There could be circumstances where it wasn't. If you'd already slept together a few times and openly spoke of turn ons and the potential that porn might be part of things. And you felt cool with trying it out.

But it sounds like they didn't approach it at the right time or in the right way, and you are not turned on by the concept. So decline it.

It’s not about being turned on or not. I’m interested in peoples opinions on meeting someone go on a couple of dates, back to yours for a glass of wine and chat. She’s asking where the porn collection is. How would you react, what would you think of them. I was a bit shocked seeing as we’d not slept together and were still on the get to know you stage. Initially I never said I was a bloke as I wanted a female perspective.

OP posts:
gamerchick · 23/07/2025 19:11

It's going to be one of those threads.

OP you don't like it, it doesn't matter what any of us think. It probably doesn't have legs this one. Throw it back.

KateMiskin · 23/07/2025 19:12

I am quite surprised its a woman but my answer is the same. I would be weirded out, go home and bin.

Original poster
Poppyseeed · 23/07/2025 19:16

InALonelyWorld · 23/07/2025 18:24

Is this a reverse? You seem to know an awful lot about her sex life with her ex husband for it just being a third date. That in itself would be a big enough red flag, never mind the weird random porn conversation. If it's not, then it doesn't sound like this girl (?) is actually looking for anything serious.

We’ve been together awhile now and we’ve got a few relationship issues and I was thinking back to when we first met. At the time I just shrugged it off, but now when I think about it, it’s weird. As a lot of woman don’t even like there men watching, so to suggest on a third date and ask about porn I was interested what other woman would think and say.

OP posts:
Results9 · 23/07/2025 19:27

Wait a minute who ‘owns’ porn.. like.. dvd’s? 😂😂 is it not accessed for free online?

InALonelyWorld · 23/07/2025 19:28

Poppyseeed · 23/07/2025 19:16

We’ve been together awhile now and we’ve got a few relationship issues and I was thinking back to when we first met. At the time I just shrugged it off, but now when I think about it, it’s weird. As a lot of woman don’t even like there men watching, so to suggest on a third date and ask about porn I was interested what other woman would think and say.

Show quote history

Well that was a drip feed. What is the point in the thread if you ignored it and ended up having a long term relationship? Leave if your not happy

DiscoBob · 23/07/2025 19:32

Poppyseeed · 23/07/2025 19:11

It’s not about being turned on or not. I’m interested in peoples opinions on meeting someone go on a couple of dates, back to yours for a glass of wine and chat. She’s asking where the porn collection is. How would you react, what would you think of them. I was a bit shocked seeing as we’d not slept together and were still on the get to know you stage. Initially I never said I was a bloke as I wanted a female perspective.

Show quote history

I stand by what I said which is if you've not slept together or discussed it, then it is weird.

LlynTegid · 23/07/2025 19:32

Third and last date it would be for me. Porn leads to all sorts of things being normalised and women being exploited.

Anyonecanachieve · 23/07/2025 19:33

Ps ‘normal man’ 🤢 you are making excuses there my friend; that watching porn or having a porn collection is ‘normal’ especially for a man (sexism 101 to boot) !

https://unboundnow.org/pornography-amp-sex-trafficking/

normal people don’t get themselves off on the abuse of others - glad you can and don’t feel any shame or the fact you are complicit in abuse

Pornography & Sex Trafficking - Unbound Now

When considering what perpetuates sex trafficking, the more obvious factors include poverty, political instability, and gender inequalities. What most people often don’t recognize as a major contributor to sex trafficking, however, is pornography. It’s...

https://unboundnow.org/pornography-amp-sex-trafficking

Worriedmum67 · 23/07/2025 19:55

I did watched porn with one of my exes, just once as I wanted to know what kind of porn he liked but it was when we were already living together not in the 3rd date... Also most of the men watch porn online so it's weird of her asking you about your porn collection.. no one has dvd anymore...

Left · 23/07/2025 20:09

Hold up, so how long ago did this happen, and how long have you been together, and what was the point of this thread?

If you don’t think you’re compatible then just split up.